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September 2010 Weddings

Assigned seating or not?

I'm curious who is doing assigned seating and who is not?  I am in a wedding on Saturday for one of my good friends and she is not doing assigned seating.  I know she invited about 225 people and I just thought it was crazy (though I didn't tell her that) that there wouldn't be assigned seating for that many potential guests.  I'm not sure what her final number was, but it just seems different to me. I mentioned to FI last night that we would have to do the seating arrangements and he was like, seriously?  We are going to tell people where to sit?!  I was kind of dumb-founded at that point!!  (I did reply with yes though!!!)

Re: Assigned seating or not?

  • We will either be doing assigned seating or assigned tables.  I think that completely unassigned free-for-all leads to that icky first-day-of-school-in-the-cafeteria feeling, plus people will probably be moving chairs all around to accommodate different-sized groups, which could lead to tripping and general annoyance for the servers.If you had a group that ALL knew each other, maybe no assigning would be ok.  But I would worry that people would get left out and end up sitting with a group that would leave them bored all night, plus I would have a mini-anxiety attack if I walked into a wedding and had to choose my own seat.
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  • I've never actually been to a wedding with assigned seating. As a guest I like to be able to sit where I chose and not have to be "forcing" conversation with random strangers. All the wedding I've been to have had reserved seating close to the bridal party for immediate family. I guess assigned seating could be handy if you were letting guests chose the menu. Those are just my 2 cents.
  • I don't understand how people can not have a seating plan. In theory, there are only enough chairs for those attending. So crazy Suzy from college could end up sitting next to great aunt Edna for dinner because it is the only chair available? Or do the no-seating-plan people have extra tables for stragglers, and pay for extra linens and centerpieces?Seating plans make everything easy. guests come in, and go to their table without milling around feeling like the new kid at school looking for a place to sit in the cafeteria at lunch. Usually the guests at least have something in common with their tablemates. Everyone is accomadated, and dinner is less awkward. Yay.I do think that brides who dictate where people sit at the tables (joe sits in seat one, jane sits in seat two, etc.) are going overboard.
  • we are either doing assigned tables or at very least reserving a few tables for specific people.. probably assigned table because i found a killer escort card idea that matches my theme wonderfully. haha good reason right?
  • I think we are just going to do assigned tables. LOL love the post kcody about the matching cards!!
  • I do think it is necessary for all of the reasons above, but I am absolutely not looking forward to making those decisions since I know I can't please everyone.
  • We're doing assigned tables. Obviously I'll need help with FI's side, but I know that there are probably some people who don't want to sit with/near other people. To lessen confusion we'll just do the tables.
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  • It sounds all well & good, but in my opinion the only thing that can come out of unassigned seating is mass confusion & craziness. Not to mention you'll waste a LOT of time.
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  • We are definitely doing assigned tables. I'd hate to have the guests trying to rush in to save seats for people. We had to do that at a wedding and it ended up being much too crunched, since we had to grab more chairs. The only thing people really sit for is to eat anyway. And we basically know who to put together and who to not put together.
  • My family doesn't understand it, but we're having assigned tables. I'm on a budget and I can't afford to have extra tables and chairs for the chaos that would ensue. We'll have 275-300 guests and I know things would get messy. People will move around after dinner I'm sure, but this makes it easier for the venue and for the guests who may now know everyone.
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  • So, I haven't had a chance to get back on this until now, but I'm glad to see most people are where I am.  I don't like being told where to sit or who to sit with, but I also know that when that's the case, someone has put thought into who I am sitting with and if I'll get along with them.  I agree, I see mass confusion going on with big weddings if you don't assign tables.  That's what my plan is, assigned tables, not particular seats.  It's one thing I just don't want to have to stress about.  I don't want people to be able to move their chairs to a table because they want to sit with someone.  If you want to be with them, get on the dance floor!  (Just my thought!)
  • I never went to a wedding where it was a free-for all. Ive always been okay with the assigned tables. It makes it easier and less stressful for the guest to be told where to go and then sit wherever they want at the table with their SO
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  • I actually don't understand this whole "I don't like being told where to sit/who to sit with mentality" at all.  Not to be rude, it just doesn't make sense to me.  Hopefully the B&G put enough thought into it so that you're not sitting with people you hate, or a bunch of little kids or elderly people that you have nothing in common with.  I would MUCH rather be given a table, and be able to go straight there, rather than worrying about where there is room for me and FI next to each other, and possible even more seats than that if there are also other good friends in attendance.  I trust the B&G to make thoughtful choices; I know it will be a PITA for us when we're making these decisions, but I think it's completely worth it.  And for a large wedding, I really can't understand a free-for-all in the least.  It seems like it would be chaotic and it would take forever for everyone to get seated.  The only time this seems acceptable to me is those weddings where people have stations with tall tables scattered around, and the guests just sort of mill around and never actually sit and eat (except a few tables for older guests).
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