Wedding Etiquette Forum

Baby Bump on the wedding day

What do you think of that tell-tale baby bump under the dress?

A friend of mine just got married, 7 months pregnant. I don't know why, but I'm just not a fan. What do you think?

Would you get married very pregnant?

Just curious. :) Maybe it'll liven things up around here.
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Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day

  • I don't think its a huge deal as long as the couple is getting married for the right reason, not just bc they are having a kid together.
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  • I think it's fine.  Is it the most flattering?  Maybe not but I don't judge them.  I only judge when it's a shot gun wedding.  For example, what if a woman got pregnant half way through her engagement?  It's no reason to cancel/postpone/move up the wedding plans. 
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  • If I had been planning a wedding and had deposits down and everything and then got pregnant, yes I would get married while very pregnant.
    If I got pregnant and we decided to get married, I would JOP the wedding or wait until after I had the baby.
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  • Ah see I didn't even think about if it happened while the wedding was already scheduled or if they got married just because of the pregnancy.

    In my friend's case, it was the latter.
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  • I couldn't do it. I would never get married because of a baby, but if I were already engaged, I would certainly move up the wedding.
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  • Depends on the couple. It's easy for me to pass judgment on a couple who gets married ONLY because the bride is pregnant. If a couple had zero intention of getting married before they found out the girl was pregnent, then yes, I think it's ridiculous.  So I guess it all depends on how well I know the couple. But generally, I'm not a fan either. You don't have to be married to have a baby and you're really not fooling anyone when the bride is seventh months on the wedding day.
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  • If one wants the whole "wedding experience" then I think it's best done prior to the baby's arrival.  Once the baby comes, time is limited and priorities change - the wedding may get put off indefinately. 

    That being said, I don't agree with people getting married just because they got pregnant.

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  • One of my friends just had a private wedding 6 months earlier than expected for this very reason.

    I guess I'd just get married pregnant if I had to.  I'd be very reluctant to give up all the paid deposits and lose the chance to see my out of state family by moving or cancelling the wedding.
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  • If it's something you planned to do anyway, then I really don't see a problem with it.  If you're in a relationship but not necessarily engaged, and know you're going to marry each other someday, get pregnant, and decide you want to be married before the baby's born, what's wrong with that?
  • I don't think it looks bad...but I wonder how many people will look at her/pictures and wonder if she's getting married for all the wrong reasons...
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_baby-bump-wedding-day?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:8f4fd415-fcde-414b-86bb-2ee030a28dc8Post:d9b0fc5b-a507-405d-9963-16977bc5ea93">Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day</a>:
    [QUOTE]If I had been planning a wedding and had deposits down and everything and then got pregnant, yes I would get married while very pregnant. If I got pregnant and we decided to get married, I would JOP the wedding or wait until after I had the baby.
    Posted by BioGirl21[/QUOTE]

    This.  I went to the wedding of a friend who was 8 months pregnant at the time and that was no small bump, let me tell you.
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  • maggyruthmaggyruth member
    First Comment
    edited April 2010
    Well, if people didn't, there would be no reason to have created this wedding cake topper:

    http://www.photoframesplus.com/8654-ws.html?site=google_base

    o_O

    My favorite line on there is "It's exquistly tasteful and very well made"
  • For me, it's more of a vanity thing (I'm obviously having issues with that lately! Ha.) I wouldn't want to be all glammed up for the wedding and then POW. Baby bump. I'd feel like I'd be really unconformtable and unattractive, though some pregnant women are super cute.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_baby-bump-wedding-day?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8f4fd415-fcde-414b-86bb-2ee030a28dc8Post:d9b0fc5b-a507-405d-9963-16977bc5ea93">Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day</a>:
    [QUOTE]If I had been planning a wedding and had deposits down and everything and then got pregnant, yes I would get married while very pregnant.

    If I got pregnant and we decided to get married, I would JOP the wedding or wait until after I had the baby.
    Posted by BioGirl21[/QUOTE]

    This. I wouldn't want to lose deposits so if I was already planning I would probably just keep the wedding. However, if I had the option to change dates without losing the deposits then I would do that.

    I just can't imagine being comfortable enough while 7 months pregnant to want to have a wedding.
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  • I am firmly against marriage just because someone is pregnant. Worst.idea.ever

    I got pregnant, had a kid, thank god I didn't marry her dad. The split would have been 800x worse. .

    However I have deposits down already. If I get knocked up between now and the wedding day I don't care if it's my due date I'm getting married lol

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  • tidetraveltidetravel member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited April 2010
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_baby-bump-wedding-day?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:8f4fd415-fcde-414b-86bb-2ee030a28dc8Post:e2507713-bdf6-42e5-ba7b-6e0804e851c5">Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day</a>:
    [QUOTE]For me, it's more of a vanity thing (I'm obviously having issues with that lately! Ha.) I wouldn't want to be all glammed up for the wedding and then POW. Baby bump. I'd feel like I'd be really unconformtable and unattractive, though some pregnant women are super cute.
    Posted by mwhitson14[/QUOTE]

    I think it would depend on the stage of pregnancy.  If it's early and you just have a small bump, you just feel like you look fat.  Once it progresses to the <strong>ETA:</strong> <strong>definitely</strong> (see P2, spelled it right this time) pregnant stage, you don't really feel "fat" anymore.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_baby-bump-wedding-day?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:8f4fd415-fcde-414b-86bb-2ee030a28dc8Post:56071838-424e-4c47-b6e2-536d623808bf">Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day</a>:
    [QUOTE] I just can't imagine being comfortable enough while 7 months pregnant to want to have a wedding.
    Posted by felicity and reverie[/QUOTE]

    I'm with mwhitson.  I'd be much more worried about looking good than feeling good.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_baby-bump-wedding-day?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:8f4fd415-fcde-414b-86bb-2ee030a28dc8Post:1a6a7e22-c298-49d6-9519-75e5067e4b86">Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day : I think it would depend on the stage of pregnancy.  If it's early and you just have a small bump, you just feel like you look fat.  Once it progresses to the <strong>definately</strong> (see P2, <strong>spelled it right this time</strong>) pregnant stage, you don't really feel "fat" anymore.
    Posted by tidetravel[/QUOTE]

    oops...not this time. :) 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_baby-bump-wedding-day?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:8f4fd415-fcde-414b-86bb-2ee030a28dc8Post:1a6a7e22-c298-49d6-9519-75e5067e4b86">Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day : I think it would depend on the stage of pregnancy.  If it's early and you just have a small bump, you just feel like you look fat.  Once it progresses to the <strong>definately (see P2, spelled it right this time)</strong> pregnant stage, you don't really feel "fat" anymore.
    Posted by tidetravel[/QUOTE]

    Sarcasm?
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  • damn it, Kate!
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  • edited April 2010
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_baby-bump-wedding-day?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8f4fd415-fcde-414b-86bb-2ee030a28dc8Post:1a6a7e22-c298-49d6-9519-75e5067e4b86">Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day : I think it would depend on the stage of pregnancy.  If it's early and you just have a small bump, you just feel like you look fat.  Once it progresses to the<strong> definately</strong> (see P2, spelled it right this time) pregnant stage, you don't really feel "fat" anymore.
    Posted by tidetravel[/QUOTE]

    Nope, sorry. You definitely didn't spell that correctly! ;)

    ETA: sorry, wouldn't have said that if I'd seen the other posts :)
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_baby-bump-wedding-day?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8f4fd415-fcde-414b-86bb-2ee030a28dc8Post:4514ff7e-82a8-4c74-afb7-b14c16c653b0">Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day : I'm with mwhitson.  I'd be much more worried about looking good than feeling good.
    Posted by nhelene[/QUOTE]

    I think I would feel pretty awkward if I was in a traditional wedding dress with a baby bump because I would worry what people were saying about me.

    But, I would also be really sad if I was too nauseous to enjoy the food and dancing. I absolutely love to eat and if I couldn't enjoy that on my wedding day, I would be disappointed.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_baby-bump-wedding-day?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8f4fd415-fcde-414b-86bb-2ee030a28dc8Post:5a241af1-e468-4165-9b0b-ef024ddbfc81">Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day</a>:
    [QUOTE]I think it's fine.  Is it the most flattering?  Maybe not but I don't judge them.  I only judge when it's a shot gun wedding.  For example, what if a woman got pregnant half way through her engagement?  It's no reason to cancel/postpone/move up the wedding plans. 
    Posted by andyandhillary[/QUOTE]

    This. My MIL was 4 months along when she and FIL got married. They'd been planning it for quite a while, and talked about JOP-ing when they found out, but decided against it. People (including their own minister!) said horrible things to them about it, as if it were a shotgun wedding. That, as well as the bump in the photos, is MIL's only regret.
  • One of my friends got married this past October and it turns out she was pregnant at the time, but she didn't know.  (And she wasn't showing at all.)  It all made sense when she got home from the honeymoon, during which she did not want to do anything and couldn't figure out why, and took a test.

    They got engaged in August and had planned all along to have a short engagement, but I know that she worries people will think they just did it because she was pregnant and judge her for it.  I told her that all she can tell them is the truth, that she was planning for October anyway, she didn't know, and if people don't believe it then they're the ass.

  • I would move up the wedding if I was going to "show" on the wedding day.  It would be important for me to be married before announcing to everyone that we're having a baby.
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  • I was pregnant 17 months ago. FI and I had discussed getting married while I was pregnant, but I didn't want it to look like a "shot gun wedding". We waited until after DS was born, figured out the whole parenting thing, and then decided to get married. Part of it was figuring out if the whole "together forever" thing was for us, and the other was my own personal vanity of not wanting to be a pregnant bride.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_baby-bump-wedding-day?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8f4fd415-fcde-414b-86bb-2ee030a28dc8Post:d9c4796b-767f-4be9-9d75-a01abdc6f024">Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day</a>:
    [QUOTE]I would move up the wedding if I was going to "show" on the wedding day.  It would be important for me to be married before announcing to everyone that we're having a baby.
    Posted by ThePinkSuperhero[/QUOTE]

    <div>I agree with this.  I would either move it up or wait until after the baby to get married.</div><div>
    </div><div>But I'd be pretty pissed if I couldn't have champagne at my own wedding.  </div>
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_baby-bump-wedding-day?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8f4fd415-fcde-414b-86bb-2ee030a28dc8Post:1609bc79-04a7-4ee6-89c4-c5cd7a572647">Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day</a>:
    [QUOTE]I don't think its a huge deal as long as the couple is getting married for the right reason, not just bc they are having a kid together.
    Posted by shellydiane820[/QUOTE]

    Exactly. If you were planning on getting married and want to move the wedding up, or if you were engaged and got pregnant while planning your wedding, whatever, go for it. I wouldn't care at all. Things happen.

    I also think that waiting until after you have the baby to fit into the dress is kind of... weird. Plus, babies are a lot more time consuming than pregnancy. I don't have kids, but I feel that the first year+ of a kid's life is SO busy and expensive, than it's easy to put off a wedding for several years. So you might as well do it before.
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  • If I was already in the midst of planning then I would do it. Otherwise I would wait until after I had the baby.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_baby-bump-wedding-day?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:8f4fd415-fcde-414b-86bb-2ee030a28dc8Post:fc01dcbc-6d50-42d8-9c46-6aef2fb4357d">Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Baby Bump on the wedding day : Exactly. If you were planning on getting married and want to move the wedding up, or if you were engaged and got pregnant while planning your wedding, whatever, go for it. I wouldn't care at all. Things happen. I also think that waiting until after you have the baby to fit into the dress is kind of... weird. Plus, babies are a lot more time consuming than pregnancy. I don't have kids, but <strong>I feel that the first year+ of a kid's life is SO busy and expensive, than it's easy to put off a wedding for several years.</strong> So you might as well do it before.
    Posted by msmerymac[/QUOTE]

    If my FI's parents and my parents weren't helping us pay for our wedding, we would have JOPed it. They're SO expensive. More expensive than time consuming.
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