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Texas-Dallas and Ft. Worth
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Difficult Situation Part 2: WWYD?

fallbride1109fallbride1109 member
5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
in Texas-Dallas and Ft. Worth
I'll try and make this as short as I can.  MOH/Sister was in charge of my girls' night out.  It's all she's talked about since I got engaged.Fast forward to 2 months before the wedding:  2 co-workers and good friends want to throw me a lingerie shower (which they knew I wanted) so I said, let's make it part of my GNO.  Talk to my sister, here is her info.  Don't do anything without talking to her.Next thing you know, MOH/sister gets the invitation in the mail on Saturday and my co-workers' names are on there as hosts.  She is heartbroken as am I.  I don't know why they would purposely do this.  One of them has said, she told the other one, hey take my name off, talk to her sister first, etc.  And I believe her, I've known her for 10 years.The other co-worker is very passive/aggressive and can make my life miserable here if I cross her.  I don't know what to do.  I need help.
Planning the Meal
With All the Trimmings
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Re: Difficult Situation Part 2: WWYD?

  • SarahandAlex2010SarahandAlex2010 member
    Tenth Anniversary 500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Oh no! I am so sorry your going through this! Thats a difficult situation to be in. I would have them seperate. Unless the invitation says bachelorette party as well. If it was me, I would avoid the drama at work and have them seperate. Let the coworker have your lingerie party and than invite them to your bachelorette party if you wanted too. That way your sister is still having your bach. party. I know how it is and I was in the same situation for my baby shower.
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  • TCUESW1999TCUESW1999 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Can you keep the work shower seperate from the gno?
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  • fallbride1109fallbride1109 member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    No, it's one in the same.  Same day, we've already reserved the room, etc. 
    Planning the Meal
    With All the Trimmings
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  • TCUESW1999TCUESW1999 member
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Wow. Ok. Is there a possible way to "play dumb" and say something like "oh, I think you forgot my sister's name on the invites" and see what the co-worker says? I don't know, I hate drama and being confrontational however lately I find that if something annoys me, then I call it out as opposed to letting it go. Probably not a good thing but I can't help it. I can't wait till the wedding is over.
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  • Tiffany618Tiffany618
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Hmm ... is the invitation for GNO or just for the shower?   If the invitations they sent take credit for the GNO then I think a confrontation is definitely in order.  If not, perhaps send a different invite for the GNO with only your sister listed as a host?  How did the co-workers get the list of people you wanted to invite?
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  • fallbride1109fallbride1109 member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    Well, they had the list because they knew I was only inviting people from work and I gave them all my sister's info.  The co-worker asked me, who from work are you inviting, and I told her, etc.
    Planning the Meal
    With All the Trimmings
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  • Mariah&StevenMariah&Steven
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    How did the co-workers get the list of people you wanted to invite? Ditto.  I'd also have to say that a confrontation is in order.  I'm sorry but that's not right of your co-worker to take credit for something your sister mostly planned. 
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  • Tiffany618Tiffany618
    2500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I'd definitely confront the coworker then.  If it will really cause you trouble at work though, perhaps you could propose a toast at the girl's night to recognize your sister's hard work to make the evening perfect for you. I'm really sorry about the situation you are in.  I know it is tough.
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  • shortgirltxshortgirltx
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Sorry you are in this position.  As much as you don't want to do this, I say you should confront her, act stupid if need be.  However, if you don't there's a few options:-have the party combined and go about business like you are now but do a toast to your sister and make it all about her, how she's put so much effort into the party, etc. (passive aggressive slap in the face, which I would love to do to your co-worker right now!)-Have your sister throw another one on a different date and don't invite this chick.  Don't know how easy this would be if she's already put down deposits and all.  Plenty of people have more than one shower/party. 
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  • fallbride1109fallbride1109 member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 5 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    Thanks guys.  I know you are right, I have to confront her.  I'll just have to do it as tactfully as possible I guess. 
    Planning the Meal
    With All the Trimmings
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  • JustinandLindsay2009JustinandLindsay2009
    500 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Sorry Steph! This sucks and it's not right. I hope it all works out as good as it can for you :(
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  • JessTXJessTX
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011
    WOW! This sucks! People amaze me. Because its work it is extra sticky. Maybe your sister could send a follow up email/reminder and sign it as the host or something to loop her into it? Hopefully your sister understands this was not your doing at all and while it sucks and all are disappointd about it, she can accept it as other people's bad behavior and deal with it as best as possible for your sake. I don't know- I don't think I have great advice for you here- sorry. Let us know how it goes. good luck.
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