Too bossy about dresses?

NuggetBrain · September 2009

Also, Maid, you're wrong. Again. If my mom, FMIL, best friend, the minister, Oprah or Mary herself showed up at my wedding in the same dress I was wearing somebody would be going home beat to sh*t. And that someone would not be me.

ffmaid · September 2009

If you threw a fit at asome elses attire you are rude. Now in some cases you might choose to be rude but in reality you have no say in what others wear unless you wnat to be rude yourself.

ffmaid · September 2009

By the way there is a big difference between you should not wear white or black( in some families) to a wedding which I believe you shoudl follow according to ettiquette and saying that you have any right to tell someone else that they can not wear something. Yes it would be tacky as all get out for someone to show up looking like the bride at a wedding or wearing white. But nobody else has any right to tell another adult they can not do so. It is rude to comment on others ettiquette breaches just as it is rude to dress inappropriately.

temerityjane · September 2009

ffmaid - Fine. Call me rude.I hearby declare myself TJ, THE RUDEST BIITCH ON PE.Because you bet your a$$ I will, if necessary, flat out tell my mother to march that white dress right back to the store.Of course, my mother would never even dream of doing something so hurtful (and yes - it IS hurtful. Everyone is aware of that etiquette rule and to ignore it smacks of trying to upstage the bride, and that IS hurtful), so I won't worry about that myself.But godd@mn ffmaid, I know that P&E often devolves into a "I am a chiller bride than thou" routine ...("I don't care who wears white, it's no big deal!" "Oh yeah? Well I only asked my bridesmaids to spend $8 each!" "Psh, $8? Bridezilla. I actually got married laying in my robe on the couch, that's how chill I am and how little wedding details actually matter!")... but you're off your nut.

NuggetBrain · September 2009

If you threw a fit at asome elses attire you are rude. Now in some cases you might choose to be rude but in reality you have no say in what others wear unless you wnat to be rude yourself. WRONG. I don't understand how a person can go through life being so wrong all the time. If my FMIL planned to wear the same dress as I was to my wedding, I wouldn't even have to say anything to her because Noodle would be on the phone and "WTF??" in .5 seconds after finding out. But apparently it's okay to come to your wedding in your wedding dress, or assless chaps, or nipple cones and a G-string because, God forbid, someone go tell you to PUT SOME DAMN CLOTHES ON since that's rude.

[Deleted User] · September 2009

My WP is wearing black dresses and so is my mom & probably MIL. I see nothing wrong there.

sarah0725 · September 2009

TJ, I love your assessment of P&E's chill bride pissing contests.Sometimes I wanna go, "Oh yeah?? Well I first started thinking about my wedding when I was SIXTEEN!!! WAAAAAHHH!"

elisab81 · September 2009

in my opinion its totally up to you. i had minor color requirements and people could call me bossy, picky whatever...i didnt care! i dont think mothers should wear black....personal opinion.take what you want from the responses you got, but if it upsets you then say something. say you realize that maybe you are being over-sensitive about the colors, but had she ever thought of "blank" color.good luck!

NuggetBrain · September 2009

But TJ, some brides really are just chill. About certain things, at least. I know I myself will be that bride that hands out timelines to everybody the night before the wedding.

tlv204 · September 2009

I know that P&E often devolves into a "I am a chiller bride than thou" routine ...("I don't care who wears white, it's no big deal!" "Oh yeah? Well I only asked my bridesmaids to spend $8 each!" "Psh, $8? Bridezilla. I actually got married laying in my robe on the couch, that's how chill I am and how little wedding details actually matter!")Ha, definitely.

MissSarah786 · September 2009

("I don't care who wears white, it's no big deal!" "Oh yeah? Well I only asked my bridesmaids to spend $8 each!" "Psh, $8? Bridezilla. I actually got married laying in my robe on the couch, that's how chill I am and how little wedding details actually matter!")Jane, truly quote worthy P&E gold. I love this.

ffmaid · September 2009

temerity- I'm sorry you are mad at my example which was just that an example of an extreme. People come here and complain about guests attire all the time. Yes it is rude of guests to come in incorrect attire to an event and yes I woudl be upset if they did it to me but that does not give anyone a pass to tell another adult that they can not wear something. Sorry you think that is too chill. But in the end what matters is that they are there for you and celabrating you and your dh and how wonderful your marriage is. YES it is rude to show up in wrong attire but if they do so that is their choice. FYI my mom wore silver/grey and my mil wore this monstrosity that looked out of the 1980's in paisley but they were both happy for us.

temerityjane · September 2009

NuggetBrain - I am, what I would think, is a reasonably chill bride. I'm not making outlandish demands of anyone, but I know what I want and things DO matter to me.I wish half of P&E knew how ridiculous they sounded when get started with the "I was the least Bridezilla-y bride ever" shiit.BULLETIN: In most cases, for the average non-insane person: IT IS NOT WRONG TO WANT WHAT YOU WANT FOR YOUR WEDDING. DO NOT LISTEN WHEN THESE WOMEN TRY TO "OUT-COOL" EACH OTHER WITH THEIR AMAZING LAID-BACK-ED-NESS.

eastunder1 · September 2009

Maybe look at it from a different angle? Maybe she is just trying to coordinate with the colors of the wedding in an effort to "fit?" Maybe she thought you would be pleased? I swear, people can't win with brides. They b*tch if the dresses are weird non coordinating colors and they b*tch if they match too much. Maybe it's just a dress. I think the only leg one has to stand on when complaining about other people's dresses is if they are all white, because that is just thoughtless manners. Since that is not the case, your best bet would just be to let it go. I bet when your pictures come back, you will like how well she "goes" with everything else.

temerityjane · September 2009

ffmaid - I'm not mad at you, I just think you're being absolutely ridiculous. If someone told me they were going to wear a replica of my exact dress to my wedding, I would say "You better fuucking not" so fast my tongue would slap them across the head.

lyndausvi · September 2009

Can I ask how it matters? The woman walks down the aisle, sits, walks back out and is in a few pictures. Not unlike most of the other guests at the wedding that you do not have totally control over their outfits.I'm looking at my wedding pictures now and there was a lot of black with a little bit of white outfits out there. Why focus on the MOG?

tlv204 · September 2009

I swear, people can't win with brides. They b*tch if the dresses are weird non coordinating colors and they b*tch if they match too much. Maybe it's just a dress.100% ditto, that's what I was trying to say. She probably really does think she's doing well to match, and honestly it will look great in pictures. What else would you want her to wear?

sarah0725 · September 2009

My SIL's mom wore white to my SIL and brother's wedding. Sometimes I wonder what that was all about. Pretty bad when the MOB does it, right?

ffmaid · September 2009

temerity- I would be suggesting some other color too. But if they just showed up in white I would not flip out. One of the GM brought an uninvited tramp of the week who was in a long white dress. Yeah why exactly would she wear this? No idea. Anyway I barely noticed and when I did I did not flip I laughed at the trampy girls that gm tends to pick. So uninvited random add on day of in long white gown( admittedly had gold trim but wellbridal esq)

buttaflai · September 2009

I have a crush on TJ.

Too bossy about dresses?

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