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Stealing program wording...is this weird?

stahlopstahlop member
First Comment
in Jewish Weddings
So, I know we have to put a lot into our programs to explain traditions, but I recently went to a friends wedding and noticed that she stole, verbatim, the program that another friend used in her wedding.  It looks like all she did is change the names.  She even put traditions in there that they didn't use in the ceremony or reception.  I understand borrowing ideas, but has anyone seen this before.  The weirdest part, the bride she stole it from was at the wedding, and that bride's sister was part of the bridal party, so it's not like anyone wouldn't notice.  Am I the only one that thinks this is weird?
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Re: Stealing program wording...is this weird?

  • RachiemooRachiemoo member
    First Anniversary First Comment Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    i think it is weird to do it without asking. a similiar situation happened to me where i was attending a friend's wedding and she copied some parts from my program and she hadn't asked to. she did give me credit in her program though with a footnote! i don't think its strange to borrow ideas or use other programs as inspiration, but it would be nice to ask first, especially when quoting vertbatim.
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  • tenofcups4metenofcups4me member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    What makes you think she "stole" it without asking the other bride if she could use it? I find it very weird that someone would include explanation of traditions that they didn't use. I don't find it so odd that they'd want to use the explanations that someone else had already written up since so many people really can't write at all. Common courtesy would require at least asking the couple if it's ok though.
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  • BenandDinaBenandDina
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    It sounds like she definitely used another friend's template, but I don't know if I'd call that stealing outright unless you know for a fact that she specifically didn't ask the first bride's permission.  If she didn't, then, it's definitely weird and inappropriate, as the courteous thing to do would have been to ask.  But, people do wacky things.
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  • goldgoldgoldgold
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Strange if she didn't ask for permission. I took inspiration from a few different programs my mom/her friends collected. I used bits and pieces I liked from each, but made it our own. Also, none of these people will be at my wedding.
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  • slbriz34slbriz34
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    That many of the items put in her program were not done leads one to believe that a lot of creative "borrowing" was done.  But you don't know if she didn't ask permission; if no one else has mentioned it, particularly the other bride and her sister, then it might be that she did. If anything, she looks a bit silly for adding so many things and not doing them.  As far the "borrowing" part, lots of the wording of the traditions can be found on so many websites - at some points it becomes a bit difficult to reword things so as to not make it seem like it was just copied verbatim. I got a few programs from fellow knotties and found examples online and tried my best to be creative where I could - but it wasn't easy to do so in lots of areas, but I wouldn't say that I "stole" someone's work.  It's very hard to steal Jewish traditions in that sense. What's done is done; the only person that should feel slighted is the other bride and if she didn't, then it's not a big deal.  Besides, isn't copying the sincerest form of flattery?!  :-)  Happy Hump Day!
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  • silversparkssilversparks member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    It does sound weird. Most bizarre is that the program had traditions they didn't use... makes me wonder if maybe someone other than the bride made the program (i.e. bride's sister was like "X had such a great program, if you want me to, I'll ask if we can use hers and I'll make the changes for you" and then bride and sister have communication snafu about the changes...)
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  • Rebecca TorielloRebecca Toriello member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I asked the girls  on the knot for their programs, and they halped me, so i could make one of my own. We have many of our guest who are Jewish, but they have no clue about  the ceremony and formal names etc.
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  • stahlopstahlop member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I know she didn't ask because the bride she 'borrowed' from was at the wedding.  The funny thing though is that she didn't notice it was the same until we pointed it out to her.  I just thought it was weird considering she had many of the same people at her wedding as the other one.
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