Wedding Etiquette Forum

Story time with (P&)E

OK, it's kind of slow today...so forgive me if this is dumb.  I'm bored.

A lot of people here have some really interesting stories.  I'm sure a bunch of them are true, but every now and then I have my doubts. 

Who do you think makes up a lot stuff on here?  Who do you think tells the truth most of the time, even if it might sound crazy?

Example: I think Sascha is awesome, but sometimes I wonder if she has really made out with all these famous guys.  I could be totally wrong, though.  (I'll probably get flamed now.)
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Re: Story time with (P&)E

  • well, on the flip side of this, I would love to hear Eastie tell some personal stories. I want to knowwwwwwwww.

  • For the record, I believe what Sascha says.  She has openly said that she DOESN'T talk about stuff like that all the time because she knows people will find it hard to believe.  I don't think she makes it up at all.

    Anyway...what is there to gain by making stuff up on the internet? 
  • I don't believe many people who tell me EVERY ONE in their area does a cash bar. The Boston board tries to tell me this all the time and I know better. Liars!

    I don't believe most people on here paid for their wedding in cash, with out going into even a bit  of debt. I think it is the party line, so I think people refrain from mentioned the debt they went into, even if it is not bad.
  • I've never thought a reg on this board is lying. It just never occurred to me. Speaking of crazy stories though, this crazy woman called me 8 times last night, thinking my number is her ex H's number. It's the same number, I asked. But it doesn't belong to her ex H any more. She called me a whore and accused me of fucking her ex H and told me that I was terrible for not letting her ex H get on the phone because she wanted to tell him "he was going to be a pawpaw." 8 times she called (past 10 PM) accusing me of the same stuff.
    image
    Whatever you hatters be hattin. -Tay Prince
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_story-time-pe?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:092c6639-2c21-4b4c-b760-8288d0be631bPost:f92c65d7-c30b-4135-b089-c5fe38964819">Re: Story time with (P&)E</a>:
    [QUOTE]For the record, I believe what Sascha says.  She has openly said that she DOESN'T talk about stuff like that all the time because she knows people will find it hard to believe.  I don't think she makes it up at all. Anyway...what is there to gain by making stuff up on the internet? 
    Posted by kate51485[/QUOTE]
    Yeah, I could definitely be wrong about Sascha.  Maybe I'm just jealous.  :-) 
  • I believe her.  She seems genuine.  Although, it is a message board, and I'm sure there are a lot exaggurations.  I like Sascha :)
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_story-time-pe?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:092c6639-2c21-4b4c-b760-8288d0be631bPost:bd61e0e3-a560-4f72-ad39-7e2aa0a708a7">Re: Story time with (P&)E</a>:
    [QUOTE]I don't believe many people who tell me EVERY ONE in their area does a cash bar. The Boston board tries to tell me this all the time and I know better. Liars! I don't believe most people on here paid for their wedding in cash, with out going into even a bit  of debt. I think it is the party line, so I think people refrain from mentioned the debt they went into, even if it is not bad.
    Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

    I won't be going into debt to pay for my wedding, and neither will my parents, but they are paying for the wedding.  I have no trouble admitting that, either.  It's what is done in my family all across the board.  We see it as a gift, I guess, or just providing for one another.  Similar to paying for education.  I'm not sure why general consensus seems to frown upon that.  When I pay for my child's wedding someday, I would feel terrible if they were judged for it.  I think it's great if you choose to and are able to pay for your own, I just don't get the judginess when it goes the other way.
  • LC, that is crazy.

    I don't know about out-and-out lying, but I'm sure there is a fair amount of sugar-coating that goes on or maybe some details that are left out.  I do believe Sascha's stories, though. 

    I've been honest in my posts, sometimes to my detriment, so sometimes I will hold back a little bit.  I wouldn't fib about anything personal though, because people's Google skills are way to honed and plus, it can all be potentially verified on my fb page.
  • edited February 2010
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_story-time-pe?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:092c6639-2c21-4b4c-b760-8288d0be631bPost:bd61e0e3-a560-4f72-ad39-7e2aa0a708a7">Re: Story time with (P&)E</a>:
    [QUOTE]I don't believe many people who tell me EVERY ONE in their area does a cash bar. The Boston board tries to tell me this all the time and I know better. Liars! I don't believe most people on here paid for their wedding in cash, with out going into even a bit  of debt. I think it is the party line, so I think people refrain from mentioned the debt they went into, even if it is not bad.
    Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

    I agree with the debt part.  A little bit of debt is NOT a bad thing.  I just hate how everyone freaks out if someone asks about putting the florist on a credit card.

    We ended up going into about $3k worth of debt for the wedding and we wouldn't change a thing about it.

    Also, my Dad was going to pay for everything and ended up having an emergency surgery 8 months before the wedding.  He's <u>NOW</u> helping us out in other areas.  I think if parents CAN pay for your wedding, it's amazing and not something to be judged for.  In my circle, it's very uncommon for the bride and groom to pay.

    EDIT: He's now... not that he's not.  Whoops.
  • edited February 2010
    Well, breaks and mrse are the obvious answers. I think frequently people here are either intentionally vague so that others draw their own (incorrect) assumptions about them or stretch the truth a bit to enhance their stories/make their wedding seem better.  But I don't think there's currently people here living out a completely fabricated life (AE's/trolls excluded)
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_story-time-pe?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:092c6639-2c21-4b4c-b760-8288d0be631bPost:8ea3d9d1-a99c-4d37-b4ac-aa6a46baa074">Re: Story time with (P&)E</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Story time with (P&)E : I won't be going into debt to pay for my wedding, and neither will my parents, but they are paying for the wedding.  I have no trouble admitting that, either.  It's what is done in my family all across the board.  We see it as a gift, I guess, or just providing for one another.  Similar to paying for education.  I'm not sure why general consensus seems to frown upon that.  When I pay for my child's wedding someday, I would feel terrible if they were judged for it.  I think it's great if you choose to and are able to pay for your own, I just don't get the judginess when it goes the other way.
    Posted by kate51485[/QUOTE]

    My parents paid for most of mine. No judgement here. It is interesting how you likened paying for a wedding to paying for college. That is exactly how they saw it, a responsibility they knew they would have and saved for it. I can kind of see why that could be judged, but if so, than judge away. I prefer to do the same for my children.
  • I don't get the debt part. We didn't go into any whatsoever. We had a small(ish) wedding and it was great, and I think that's what a lot of the others on here who didn't go into debt did too. I mean, I don't think it's bad if you were to go into a manageable debt amount that can be paid off shortly after your wedding, but I think people should have tried to avoid that.

    I find I tend to raise my brows at a lot of stuff on here, but by nature I'm very cynical so I have to sit back and be like "okay, that could be totally plausible" all the time.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_story-time-pe?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:092c6639-2c21-4b4c-b760-8288d0be631bPost:bd61e0e3-a560-4f72-ad39-7e2aa0a708a7">Re: Story time with (P&)E</a>:
    [QUOTE]I don't believe many people who tell me EVERY ONE in their area does a cash bar. The Boston board tries to tell me this all the time and I know better. Liars! I don't believe most people on here paid for their wedding in cash, with out going into even a bit  of debt. I think it is the party line, so I think people refrain from mentioned the debt they went into, even if it is not bad.
    Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]


    I was fortunate enough to have my parents pay for the wedding, and I know for a fact that they didn't go into debt over it.  We had a joint checking account for the wedding, so we stayed in budget and wrote checks/used debit card for everything.
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  • Everything I say is lies. I'm actually a 50 year old dude with 6 parrots in my house. They don't have cages, they just fly about and keep me company. I like how their poop ads pops of color to the carpet.
    Oh no we dropped the groom!! imagePlanning Bio UPDATED
  • M&M and Kate, my parents gave me the same college analogy. They came and stayed with me over the New Year holiday and I told my parents how much I appreciated their volunteering to pay for the wedding. They both told me they wouldn't have it any other way, and that they had always planned on paying for my wedding. Of course I'll end up doing the same for my kids.
    image
    Whatever you hatters be hattin. -Tay Prince
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_story-time-pe?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:092c6639-2c21-4b4c-b760-8288d0be631bPost:ef1343a1-d8c5-4bdb-ad1a-f242858d9f57">Re: Story time with (P&)E</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Story time with (P&)E : My parents paid for most of mine. No judgement here. It is interesting how you likened paying for a wedding to paying for college. That is exactly how they saw it, a responsibility they knew they would have and saved for it. I can kind of see why that could be judged, but if so, than judge away. I prefer to do the same for my children.
    Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

    I don't have an issue with parents paying for a wedding, and I think it's the same for a lot of people on here; the issue comes in when the bride and or groom get all entitled and "I wanna do this but my mom said no wwwaaaaaahhh" that gets them in hot water. If they pay, that's great, if you have to ask them to do it, not cool at all.
    image
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_story-time-pe?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:092c6639-2c21-4b4c-b760-8288d0be631bPost:b4a58dee-bd10-48b6-906e-833fbba17e32">Re: Story time with (P&)E</a>:
    [QUOTE]Everything I say is lies. I'm actually a 50 year old dude with 6 parrots in my house. They don't have cages, they just fly about and keep me company. I like how their poop ads pops of color to the carpet.
    Posted by agk0125[/QUOTE]
    You probably sit at the computer without any pants on.  Perv.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_story-time-pe?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:092c6639-2c21-4b4c-b760-8288d0be631bPost:ef1343a1-d8c5-4bdb-ad1a-f242858d9f57">Re: Story time with (P&)E</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Story time with (P&)E : My parents paid for most of mine. No judgement here. It is interesting how you likened paying for a wedding to paying for college. That is exactly how they saw it, <strong>a responsibility they knew they would have and saved for it.</strong> I can kind of see why that could be judged, but if so, than judge away. I prefer to do the same for my children.
    Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

    Exactly.  My mom has known for at least 5 years how much she would be able to help me with.  I do plan on paying for things here and there as I'm able to, though.  For example, my dress is on this coming month's credit card bill (no debt/interest acquired, just the easiest method of payment).  My parents are depositing installments in my account, and for what we've already spent, it's like 200 something bucks short if they were to pay for every last cent of the dress.  But, I have $200, so I'll just pick up the rest so they don't have to give me the next installment right now. 

    I just think people do a lot of assuming that if your parents are paying, you must have stomped your feet and been a screaming beebee until they agreed to give you money.  Definitely not so for us.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_story-time-pe?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:092c6639-2c21-4b4c-b760-8288d0be631bPost:0de63080-50dc-4740-bc7e-8eb0faa4629f">Re: Story time with (P&)E</a>:
    [QUOTE]I don't get the debt part. We didn't go into any whatsoever. We had a small(ish) wedding and it was great, and I think that's what a lot of the others on here who didn't go into debt did too. I mean, I don't think it's bad if you were to go into a manageable debt amount that can be paid off shortly after your wedding, but I think people should have tried to avoid that. I find I tend to raise my brows at a lot of stuff on here, but by nature I'm very cynical so I have to sit back and be like "okay, that could be totally plausible" all the time.
    Posted by alixzafiris[/QUOTE]

    I'll be honest.  I think there's a lot of protesting on here about debt.  I don't think nearly as many people are "debt free" as claim to be.  If so, then this isn't a representative sample of the N. American population.  Or else someone is doing a lot of lying about the average debt of an average American household.

    "You can take your etiquette and shove it!" ~misscarolb
  • My parents didn't pay for college and they aren't paying for the wedding, either. So maybe they do go hand in hand. I saved for college and worked my ass off for scholarships to be able to afford it. I'm not judging those who had it paid for (FI is one), but my parents didn't have a lot to save for us in the first place. My little sister (10 yrs younger) actually has a college fund, but she paid for this whole year by herself because she felt bad about dipping into the funds when she had the savings from her jobs. FI and I are paying for the wedding ourselves, all the while paying down debt that I have from a previous relationship.

    I hope that I can help my kids with college and wedding expenses when the time comes, but I also hope they are self reliant and resourceful enough to want to do it themselves.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_story-time-pe?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:092c6639-2c21-4b4c-b760-8288d0be631bPost:bd61e0e3-a560-4f72-ad39-7e2aa0a708a7">Re: Story time with (P&)E</a>:
    [QUOTE]I don't believe most people on here paid for their wedding in cash, with out going into even a bit  of debt. I think it is the party line, so I think people refrain from mentioned the debt they went into, even if it is not bad.
    Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

    We paid for our wedding in cash. We don't have credit cards (due to a college credit card that I am STILL dealing with), so we had no choice. Between my mom (who does have credit cards but wrote checks for everything she paid for) and I, we paid for everything as it came along. Which, my wedding was only about $12K, and divide that over about eight months, and we weren't coming out of pocket all at once. Having said that, if I had a credit card, it would have all gone on there only to be paid right off, so it would have worked out the same.

    But I can see how it would be less believable on some of the bigger money weddings.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_story-time-pe?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:092c6639-2c21-4b4c-b760-8288d0be631bPost:1d24b32b-614f-48da-a363-2159f910a6f0">Re: Story time with (P&)E</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Story time with (P&)E : I don't have an issue with parents paying for a wedding, and I think it's the same for a lot of people on here; the issue comes in when the bride and or groom get all entitled and "I wanna do this but my mom said no wwwaaaaaahhh" that gets them in hot water. If they pay, that's great, if you have to ask them to do it, not cool at all.
    Posted by alixzafiris[/QUOTE]

    I absolutely agree Alix. However, I have seen people freak out in various ways over the issue. For example, "my mom was a single mom, how dare you say she was a bad mom for not paying for my wedding?" Um no, no one is saying that. I think because it can be a sensitive issue people read into it. Or at least have, in the past.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_story-time-pe?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:092c6639-2c21-4b4c-b760-8288d0be631bPost:8e1ae508-a811-476b-8eb6-6e2b9d088f61">Re: Story time with (P&)E</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Story time with (P&)E : I'll be honest.  I think there's a lot of protesting on here about debt.  I don't think nearly as many people are "debt free" as claim to be.  If so, then this isn't a representative sample of the N. American population.  Or else someone is doing a lot of lying about the average debt of an average American household.
    Posted by wadingmoose[/QUOTE]

    We're not debt-free. We're both still paying of school loans but we didn't go into <u>any</u> debt over the wedding. We did what we could comfortably afford and nothing more than that.

    But yes, with regard to some other people on here, I agree with you.
    image
  • [QUOTE]I don't believe most people on here paid for their wedding in cash, with out going into even a bit  of debt. I think it is the party line, so I think people refrain from mentioned the debt they went into, even if it is not bad.
    Posted by MeaghanandMichael[/QUOTE]

    Paid in cash here with no debt, so it's possible. We planned for it with a long engagement and just saved. I don't judge parents paying either if they can. We're going to save up for education, wedding, etc just the same so if they need it, it's there. If not, more retirement cash for us.
  • FI and I both have a BA.  We each have a mortgage and an auto loan.  No student loans.  He is still tied to a CC that his ex has some debt on but is paying off slowly.  That's it.

    Most of the wedding stuff I've bought I've done via my CC, but it's been paid off monthly before accruing any interest.  The consumer protection stuff on AMEX is pretty handy, just in case, and I get FF miles that we used to buy our plane tix for the honeymoon.  At the end, I'll probably have about $1k on the card that I pay off the month after the wedding. 

    My parents didn't have to pay for college for me - I got a scholarship.  So, instead, they bought me a car so that I could drive back and forth to college.  And, years ago, they gave me some money toward a downpayment on my first home.  Thus far, they've not offered any wedding money, and I've not asked.  I *suspect* they're planning a nice wedding gift, but I don't feel entitled to anything.  I think FI is irritated by that, since his parents are paying for the RD, but it is what it is and I can't change that.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_story-time-pe?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:092c6639-2c21-4b4c-b760-8288d0be631bPost:50bf7c68-98c9-4e86-ad01-efc6d583a57a">Re: Story time with (P&)E</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: Story time with (P&)E : I agree with this, and it's also the area that you grow up in.  College was pretty much assumed where I grew up.  Down here where I teach, it's a big deal if they go to a 2 year school.  They also did a local survey recently about how differently HS teachers vs. college professors say that HS kids are ready for college.  HS teachers thought 90% were, professors thought something like 25%.  What a huge divide! So yes, I can definitely believe that national average.
    Posted by sucrets4[/QUOTE]

    EXACTLY!  I was fortunate enough to go to Arts Impact schools prior to high school so I wasn't necessarily a product of my environment, and my school values were already instilled hardcore in me.  My mom also NEVER let me hang out with neighborhood kids.  My only friends in the neighborhood went to catholic schools.  I thank her dearly for that!!!! 
  • [QUOTE]I agree with the statement that most people on TK have a BA or BS degrees.  A lot of women on here probably have jobs that require some sort of degree.  I don't think that's a stretch. Posted by bbyckes[/QUOTE]

    Good point. We're all just trying to avoid work =)
  • The seemingly higher rate of upper level degrees on here actually makes perfect sense to me.  In my experience, people with only a high school diploma tend to end up getting jobs where you don't sit in front of the computer all day with the opportunity to surf the web (for example, if you work at Burger King, you don't have the opportunity on the job to log in to the knot.).  However, if you have a college degree, you're more likely to get a desk job where you have access to the internet.
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    And betrothed, I'm disgusted with most of the comments that you have posted. I don't think I've ever read such judgmental comments in my life. I'm so lucky that the girls I speak to on theknot are nothing like you...I would've never come on here for ADVICE if I would've encountered a big a bitch as you. I genuinely feel awful for your children or your future children, and I think it would be irresponsible of YOU not to invest in their future therapy sessions starting now. Because trust me when I tell you honey, they're gonna need it. ~jcaruncho2010
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  • That's a good point, betrothed.
  • edited February 2010
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_story-time-pe?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:092c6639-2c21-4b4c-b760-8288d0be631bPost:e3441a3c-52ff-4539-9933-c969f894428b">Re: Story time with (P&)E</a>:
    [QUOTE]The seemingly higher rate of upper level degrees on here actually makes perfect sense to me.  In my experience, people with only a high school diploma tend to end up getting jobs where you don't sit in front of the computer all day with the opportunity to surf the web (for example, if you work at Burger King, you don't have the opportunity on the job to log in to the knot.).  However, if you have a college degree, you're more likely to get a desk job where you have access to the internet.
    Posted by betrothed123[/QUOTE]

    I was about say the same thing betrothed. Not to mention working at entry-level jobs can = inconsistent access to the internet at home. Of my close girlfriends back home, I am the only one with any kind of degree. One is a server, one delivers medical equipment for sleep disorders, one does real estate work during the day and serves at night, and the other one does dispatch for some delivery agency. I know they will never lurk here because they are out on their feet all day, and at least one of them keeps having her internet service cancelled at home because she has to pay other bills. So I can totally see how this could be true.



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