RSVP Dilemma

christinapayne · March 2010

Ok, so I have received 2 rsvps back this week--less than 2 weeks before the wedding! We have already turned in the final headcount, and have made seating arrangements, etc. However, we have room for more people. Should we make the adjustment and add them, or should we tell them they are too late?

HELP!

moonstone523 · March 2010

I know it sucks they are late, but I would make the arrangements to add them in.

fallen4ever84 · March 2010

I would add them in as well, if I had the space and it wouldn't be too much of a hassle.

erinbc87 · March 2010

Make the arrangements. It's not worth losing a friendship, or making a relative upset!

christinapayne · March 2010

I'm torn! One on hand they aren't necessarily VIPs--we invited them in case some of our family or close friends could'nt make it. Also, we would be saving our parents money with less mouths to feed. On the other hand, I will feel bad telling them they can't come because they missed the deadline.

It's so frustrating--people just don't understand how much time, money and effort goes into preparing for a wedding. And what makes it worse, I just finished my seating chart/escort cards! Ugh.

I don't know, my mom and FMIL are saying no, but FI is saying we sbould add them. I don't know what to do. Pray for me girls lol

dogluver315 · March 2010

Did you contact people once your deadline passed and if so, were you able to get a hold of them? I had to call people when our deadline passed and 3 days before our wedding, one of H's cousins called to say they were coming for Chicago. I told them that everything was in place and unless someone cancelled, they could go to the hotel restaurant on their dime and join us for dancing afterwards. They were fine with that and luckily for them, 2 people cancelled the next day and they had to be those people (at least for the escort cards and menu) and didn't have a choice in their meal.

If you have room, I would say add them. You could put them all at one table so as not to make the seating chart difficult. GL and let us know what you decide.

JulieNFlo · March 2010

I would definetly add them...I recieved RSVP's up until 2 days before the wedding. Really sucks...dont get me wrong I sat them in the back back back of the room and I gave them a piece of my mind:O)

But if you invited them it is cause you wanted them there at some point...so go ahead and count them girlie!!!

ufsweetiebear · March 2010

My gut reaction was "too bad, so sad". There's a reason why there's a date on the reply card.

But I agree with Julie. If you have the space & money to add them, do so (and give them a piece of your mind! LOL). By no means should you redo your seating chart or anything. The price of being late is losing priority seating.

Melis1273 · March 2010

While my gut reaction was..."you snooze, you loose," I agree with the PP's, if you have the room and it is not a hassle, add them.

christinapayne · March 2010

Thanks everyone--great advice!

Ok, new problem! So, just when we decided to add both couples to the list, we realized we miscounted! One family of 4 said they would be at the ceremony, but wouldn't stay for the reception. So, we thought we were at 126 for the reception, although we told the venue 130 so we would have more than enough food (it's a buffet). Well, it turns out we miscounted. We are at 128 for reception once we subtract the family of 4! So, we would really only have room for one of the couples. We can't tell one couple yes, and the other couple no. Now, if we add both couples, we should have enough food, but it would be dishonest to tell the venue 130, if there are really 132. I would rather tell them more than we need than less. But, I was also thinking there may be a few that do not stay for the reception who have not told us so, so we may be okay.

I know I am all over the place, but I want to do the right thing. Help! Help! Help!

ufsweetiebear · March 2010

Many caterers include 5% more meals than your final headcount specifically for situations like this (mine is in the contract). Since it's only 2, I think you're fine. Give the caterer a call and see what they say. It might not even be an issue.

christinapayne · March 2010

You know what, you're right! So, we should be good. Thanks!

JulieNFlo · March 2010

You will be fine...I had 2 people that did not show on my big day and I was out those plates of food and the cost so stick with what you have and you will be fine!

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