Community› Wedding Discussion Boards› Pre-wedding Parties
Pre-wedding Parties
New Discussion

Bachelorette Party...to invite or not to invite?

stacy&tigestacy&tige
First Comment
in Pre-wedding Parties
I'm a little stressed about my bachelorette party and here's why: I really don't want to invite my FSIL, but I am planning inviting FBIL's wife and other FBIL's girlfriend.  I like the wife and girlfriend of FBILs; we talk and email each other all the time; I consider them my friends.

The first reason I don't want to invite FSIL is that I just really don't like her. She doesn't say more than two words to me when we see each other; I've tried to force conversation but she's not having it. She's rude to my FI all the time, has been her entire life. When my FI is upset with his sister he'll say stuff like "she's lucky she's even invited to the wedding." Total family drama. The other reason is I know there is no way she can afford to go to Vegas with me and my girlfriends. Plus, she has major back problems, even though she's younger than me, which would prevent her from partying it up all weekend.

I'm just wondering if I should extend a courtesy invite and hope she won't come or just not invite her at all.

I'm leaning towards just not saying anything about it to his side of the family. I doubt his sister will care either way but FMIL will probably throw a huge hissy fit about me not including FSIL...UGH!
Report Reply to Post

Re: Bachelorette Party...to invite or not to invite?

  • Simply FatedSimply Fated member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_pre-wedding-parties_bachelorette-partyto-invite-not-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:32Discussion:aa960faf-5018-40ab-b1a8-9a9803b16dd6Post:6cf3d348-7aea-4037-aee3-9db1723a0ab3">Bachelorette Party...to invite or not to invite?</a>:
    [QUOTE]The other reason is I know there is no way she can afford to go to Vegas with me and my girlfriends. Plus, she has major back problems, even though she's younger than me, which would prevent her from partying it up all weekend. I'm just wondering if I should extend a courtesy invite and hope she won't come or just not invite her at all.
    Posted by stacy&tige[/QUOTE]

    Her financial situation is her business and you shouldn't not invite her just because of that. If she can't afford to come, she can't come and that's that. This is a choice she gets to make. And I don't see how her back problems would prevent <span style="font-style:italic;">you</span> from having fun. Let her know the itinerary and let her decide if she will be able to participate.
    Extend the courtesy invite and hope she can't come, if it means you can keep the family peace. Chances are, you'll be having too much fun and be too smashed to even remember she is there. :)

    BTW, I wanted to point this out to you... I had back troubles when I was about 19, so please don't assume that just because someone is young they are somehow immune to back problems. We all have health issues and age is often irrelevant.
    image
    Report Reply
  • stacy&tigestacy&tige
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I should simplify I suppose...if I don't like her does she really need to be invited? Regardless of her personal issues...
    Report Reply
  • waltzingmatilda13waltzingmatilda13 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If you want to look like a b*tch, by all means, don't invite her, because how would you feel if she singled you out and didn't invite you to an event that included every other female in her family. She's going to be in your family for a while so I would suck it up and invite her to make peace.
    image
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    Report Reply
  • trix1223trix1223 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Listen to Matilda.  If you invite every other family member of yours~and it doesn't matter if they're on YOUR side or your FI's side, and exclude the one person, guess who's going to look bad here?  HINT: It's NOT your FSIL.

    If you're going to hear about this at every family gathering from now on, extend the invitation.  I always counsel that starting your married life by being rude to someone who is a future in-law never seems to bode well to me.

    Heck:  she may decline anyway because she doesn't like you either.  Then you're the better person:  you made the offer, SHE declined.

    And please don't make assumptions about her finances or her health issues.  They are not your business, and you shouldn't be making those decisions for/about her.
    "Trix, it's what they/our parents wanted. Why so judgemental? And why is your wedding date over a year and a half ago? And why do you not have a groom's name? And why have you posted over 12,000 posts? And why do you always say mean things to brides?" palegirl146
    Report Reply
  • loop0406loop0406 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Extend a courtesy invite
    Report Reply
  • stacy&tigestacy&tige
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In my head I know you are all correct...I guess I'm just going to have to get over the fact that I have to attempt to include someone I really detest.

    ::HEADDESK::
    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards