What would you do?

peaches178 · June 2011

The wife of one of our groomsmen recently asked FI if our photographer could take some pictures of just her and her husband while we're doing family photos, because they'll both be dressed up nice. FI didn't know how to respond, so he just told her he'd get back to her.

I want to say that it's totally fine because, after all, it's just a few photographs, her husband is in the wedding party, and we're very close to them. Plus, throughout the day the photographer will be taking photos of our guests anyway. However, what I'm worried about is that:

a) She wants them taken during the formal family shots that we're having done before and after the ceremony, so it could cut into the time our photographer has to take pictures of FI and me.

b) It'll wind up being more than just the husband and wife because I have a feeling she will also wind up wanting pictures of her with her her kids, her kids with their significant others, her with her sisters and brothers, etc.

c) Word will get out and we'll have people coming out of the wood works asking if we can do the same for them because they're looking to get some free formal family photos taken.

What do you all think about this? Should we just say that it's okay? Should we tell them it's fine as long as their photos are taken after ours are done (even though that could wind up taking time away from shots our photographer could get of our cocktail hour)? Should we say it's okay with the stipulation that they can only have a few shots taken and they can only be shots of the wife and her husband? Should we just tell them no? Or is there another alternative that I'm not even thinking of?

goaliegirl · June 2011

I would just tell her that it can't be done while doing the formal shots with everyone, but it shouldn't be a problem maybe during the reception during down time, etc. During our reception, our photographer took a bunch of pics of my sister and her family because they were all dressed up and they wanted a nice photo. We also gave the photographer a list of other shots we wanted, our hockey teams, our HS friends, our College friends, etc...maybe these people can be part of those types of shots if you are doing something like that. I don't think it would be a problem as long as it isn't cutting into your time.

goaliegirl · June 2011

oh...I would probably mention that it can only be one or two shots as the photographer will be busy taking all the other shots he needs to get!

mbcdefg · June 2011

I don't think it's a problem, if they only do a couple quick photos and she's not just trying to get a free family photo session out of it.

If you think she'd hog the photographer's time during the post-ceremony shots, I would just say something like, "I'll give the photog a heads-up that you want a nice shot taken" and then ask the photog to do it during the reception or pre-ceremony before you get to the venue/church (and give her the excuse that he's on a tight schedule).

sgdc2011 · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_would-4?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:90Discussion:8b4e00be-c035-4ea9-b638-13d9a75ed64aPost:6ff20957-baf2-4c06-ab5c-4b5f5b87afa5">Re: What would you do?</a>:
[QUOTE]I would just tell her that it can't be done while doing the formal shots with everyone, but it shouldn't be a problem maybe during the reception during down time, etc.
Posted by goaliegirl[/QUOTE]

This

JoBell123 · June 2011

Agreed with PP. Limit the amount of time & do it during down time, not during your formal shots.

Reilly626 · June 2011

I had my photographer take pictures of everyone because I wanted them, so tell her they will take some at some point in the night.

jchristel · June 2011

My photographer took a few shots of each groomsman and bridesmaid with their date/spouse/significant other anyway. I think a lot of them do.

cindyn9178 · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_would-4?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:90Discussion:8b4e00be-c035-4ea9-b638-13d9a75ed64aPost:ae0afcb5-2f39-4d9e-b544-d0bedfaeea0d">Re: What would you do?</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't think it's a problem, if they only do a couple quick photos and she's not just trying to get a free family photo session out of it. If you think she'd hog the photographer's time during the post-ceremony shots, <strong>I would just say something like, "I'll give the photog a heads-up that you want a nice shot taken" and then ask the photog to do it during the reception or pre-ceremony before you get to the venue/church (and give her the excuse that he's on a tight schedule).</strong>
Posted by mbcdefg[/QUOTE]
This.

Ky925 · June 2011

let her know that the photog will take pics of them during the reception

kristen8040 · June 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/local-wedding-boards_new-jersey_would-4?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Local%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:90Discussion:8b4e00be-c035-4ea9-b638-13d9a75ed64aPost:ae0afcb5-2f39-4d9e-b544-d0bedfaeea0d">Re: What would you do?</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't think it's a problem, if they only do a couple quick photos and she's not just trying to get a free family photo session out of it. If you think she'd hog the photographer's time during the post-ceremony shots, I would just say something like, "I'll give the photog a heads-up that you want a nice shot taken" and then ask the photog to do it during the reception or pre-ceremony before you get to the venue/church (and give her the excuse that he's on a tight schedule).
Posted by mbcdefg[/QUOTE]

<div>Agreed</div>

banole · June 2011

The photographer should have experience dealing with guests who want their photos done. He should know how much time and shots should be alloted for your guests and how to tell them when to take pictures and how many pictures in a proffesional mannor. Give your photographer a heads up that its ok for him to take family photos and friends and group pictures and he should be able to handle the rest.

StefaniBel · June 2011

I would say that would be no problem to take a couple of pictures of the two of them while having the reception.

peaches178 · June 2011

Thanks all! Your advice is just what I needed. We'll tell her it's no problem as long as our formal pictures are done and she doesn't take up too much of the photographer's time. We'll also give a head's up to the photographer about it and we'll be sure to tell her that if other guests start bombarding her with requests she has our permission to do as she sees fit at the time (whether that's taking a couple quick shots or telling them she has a job to do and can't).

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