Gay Weddings

Its sad some people are still behind the times...!

so today I have been calling places to try and secure a videographer for our wedding. We had one company in mind, but I thought we should have a back up just in case. Well I found this company on-line and decided to give them a call. First time I called there was no answer so I left a message, then proceeded to send them an message via their "contact us page". A few minutes later I got a call back from the wife, (they are a husband and wife team). I explained to her briefly what we were looking for, and at first she was very friendly and excited to assist. then I further explained that this would be a same sex wedding, and suddenly she was silent. The next words she uttered out of her mouth were the standard..."I am not judgmental or anything...but I will have to speak w/ my husband." I was shocked! She then went on to say that she wanted us to have the best experience but was not sure it they could do it, and that once she spoke w/ her husband she would get back to me, but she was not going to commit to working with us! Once I was able to hold back my ANGER and IRRITATION at her ignorance. I politely told her that I could sense her hesitation, and with that said there was no need to speak w/ her husband, as it was clear that they were NOT the type of people nor company we would like to do business with, and hung up! It still shocks me that there are still companies out there that would operate this way, especially in this economy I am sure that people arent knocking down their door to pay 2K for a wedding video! Our money is just as green as any straight couples! It just makes me so angry! Thanks for letting me vent!

Re: Its sad some people are still behind the times...!

  • mattmikemattmike member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I am sorry for your experience and I am sure many same-sex couples that decide to marry face the same challenges soon or later. We are still a year away from our wedding date and thus have not started the gritty planning details; however, there have been a few wedding/reception venues that do not return my calls or emails! I tell them right away that this will be a same-sex wedding and I have a strong feeling that those venues that do not contact me back do not want to deal with us. However, we are looking at a venue this Saturday where the coordinator seemed very excited to work with us from her initial email. So I wouldn't be too hurt by someone not wanted to work with you... bring your money elsewhere. It is a companies loss if they do not want to take your money.
  • 2dBride2dBride member
    2500 Comments Fourth Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    I'm so sorry you are facing this!  We have been lucky that we have not had a single hostile reaction to our being a same-sex couple in all the time we have been planning.  Indeed, our biggest roadblock was not our gender, but the fact that some rabbis did not want to deal with us because my FI is not Jewish.  However, our photographer told us that he has dealt with some same-sex couples who came to him after being turned down by other photographers--and that is in MA, where you would think people would have wised up by now.
  • pdeannawpdeannaw member
    10 Comments
    edited December 2011
    I have had one problem...I called a bridal shop to set up an appointment for the both of us to try on dresses. At first I didn't say anything just I need two appointments when the lady questioned me on two brides getting married on the same day I told her we were marrying eachother and she laughed at me! She made a comment that I didn't say that early in the conversation. But I didn't feel like I needed to. Then when we went in the saleslady was so rude to us. It sucks but luckily there are so many other places to buy a dress from.
  • edited December 2011
    I'm so sorry... I bet she'll miss that 2k!
  • edited December 2011
    First off, let me say that I am very sorry for the rude way in which you were treated. My fiance and I are in the beginning stages of planning, and honestly have had good responses from vendors when we tell them that we are a same sex couple. I feel it best to let vendors know this first and foremost, for the same reasons as you. Also, we like to see how they respond, and then make the decision whether or not we feel comfortable with continuing on with a conversation given their response. With that being said, don't give up. Vendors are working with more and more same sex couples nowadays, so you may actually find some very friendly people out there. Remember, there is always the Better Business Bureau for those who are down right discriminatory! Happy planning.
    PK Trying to Conceive Ticker
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