South Asian Weddings

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Re: Hello! New here...

  • Meghana55Meghana55 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    The advance parole should allow him to travel and as long has he has an I-485 pending (even better if the I-130 is approved).  The only sucky part is that the advance parole is not a secure document like a visa so he will be placed in secondary inspection and questioned (and since he's an F-1 he may get hasseled more).  And of course you are correct that there is a possibiliy that they would deny him entry although it's not as common. 
  • Meghana55Meghana55 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    And the FILs said they just want to be there, even if we just go to the courthouse to sign papers. LOL I've NEVER heard an indian parent say they'd be fine with a JOP wedding!!  haha  That would have never flown with our families!
  • edited December 2011
    His family is definitely unique!  Before FI came to the U.S. for school, his mom told him that she'd be happy with anyone he decided to date/bring home, even if he came home and said "mom this is my boyfriend".  Hahaha. I still tease him about that one.I know I definitely lucked out.  We know one person who dated an Indian guy for 3 years without his parents ever knowing, because they wouldn't approve.  And another friend of mine is dating a guy whose parents are still trying to set up an arranged marriage for him. Yikes!
  • edited December 2011
    Snoozy, your ILs sound fabulous!!  If everyone is flexible with customs/traditions, you are soooo golden.  That said, my family and my husband's family were also super flexible and we ended up with two weddings (it's just way too hard to have a traditional Catholic ceremony combined with anything Hindu).  If you're not Catholic, you're set, though!
  • edited December 2011
    I highly encourage being risk averse when it comes to visas, immigration, the US government, and any traveling. FI and I have been dealing with immigration and visa issues for 2.5 years and we've been long distance the entire time. And it all started with him traveling abroad during a time that an extension had been filed for his visa which mysteriously was not in their system when he tried to come back to the country and the people he dealt with would not even look into it. In any case, after all this time, he is finally coming into the country tomorrow. Last time he was here was Feb. 2007 -- let's just say I'm relieved and won't believe it till I see him set foot on American soil! So the moral of my story is that don't take any chances that are not 100% safe and fool proof -- advance parole and all!
  • edited December 2011
    We haven't been through advanced parole yet, but I would caution against being TOO worried here and really throughout the process.  When I started asking questions, I was getting a lot of overly cautious "doomsday" advice from one attorney in particular.  It was literally worrying me sick.  I talked to several other attorneys who specialize in immigration along the way and they all seemed to say that this person was WAY too cautious and not giving "real world" advice.  If I listened only to this person I'd be "100% okay," but it wasn't worth all of the grief. I was losing sleep (and occasionally fighting with FI) because of all of these overly cautious "what if" scenarios.Again, I'd speak to an immigration attorney, preferably one who offers more "real world" advice, but my understanding of Advanced Parole is that the secondary inspection is really just to authenticate the paperwork.  Lots of people use it, and your attorney can help you in navigating all of this.               
  • Meghana55Meghana55 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    secondary inspection is moreso a really big annoyance.  They can keep you there for a couple of hours (sometimes resulting in missed flights if you have connecting flights) sistergh - I totally get that some attorneys are overy cautious.  But be careful, but some are way too lax about stuff like that.  It's better to be a little on the conservative side, particularly because the intention of an F-1 visa holder should be to return to their home country.  Better safe than sorry IMO! megha - that's awful!  I'm sure everything will be fine, but I can't imagine how hard that must have been!
  • Meghana55Meghana55 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    overy = overly
  • edited December 2011
    I've talked to at least 3 other attorneys that I trust, one of whom is that attorney's superior and another of whom worked as an attorney with USCIS/ICE for quite a while before going into private practice.  My point is it's just easy to let this stuff eat you up and there's no need to spend your life in a fearful vacuum for the next 2 years if you have folks you trust advising you in a real world manner.   
  • Meghana55Meghana55 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Also true! :-)  As long as you're speaking to reputable attorneys then I'm sure you're getting appropriate advice!  I just know there are a ton of hack attorneys out there (many located in Edison, NJ) who will tell you anything you want to hear just to get money.  They'll promise you a greencard or H-1B or whatever, even if you have absolutely no chance of getting one.  Didn't mean to scare any of you girls if I did!
  • edited December 2011
    Welcome Snoozy! New here myself ;) and also getting married in NYC. You should check out D2M's SA knotties bio link. It has a lot of wonderful bios/pictures and inspiration.
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