Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum

Seating Arrangements During Ceremony

I was raised by my grandparents with little influence from my mother. (long story, but she and I are not very close.) My grandparents legally adopted me and I only list them as my parents for any information I have to provide. When it comes to seating everyone at the ceremony, I do not want my mother to upstage my grandparents and walk in like my FH's mother would. How should I sit everyone? We are not doing unity sand/candle so it will just be walking in. Any suggestions?
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Re: Seating Arrangements During Ceremony

  • Why don't you have your FI's mom escorted in first, then your mom, then you grandma? Or do you not want your mom to be recognized and formally escorted at all? This is your choice and if you aren't close to your mom, I'm thinking she'd understand, but she also could be angry. 

    As for seating, is it her parents or your fathers that raised you? Depending on the relation and the relationship (as in if they are on good terms) I would consider seating them separately, with your grandparents on the first row and then your mom and some other relatives. 

    See, I am in a somewhat similiar situation with my dad's wife, but we have no relationship or even acknowledge each other, so obviously she will not be escorted in the processional. She will just be sitting there, maybe escorted in but not formally. My grandma is the MOB for all wedding purposes. 
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  • If you were legally adopted by your grandma, then legally she is your mother. She can walk in place of your mom, or not walk at all, whatever her and you decide. Your birthmom does not have to walk as part of the ceremony. I would still seat your mom with your grandparents in the front row, but not invovled in the entrance.

    My birthmom is in attendence at my wedding, but she's not my mom, she will be treated as a guest.

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  • I think you could have your mom go first then g-ma next.  Maybe get your g-ma a corsage and not your mom.  Maybe not have your mom walk in at all.  Could your g-ma and FMIL walk in together? 

    For us we had:
    my g-ma followed by my step mom, FIL escorting SIL, SFIL escorting MIL, then BP.  So I sat the bride side first thing grooms side last. 
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  • Thanks for your responses.. it was her parents who raised me. My birth father is not in the picture, but his parents will be in attendance. I'm thinking I will just let her walk in and sit down first and then have my grandma come in last, since my grandpa will be walking me down the aisle and joining her in the front.
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