Cocktails and dinner before the Ceremony... am I crazy?

kgc1253 · May 2011

Ok it is a second wedding ....

I would like to have a candle light ceremony without having everyone out to all hours so here is my idea:

( i live by the ocean )

Cocktails and dinner over looking the sunset on the water.. (Dinner dress for me not cream in color)

Ceremony at the church (wedding dress off white)

Cake and champaign tost in courtyard at church

So am i carzy? I know the reception is to celebrate the wedding

mikachugray · May 2011

dont exactly think youre crazy. Honestly it seems like your putting the rehersal "dinner" ceremony and reception all in one night. Its cool but be careful you might get overwhelmed. I love the idea of having a couple drinks before the wedding. I already told my FI i am going to probably have a shot to calm my nerves before walking down the aisle with my BM and MOH. I get nervous/panic and black out so he 100% understands. I will be keeping this idea in mind, i am still planning

brianabrad · May 2011

It's just a little backwards from the norm which isn't all together bad. I think it would work but you will want to make sure you explain it well to guest so they understand what is going on.

jbwed1 · May 2011

I think it's a cool idea - I've considered it myself during the wedding planning process. My issue with it (as a bride....NOT as a guest), was that I figured I would be so completely nervous during the dinner, I would not be able to enjoy it....because I was looking forward to and anxious about the ceremony! haha - But as a guest, I would think it was a pretty cool idea and wouldn't mind at all. As a guest you would have a more specific timeline to work with, and know approximately when it would start and end - which is sometimes nice. I say, 'go for it!'

ajroark · May 2011

I wouldn't call it "crazy" but it's very different and I'm worried about guests being intoxicated during your ceremony and misbehaving? Other than that, I like the idea of the candle light ceremony - very romantic.

trix1223 · May 2011

I think it would become choppy. How do you get your guests to stop chatting, mingling, eating, etc. to move to the ceremony venue.

Some guests will take longer to finish their meals....do you wait for them or make them get up from dinner. Some will finish their meal quickly. How much time are you budgeting for dinner? How much for travel?

And then it seems sort of, I don't know, anti-climactic to go out into the garden, have a champagne toast, and then send everyone home.

I think a ceremony following dinner would work much better if it was all done in the same venue where you could be more fluid in your timeline.

GL

Lisa50 · May 2011

I have no idea what the answer is ... but what does Sarah Palin have to do with this?? I am confused. *sigh*

tenofcups4me · May 2011

I don't think it's crazy or wrong, but I also don't think it's a good idea. As a bride, I don't think I'd be able to enjoy the dinner knowing that the "main event" was still coming up. And I definitely wouldn't want to be drinking before the ceremony (at least not more than 1 glass of wine at the most).

For the guests, I agree with Trix -- the shuttling to the church after dinner seems like it will be awkward and break things up too much.

Can you plan your wedding in fall or spring when it still gets dark out pretty early but the weather in Florida should be warm enough for an outdoor event? That gives you the candlelight ceremony but not too late at night. Or skip the candlelight ceremony and just go for a sunset/candlelight outdoor reception.

You could do a cocktail hour before the ceremony, but I imagine you can't do that at the church.

Sarahkayfa · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_cocktails-dinner-before-ceremony-am-crazy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:1a48f0a9-6d02-4c5e-a792-779f50a66323Post:d5eb3ac6-6862-4c97-9b5f-af221071fc92">Re: Cocktails and dinner before the Ceremony... am I crazy?</a>:
[QUOTE]I have no idea what the answer is ... but what does Sarah Palin have to do with this?? I am confused. *sigh*
Posted by Lisa50[/QUOTE]

<div>tee hee....</div><div>
</div><div>To the OP- It's not traditional, but you can do it. It's been done (and beautifully.)</div>

AdeleDazeem · May 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_ceremony-ideas_cocktails-dinner-before-ceremony-am-crazy?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:10Discussion:1a48f0a9-6d02-4c5e-a792-779f50a66323Post:49deb8cf-f9fd-4387-bf4d-3303346bac51">Re: Cocktails and dinner before the Ceremony... am I crazy?</a>:
[QUOTE]It's just a little backwards from the norm which isn't all together bad. I think it would work but you will want to make sure you explain it well to guest so they understand what is going on.
Posted by brianabrad[/QUOTE]

This!

I do agree that I'd be a little nervous knowing the ceremony was still to come during dinner, but if that doesn't phase you - I think you're idea sounds different, slightly odd, but lovely nonetheless.

aegrish · May 2011

My friend did this in Las Vegas! it was fine! We weren't able to see her after the ceremony because they went to take photos, which was a bummer, but other than that it did not bother us at all. She did a first look at the restaurant where they had dinner and it was really fun to watch. Having it backwards didn't phase any of the guests, we were just grateful to spend time with them at the hosted meal.

bibliophile2010 · May 2011

My concern is that you would essentially be making people stay the entire time to both enjoy the reception and see the big event. I know that I had grandparents and little kids to keep in mind while planning, and they would not have lasted that whole time and would have had to miss a big chunk of the celebration the way you have it planned.

I would probably get antsy waiting for the ceremony, not really relaxing and enjoying myself because the ceremony is still coming up, and I want to be sober and alert to focus on the reason for the celebration: the wedding.

rkatz8 · May 2011

i think it's great to have a light cocktail hour with appetizers before the reception but i wouldn't do a full seated dinner. honestly sometimes there is so much food served during wedding that after a big meal people just want to go home and nap (especially if there's alcohol involved). it will be awkward to end the dinner abruptly and transition to the ceremony, but it will be a bit easier if it's a cocktail hour where people are alredy milling about and waiting for the next direction.

Hays2be · May 2011

We are doing cocktails, ceremony, dinner.

We're getting married on a Thursday (yes, all the important people can come) so we figure doing cocktails first will allow the ones that have to work time to arrive. When they all arrive, we get married, and eat dinner. Works for us.

Then again, we are 48 and 56, it's a second wedding for both of us, and about half of our guest are OOT and taking the week to go to the beach.

PinkGold&Roses · May 2011

I would probably just have the dinner afterwards, because you will have more time to relax, have fun, let loose a little, etc, because the ceremony will be over with, and there will hopefull be nothing to worry about. You can still have the toast and cake after dinner as well.

Cocktails and dinner before the Ceremony... am I crazy?

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