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August 2010 Weddings

Poll: Finances

j/w if any girls living with their FIs have merged their bank accounts yet?  Me & my FI are in the process of doing so right now. Also, after you get married are you going to make everything joint or have accounts in your own name. (We are going to be combining everything & making it joint).

Re: Poll: Finances

  • Right now FI still lives in Baltimore (His move to Chicago to be with me got delayed due to the economy) so we have not combined anything. We have not decided how or when exactly we will combine things, especially because I am still in grad school, so my money isn't really even mine (its loans). Once I graduate in December, start working, and he moves to Chicago, we will figure it out. It's helpful and interesting to hear what works for others though.
  • I know I'm coming into this late, but I have a couple things to share.FI and I got a joint account right away 6 years ago when we moved in together. That way he can transfer money to me instantly, and I pay all the bills.  I totaled up the monthly costs and he pays me a flat rate. I call it "monthly dues".  His own bills (cell phone) he pays out of his own accounts.  I also have several personal accounts such as credit cards and CD's that I manage.  He is aware of them because we are very open about our money, but he has no reason or interest in being attached to them.Our BestM and MOH are married to eachother.  They had accounts at separate banks, so they could never decide who should merge with who... so they never did.  He writes her a check every month for what he owes on the bills, and she pays the bills.  I talked to them a few times about ideas on how to merge without losing the bank they each liked, but they decided to stick with that.  FI and I don't agree with their system, but what works for them.... is their choice.  They pay for everything separately and do not always share their purchases with each other (he buys video games and camera accessories).  They view it as "i made my own money, I can spend it on me".
  • Yeah, I was def. like that before....it's hard to get out of the "it's my money mode". I think it helps to take a step back & realize its OUR money. FI is still in law school so $ is tight, but I'd rather not have to write out checks to each other every month or figure out who paid what in groceries, bills, etc. I'd rather simplify my life & just put everything in one bank acct. that we can each use. I'm also adding him to my savings b/c if I die before we get married he is my beneficiary automatically. Not to be pessimistic, but it's a lot simpler (even though it doesn't seem like it) when you get divorced if everything is joint -- that way no1 can say "it's my money...bla bla bla" (when in reality the other person has been paying marital bills out of their "personal" acct. which automatically doesn't make it personal anymore it makes it marital). Ahhh...I have such a love/hate relationship with family law....
  • We have two accounts but all our bills are paid out of one bc I handle all that
  • Not sure what we're going to do... FI has three different checking accounts, a savings account, and then all his financial portfolio in another. I have one checking and one savings haha. Guess we'll just have to pick one when we get closer...
  • I would not feel comfortable joining bank accounts until we are married.  We plan to create a joint bank account when we are married.  We will maintain our current accounts and each take a certain amount of money per month, sort of like an allowance, this way neither one of us will have to ask the other for money.  Does that make sense?
  • We each have our own checking and savings accounts, and we have a shared checking account for household bills, plus a shared savings account for vacations we take together (honeymoon :) ). We've talked at length about whether to join accounts. I dunno. I'm really independent and like having my own stuff, but I don't know that that will work very well once we buy a house together and really are fully sharing all expenses. That may be when we finally join everything.
  • was doing the whole have 2 separate personal accounts and one joint account for bills and transfering money in for bills mortagage etc then separate accounts for weddings saving and expences this was working great!!then last month started geting paid in new job into the joint account to avail of higher intrest rates less fees and so on but it is a nightmare have to justify spending and balance account correctly to ensure that i haven't spent too much and bills are paid i hate it changing back next month
  • razzle - I dunno what you mean exactly? If you have 1 joint account you can both draw from it & shouldn't need to ask permission as long as you are not out spending ALL the money lol. I'm not worried about me FI going crazy now that everything will be joint -- he & I always lived comfortably but not extravegantly so i don't think his name on my acct. will change that.
  • We've completely merged everything for about 3 years now. No seperate personal spending accounts, no seperate credit cards. Everything is merged, neither of us sees the point of having seperate accounts... He's also my beneficiary for everything...along with my mom & siblings of course! =)
  • FI and I have our own separate Checking Accounts, I have a  personal savings that I don't use, I also have a long term savings that is in my name. And then we have the "wedding fund" savings which is in both our names. Only so we can both transfer money to it.#1 reason people get divorced (IMO) money, why chance it? As it stands now....if I need $ I just tell him and he gives it no questions asked, same with him telling me.....We keep it separate to give us 1 less reason to argue. As it stands we have done this for 4 years and in 4 years we have fought/argued twice...not a bad track record if you ask me. (fights were about other stuff anyways).So we will keep it this way.....I think it is a personal thing. My MOH said that when she is married she will have a joint one and was almost offended that I was not doing the same. W/e works for each couple. :-)
    BabyFetus Ticker
  • We have everything as one. I moved from another state and I has a small credit union in Cali. We have a shared everything. It wirks for us. I know friends that have there own seperate accounts and that works for them. but form my Fi and I we like having everything as one.
  • I'm going to keep my separate account when we are married, I'll wait until we get married and names changed (he's getting his name changed as well to stepdad's last) to go joint. He's been my beneficiary for two years :) My mom always had her separate accounts as a 'savings' of sorts for family vacations, home upgrades, etc. and that's probably how mine will be.
  • razzle - I dunno what you mean exactly? If you have 1 joint account you can both draw from it & shouldn't need to ask permission as long as you are not out spending ALL the money lol. -------We will create a new joint account that our paychecks and finances will go into.  Once a month we will each put $1,000 (or some number) into our own personal accounts.  This way we can each make our own purchases and not feel bad about spending too much from our joint account.  This is a system that my sister and brother-in-law do and it works well for them, and makes sense to me.
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