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vtyson2008vtyson2008
in Chit Chat
o
*working on #3 - Baby Boy*
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    AlexiaANDRobertAlexiaANDRobert
    First Comment
    I'm only going to answer about the date because the rest is just way too much, but if you're planning your wedding for around the time you're going to deliver, I don't recommend that.

    Babies can be born early or late, I'd either push it way up, so you're in your second trimester, or push it way back so you know the baby will be born.

    I say this because someone on the Etiquette board delivered at 33 weeks, a friend from high school delivered at 30 weeks, and I know several people that have delivered up to two weeks after their due date.

    Good luck.
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    SheDiva4SheDiva4
    First Comment
    edited April 2010
    [QUOTE] so now i am freaking out about whether or not to move the date, because we should miss the date by at least a couple weeks, but still it will be hectic if i need to mess with the dress or things like that - <strong>and now he's barely talking to me about either the baby or the wedding</strong> - so yeah any suggestions about what to do? We don't have an exact due date but it will be between the third week of october ant the second week of November and The Date is Set for October 10th - And Even Best Yet My Fiances Cousin whom just married in Aug2008 and has their son in Oct 2009 now are pregnant again and due around the same time as i am - so that takes away from both my wed and my baby (i don't want to sound like a brat,<strong> but everyone still oohs and aahs over their first baby</strong>)  Posted by vtyson2008[/QUOTE]

    First of all you need to talk to you FI about the baby, the wedding should be very low on your priority list now.  Is he happy, was is unexpected. The two of will need to deal with this before anything else.

    As for the wedding you can move the date if it is feasible and not an added expense.

    Lastly please take a deep breath and let you issues with your FI's cousin.  Children are not prizes, or show pieces.  <strong>They are adorable human beings who need their parents to love, take care of them and rise above the BS.</strong>

    As long as you and your FI love and care for your child, who cares about anyone else.  Please for the sake of you children, do not get sucked into a situation where your children are in competition with other children in the family.  It rarely ends well.

    Best of luck and Congrats!
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    dykonsdykons member
    First Comment
    I'm confused. Are you worried about whether you'll be able to having a wedding when you are 8-9 months pregnant and the logistical difficulties that surround that? Or are you worried that someone else having a baby is going to take the spotlight away from you?

    It sounds like you have a growing family and you should focus on that, not your cousin's kid.  Why doesn't your fiance want to talk to you about the big decisions happening in your relationship? You need to fix that first before you do anything else.
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    goheels05goheels05
    First Comment
    That is cutting it entirely too close.  You probably need to reschedule.
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    honeybear9311honeybear9311
    First Comment
    just breath. its okay. Me, personally, couldn't handle preparing for a baby and a wedding that are within a month from each other!! And what if the baby came early? Why isnt your FI talking to you?
    Have you considered moving the date up? GOOD LUCK!
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    dykonsdykons member
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_planning-pregnant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:fc0503d9-f0e9-4732-9942-86f6e6cf5fe6Post:68d5f694-4e25-49f8-b368-93a483ea13aa">Re: Planning and Pregnant</a>:
    [QUOTE]just breath. its okay. Me, personally, couldn't handle preparing for a baby and a wedding that are within a month from each other!! And what if the baby came early? Why isnt your FI talking to you? <strong>Have you considered moving the date up?</strong> GOOD LUCK!
    Posted by honeybear9311[/QUOTE]

    <strong>please</strong> don't move your wedding up if your fiance isn't tlakign to you! rushing into marriage is not a good idea. having a wedding will not fix the current problems in your relationship.
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    MISSCOURTNEY20MISSCOURTNEY20 member
    First Comment
    Okay, I wil give the advise that my sister received when she found out that she was pregnant and planning a wedding. DROP THE WEDDING!!! Now that you have a baby on the way, that should be your focus. They were planning for a GRAND event, and it turned out to be 17 people in the chapel of our church and then dinner downtown. Now, it should not even be about the "wedding" but more about you guys getting married. Did you all plan to get pregnant? If not, then why weren't you all a little more careful? Why isn't he talking to you now? It seems like the last thing you should be doing is looking at TK for answers......where is your FI???????
    And the whole time, my future husband was in the room...... image image
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    SheDiva4SheDiva4
    First Comment
    [QUOTE]it's not that he's not talking to me - but when we are planning anything it's like "oh..ok, yeah" or "well did we decide on that?" which he says after i ask him definitively yes or no and the order is practically in! it's so ridiculous and it's just stressing me out more - i have recruited my mom to help us plan the wedding so it's not all me asking him questions (she approaches him calmer also but it hasn't changed), but he still acts that way, and when asked if he wants to move the date he just says that if we need to we can, but doesn't help me levy the situation 
    Posted by vtyson2008[/QUOTE]

    Your FI doesn't sound like he doesn't care but like he would rather give you the freedom to make decisions about the wedding. Has he balked at any decision you made without him so far?
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    526SadieSadie526SadieSadie
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_planning-pregnant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:fc0503d9-f0e9-4732-9942-86f6e6cf5fe6Post:8e99e408-319f-4d40-b6ef-5486f1c2a3a4">Re: Planning and Pregnant</a>:
    [QUOTE]I'm only going to answer about the date because the rest is just way too much, but if you're planning your wedding for around the time you're going to deliver, I don't recommend that. Babies can be born early or late,...Good luck.
    Posted by AlexiaANDRobert[/QUOTE]

    Yeah I'm agreeing with this. Our best man and his wife were three or four months in when they got married (she was told she was infertile and then SURPRISE!!) and they planned it really quickly, but it was still very nice.  There are all kinds of complications that can happen that late into a pregnancy, what if you're put on bedrest? Preeclampsia?
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    marateamaratea member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    wtf? why does everyone DD when they either get their question answered or don't get the validation they're  looking for? gah.
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    luckyme502luckyme502 member
    First Comment

    There are so many things wrong with you post I don't know where to start, but... you are pregnant with a child by a man who isn't speaking to you right now.  That should be the first thing you deal with. 

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    luckyme502luckyme502 member
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_planning-pregnant?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:fc0503d9-f0e9-4732-9942-86f6e6cf5fe6Post:45444f4b-fbe7-4ad8-b8b7-dc419653e38d">Re: Planning and Pregnant</a>:
    [QUOTE]Okay, I wil give the advise that my sister received when she found out that she was pregnant and planning a wedding. DROP THE WEDDING!!! Now that you have a baby on the way, that should be your focus. Posted by MISSCOURTNEY20[/QUOTE]

    I don't agree with this.  I think it would depend on the circumstances.  FH and I are not doing anything right now to prevent getting pregnant.  Our wedding is in July, so it would be fine.  We have been together for 3 years, we are stable and we just figure it's close enough to the wedding.  I guess the difference is we are prepared for it, it won't be a surprise if we get pregnant.  Also, I'll be 32 in May and FH will be 34 in August.  Not that we are old, but we aren't getting any younger. 
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    2011 Reading Challenge

    Jessica has read 16 books toward her goal of 150 books.
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    "It's fine to have an open mind, just not so open your brains fall out."
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    duckie1905duckie1905 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    wow, you are nervous about your own baby stealing your wedding thunder?

    hahahaha, lovely.  There a bagazillion things wrong with your post. 
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    aerinpegadrakaerinpegadrak member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    Your fiance isn't talking to you about two major life changes.  How is this not a red flag?

    If you're not in premarital counseling, you should be.  If DH were refusing to talk to me about any issue, especially one of two which is the biggest you'll ever face together (getting married and having children), I'd be trying to get to the bottom of it no matter what it would take.

    Frankly, you shouldn't be getting married until you are able to talk maturely and rationally about the child you're bringing into the world. 
    This is a neglected planning bio.
    This is a belated married bio, with no reviews yet because I'm lazy.

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    Sometimes I feel like people think that brides are delicate little flower princesses who get all dressed up and pretty for one special moment of their dreams, when really they're just normal people who just happen to be getting married. Things shouldn't have to be sugar-coated for grown-ass women. -mstar284
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