Ever think about E when you attend a function

lyndausvi · April 2012

Last night we went to a cocktail reception on a Navy Ship. There must of have been 300 people there. There were about 30 seats (without a table). 10 of which had reserve signs. I never saw anyone in any of the seats. There were a lot of cocktail tables and people just hung out there.

That is pretty normal for cocktail receptions I've attended. I've never thought twice about it, but everyone here thinks it a major problem.

lyndausvi · April 2012

rachers, it's actually pretty normal. Of course you will always have some people sitting because of medical issues or somthing, but in my experience a vast majority of people stand during true cocktail parties.

** cocktail parties being 1-3 hours long,

amys325 · April 2012

I definitely think about E when I attend functions...mainly weddings.

However, most things that go against etiquette that I didn't learn until E still don't bother me. Most of those things are so common around here for weddings that it's at pretty much every single one I've been to.

baystateapple · April 2012

Yeah, definitely. During most weddings I've attended. Most of them haven't had too many faux pas. At my BIL's wedding, they only had about 20 chairs for 150 guests during the ceremony. And at the shower I just went to, the bride's mother came up to me saying she was "So embarrassed, I invited people that aren't invited to the wedding!" I judged that.

Beachy730 · April 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ever-think-about-e-when-you-attend-a-function?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:83fecfc5-9689-4b47-b6b6-aa1356e7f7c2Post:86f9ba40-f988-4e66-8262-fb44f2b7b820">Re: Ever think about E when you attend a function</a>:
[QUOTE]I definitely think about E when I attend functions...mainly weddings. However, most things that go against etiquette that I didn't learn until E still don't bother me. Most of those things are so common around here for weddings that it's at pretty much every single one I've been to.
Posted by amys325[/QUOTE]

<div>Ditto. There are some things that will just never bother me or that I enjoy, like a gap. I don't really think I've seen too many breaches of E that aren't regional norms though. And I haven't actually gone to a wedding in a while because of our location and H's schedule. But I do judge stuff I see on FB and hear about. </div>

AdeleDazeem · April 2012

Yeah... but most of the stuff that bugs me now is the stuff that bugged me then.

I think gaps are rude, irritating and completely annoying. I thought that long before this site and will continue to do so.

At my brother in law's wedding, champagne was openly served to the wedding party and no one else. I like champagne and couldn't have any but it was dangled in front of me. Ick.

I will say that I went to a "wedding" of some college friends who had married nearly a year before that for health insurance reasons. They didn't tell too many people and most thought that this was their wedding. I thought it was no big deal. But, I really knew very little about weddings/marriage/insurance and the like. I think somewhat differently now having heard the arguments against it.

achiduck · April 2012

I never really thought about it until I went to a cocktail wedding where there were about 15 chairs for 230 people. We had a chair for maybe 10 minutes to eat and were then promptly (and very rudely) kicked out by the MOH. I ended up leaving early b/c my feet were killing me and it was a pretty small space for that many people and it was making me feel kind of claustrophobic.

There was also no dancing so people were expected to "migle" from 7 pm until 1 am when it ended. Right...

Starqueg · April 2012

I do think about it, but most stuff doesn't bother me. I have a bunch of cousins who have gotten married in the last 4-5 years. At two of the weddings, there wasn't really any seating during the ceremony. The first one was on a cliff overlooking a river in Maine, there was seating for the elderly relatives, but that's it. Honestly, that wedding was the most fun I've ever had at a wedding. We played lawn games after eating and had a blast. The other one was in Brooklyn. That cousin is Orthodox Jewish and follows a tradition where all weddings take place outside after three stars are in the sky. It was March, a few days after a blizzard. I was unaware of this tradition until that night, and was freezing. We couldn't hear the blessings, couldn't really see what was happening. The reception was fun, but I would have liked some warning about the ceremony. For her community though, that's the norm.

lisa3185 · April 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ever-think-about-e-when-you-attend-a-function?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:83fecfc5-9689-4b47-b6b6-aa1356e7f7c2Post:9ee3828e-d632-4e33-a965-8b2fae68919e">Re: Ever think about E when you attend a function</a>:
[QUOTE]I definitely think about it. I just said something about this in a post on Budget, but one of my coworkers is no where near her minimums for her venue so she opened up invitations to everyone in both offices. The B-listing doesn't bother me, but I'm bothered with myself because I want to attend for 2 reasons...1 that I've never attended a Polish wedding and I think it'd be neat and 2, because she lives in Northern NJ right outside of NY and<strong> I'm curious to see just how fancy/lavish/expensive weddings in that area are.</strong>
Posted by lovethebeach16[/QUOTE]

I've have been to 4 family weddings in NNJ. They all lived up to the hype of an NNJ wedding! I hear Polish weddings are known for the dollar dance :)

pkontk · April 2012

I do think about it as well. My dad preached the "seat for every butt" thing to me as SOON as I got engaged, and its one of the very few things he insists on. I 100% agree with him.

My friend has a honeymoon registry. I looked at it, and the web site, just to see what the site says for interested brides and grooms (are they upfront about just cutting you a check rather than giving the 'actual' excursions? Turns out they are not.) She only has a few things on the HM registry, but one of them says something like "We already bought our plane tickets, but would love if you helped us with that cost anyway."

Seriously?

pokepoke27 · April 2012

There are a lot of things that don't bother me. The big things are having seats for every guest and serving enough food/drinks. I think that for any occasion or party thrown, the guests comfort should be top priority.

[Deleted User] · April 2012

I definitely do think about it.

I went to a wedding where it was a buffet, but they ran out of food by the time our table was called. So I was STARVING the whole night and felt slightly sick from it. The WP was so large that they sat in a different room and got different food/drink, which was kind of weird and upsetting to me. Then, when the dancing started, they cleared away half of the tables and chairs to make room for the dancing. So, my stuff was put somewhere else while I was up and I had trouble finding it AND I had no where to go when I felt kind of sick from all the dancing and the lack of any food. I was so not impressed.

bonge · April 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_ever-think-about-e-when-you-attend-a-function?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:83fecfc5-9689-4b47-b6b6-aa1356e7f7c2Post:d9820688-5bbb-4289-ba61-436885c41d3a">Re: Ever think about E when you attend a function</a>:
[QUOTE]I definitely do think about it. I went to a wedding where it was a buffet, but they ran out of food by the time our table was called. So I was STARVING the whole night and felt slightly sick from it. The WP was so large that they sat in a different room and got different food/drink, which was kind of weird and upsetting to me. Then, when the dancing started, they cleared away half of the tables and chairs to make room for the dancing. So, my stuff was put somewhere else while I was up and I had trouble finding it AND I had no where to go when I felt kind of sick from all the dancing and the lack of any food. I was so not impressed.
Posted by vonclancy[/QUOTE]

How rude to just move your stuff. I would have left as soon as i found it. Especially after getting no food.

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