DC

inviting work people

Hi all, So, I just started working at my current job (end of July), and our wedding is Nov 1st. I was doing a fellowship at the same location (part time) last year, but didn't really have a lot of contact with most people that I'm currently working with. I'm working in a hospital and its very gossipy. We're going back and forth on whether I should invite everyone from work (at least 30 more people). So here are the questions: 1. At this point I'm leaning toward only inviting those that I worked with regularly last year, and not invite those that I work with now regularly. But this includes one guy who is now one of my bosses, though I don't want to invite the other bosses because I don't really know them. 2. I figure if someone asks about the wedding, I can just tell them that there was a limited budget and I wish I could have invited more. What does everyone think? We were thinking about inviting everyone to the ceremony but then thought that may be tacky when everyone leaves to go to the party and some weren't invited. Thanks

Re: inviting work people

  • tidetraveltidetravel member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Don't mix business w/ personal life. Only invite coworkers if they are people that you associate with outside of work or you have a very close working relationship. Send the invites to their house, not work, and try not to discuss the wedding around coworkers that aren't invited. Keep in mind that if you invite coworkers, you need to invite their significant others too (spouses, fiance's, anyone living together, or in LTR are considered "social units" and cannot be invited seperately), so your list could get very long DO NOT send invites to just the ceremony. Its rude.
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  • edited December 2011
    Thanks for the advice... this helps. I think I'll take that one guy I had on my list off the list, and invite the others that I've had dinner and drinks with outside the work place. Now, my only problem is not talking about the wedding at work. Almost everyone asks me about it, just randomly, sometimes I don't even know what they're talking about ("so it's coming up" and I'm like, what's coming up). They all know I'm getting married because I had to take time off for the wedding/honeymoon. Any suggestions? I don't want to be rude and say I can't talk about it. usually I answer the question and move the conversation along.
  • edited December 2011
    Agreed, only invite coworkers if you would hang out with them out of the office/feel very close to them.  I wouldn't talk to much about the wedding to non-invited co-workers.  But I doubt people will be offended if they aren't invited. 
  • edited December 2011
    I think answering their questions in a very basic fashion w/o going into detail is fine. I had people at work ask me about it all the time and they threw me a little shower. They made it clear they didnt expect to be invited. People are probably just trying to make conversation by asking you about it.
  • edited December 2011
    I'm not inviting anyone from work. There are a couple of people that I have hung out with outside of work, but I'm not even inviting them. I don't think it's necessary to invite any coworkers to your wedding unless you are particularly close to them.
  • edited December 2011
    if your work place is very gossipy, I would skip the drama and not invite anyone from work. That is JMO. If people are petty enough to gossip and cause drama anyway, they won't understand why they weren't invited and some coworkers were. I work in an office with 9 coworkers, but once you include their spouses, thats +18. I REALLY want to invite one of my coworkers, but after the wedding I feel like I will never live it down from everyone else.
  • edited December 2011
    I have the same dilemma - but I decided that I am only inviting those who I hang out with outside of work now (I've been here for ten years and groups have come and gone). Like you, EVERYONE asks about it - I don't even talk about it at work. Usually my standard response is that things are going well, and that I wish I could invite more people, but that it will be very small, and not everyone that I wish I could invite is being invited. That way, when people aren't invited, at least they will have been forewarned!
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