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Not Engaged Yet
desertsun
member
Welcome to NEY **STICKY ME**
Hi! Welcome to NEY!
We're happy you're here.
However, before posting on this board, LURK.
Read back a couple pages to get a feel for the board.
Also, please be aware that many of the posters on this board do NOT encourage planning a wedding before you consider yourself engaged.
What constitutes planning? Researching venues, vendors, or flowers. Picking colors, wedding party attire, or your wedding dress.
It's okay to spot something you like while idly browsing the knot ONCE IN A WHILE and bookmark it with the thought of "someday maybe." It's not okay to spend a large amount of your free time poring over, for example, flower arrangements, with the idea of "saving time later" by picking out exactly what you want NOW. See the difference?
There are a variety of common reasons regs cite as to why "pre-planning" is not a good idea:
-Because it doesn't make sense to plan an event that you don't yet absolutely positively know IS happening.
-Because no one needs a year to plan a wedding. No one. We really, REALLY don't like to hear "I'm a planner, so..."
-Because by skipping ahead, you're living in the future instead of the present. You're denying yourself a wonderful experience -- the excitement and anticipation of looking forward to something that will only happen once -- a proposal. Once it's over, it's over, and you can never look forward to it again. Enjoy it while you can.
-Also, consider that you're not giving your BF or his proposal their due by skipping ahead of them.
-The personal experience of many of the married posters on this board is that wedding planning WILL GET OLD and that you are better off saving your excitement and energy for when it comes time to pick a date and start booking venues and vendors.
That said, it's okay to be excited, eager, and impatient sometimes and want to talk about it with people who understand. You can vent here. Just be prepared for people to be quite blunt when talking you down.
Lastly, only you and your BF can determine your relationship status. We cannot tell you whether you are or are not engaged. The general opinion on this board however is that you do NOT need a ring to be engaged; you merely need a mutual agreement between you and your BF that you're engaged and can proceed with wedding planning.
NEY regs are generally not malicious, but they are usually opinionated and honest (sometimes painfully so). However, if you can state a differing opinion with respect and maturity, diversity of perspectives is appreciated.
You're welcome to just start posting in threads, but it's also nice if you post an intro thread and tell us a little about yourself.
Again, welcome to NEY!
We're happy you're here.
However, before posting on this board, LURK.
Read back a couple pages to get a feel for the board.
Also, please be aware that many of the posters on this board do NOT encourage planning a wedding before you consider yourself engaged.
What constitutes planning? Researching venues, vendors, or flowers. Picking colors, wedding party attire, or your wedding dress.
It's okay to spot something you like while idly browsing the knot ONCE IN A WHILE and bookmark it with the thought of "someday maybe." It's not okay to spend a large amount of your free time poring over, for example, flower arrangements, with the idea of "saving time later" by picking out exactly what you want NOW. See the difference?
There are a variety of common reasons regs cite as to why "pre-planning" is not a good idea:
-Because it doesn't make sense to plan an event that you don't yet absolutely positively know IS happening.
-Because no one needs a year to plan a wedding. No one. We really, REALLY don't like to hear "I'm a planner, so..."
-Because by skipping ahead, you're living in the future instead of the present. You're denying yourself a wonderful experience -- the excitement and anticipation of looking forward to something that will only happen once -- a proposal. Once it's over, it's over, and you can never look forward to it again. Enjoy it while you can.
-Also, consider that you're not giving your BF or his proposal their due by skipping ahead of them.
-The personal experience of many of the married posters on this board is that wedding planning WILL GET OLD and that you are better off saving your excitement and energy for when it comes time to pick a date and start booking venues and vendors.
That said, it's okay to be excited, eager, and impatient sometimes and want to talk about it with people who understand. You can vent here. Just be prepared for people to be quite blunt when talking you down.
Lastly, only you and your BF can determine your relationship status. We cannot tell you whether you are or are not engaged. The general opinion on this board however is that you do NOT need a ring to be engaged; you merely need a mutual agreement between you and your BF that you're engaged and can proceed with wedding planning.
NEY regs are generally not malicious, but they are usually opinionated and honest (sometimes painfully so). However, if you can state a differing opinion with respect and maturity, diversity of perspectives is appreciated.
You're welcome to just start posting in threads, but it's also nice if you post an intro thread and tell us a little about yourself.
Again, welcome to NEY!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Welcome to NEY **STICKY ME**
I am in awe of Desert!
Motolyn's House Remodel Blog Starting anew Nov. 2012.
"Oceana swings from logical to anus punching." - Buttons
Planning / Married / Blog
Planning Bio | Married Bio
Family Blog
"Because by skipping ahead, you're living in the present instead of the future. You're denying yourself a wonderful experience -- the excitement and anticipation of looking forward to something that will only happen once -- a proposal. Once it's over, it's over, and you can never look forward to it again. Enjoy it while you can."
Shouldn't it be "living in the future instead of the present"?
Life is good today.
[QUOTE]I love me some Desert.
Posted by Soon2BMrsJeter[/QUOTE]
That's funny, I love ME some dessert!
<img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-tongue-out.gif" border="0" alt="Tongue out" title="Tongue out" />
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: STICKY ME : That's funny, I love ME some dessert!
Posted by desertsun[/QUOTE]
Hah. I was thinking that as I was typing it.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: STICKY ME : Hah. I was thinking that as I was typing it.
Posted by Soon2BMrsJeter[/QUOTE]
Me too.
I haz a planning bio
My Blog
My Blog
Loopster, I was kind of hoping you'd be like the Favors mod and just start responding to posts by saying "SEE THE DAMN STICKY." And then start banning people for being BSC.
No?
Fine. *pouts*
I don't know if people read Jeana's post, but this one definitely makes the board dynamic a bit more clear. I don't know if you really need to sticky it, though. I just kinda needed to vent a bit. I've been feeling really frustrated lately feeling like I'm saying the same things over and over.
Maybe at least if it was a sticky, I'd have a convenient place to go copy from to paste into newbie threads instead of having to type it all out again.
When people post craziness EVERYONE should post the link to the sticky. Will that make a point?
[QUOTE]This may not have been the best solution, but I added what you wrote desert to the original welcome sticky.
Posted by loopy82[/QUOTE]
And there you go putting words in Jeana's mouth, Loopy ;)
It's a really good post Desert, but I don't think more people will read it. SeaTea's right though, we can always just try linking it.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Welcome to NEY **STICKY ME** : And there you go putting words in Jeana's mouth, Loopy ;)
Posted by heyimbren[/QUOTE]
OMG LOOPY! WTF! <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-surprised.gif" border="0" alt="Surprised" title="Surprised" />
Just kidding.
If it had to be someone's words... I'm glad they were Desert's. <3
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Welcome to NEY **STICKY ME** : OMG LOOPY! WTF! Just kidding.<strong> If it had to be someone's words... I'm glad they were Desert's. <3</strong>
Posted by jeanacorina[/QUOTE]
Aw, thanks, Jeana! <3
Life is good today.