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August 2012 Weddings
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Father/Daughter & Mother/Son Dances

VNEluvsAJBVNEluvsAJB member
First Comment
in August 2012 Weddings

I need some advice about how to handle these dances. My father isn't in my life and it is a very sensitive subject for me. I'm not planning to invite my father and my grandfather is too ill to attend therefore I won't be doing a father/daughter dance. My question is will it be odd to just do a mother/son dance. I think my futher MIL would like to do the dance and I don't want to take that from her or FI.

My question is: If you were a guest at a wedding and there was only a mother/son dance without the father/daughter would you think it was weird? Any suggestions on how to deal with the situation to make it less odd?

Thanks ladies.

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Re: Father/Daughter & Mother/Son Dances

  • Laceylu05Laceylu05 member
    First Comment
    I say do what you want to do!!!!  I went to a wedding and there was a father daughter dance only because the grooms mom was too drunk to stay and do the mother son dance!!  It was awful!!  Good luck...remember its YOUR day!!!!!
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  • rungirl12rungirl12 member
    First Comment First Anniversary
    I would suggest either only doing the mother/son (I have been to many weddings where they only do the father/daughter, so same diff).  Or, join your FI & his mother and dance with your mother too during that time.  I would make sure the mother/son dance is important because you might be able to just scrap the whole thing if it's not important to your fi or his mother.  Ask!Laughing
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  • FLsweetpea1979FLsweetpea1979
    First Comment
    I won't be having a Father/ Daughter dance either (my dad passed away several years ago).  My FI and I decided together not to have any other "special" dances (besides our first dance!), just so the fact that there isn't a father/ daughter dance isn't obvious and neither one of us feels uncomfortable on that day. He has already promised to save his mom at least one dance throughout the night! That said, it is completely up to you, your FI and his mom...I certainly don't feel that anyone will think that whatever ya'all decide will be weird.
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    image229 Invited
    image134 Have their dancing shoes ready!
    image95 Will be sitting this one out.
    image0 Undecided

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  • AjoydAjoyd member
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    I agree with PPs. Your guests know you and therefore probably know that you aren't close with your father and will probably assume that is why there is no father/daughter dance.

    If it is important to your FI/his mother to have a special dance, go for it. I think it would be nice if you danced with your mom during that time but it would also be fine if you sat it out!
    Married my love 8-25-12 TTC #1 since September 2012. BFP 2-2-13. photo 455d4bc3-3623-4c16-8dd1-1fbc7e99e147.jpg BabyFruit Ticker My BFP Chart
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  • bmetz34bmetz34 member
    First Comment
    I would have your FI check with his mom and see if she cares.  If she's indifferent, maybe you can do something to honor both of your moms another way, like giving them each a rose during the ceremony.  If she does want to do it, I say pick a song that works for everyone, and join in with your mom and do the song with all 4 of you together.  Honestly, I think the guests would be happier with fewer dances that interrupt eating or dancing. 
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  • jesslimaxjesslimax
    First Comment

    I'm sort of in a similar situation. I am not on good terms with my father either and am not planning on involving him in anyway in the wedding. He is invited as a guest and will just show up and that's it. So, I might be doing a mother/daughter dance and then my FI will do a mother/son dance. Actually, I was considering skipping the dances altogether. Either way, it's your wedding so you can do what you'd like! :)

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