Just Engaged and Proposals

Learning to be patient!

My boyfriend and I have been talking about getting married for a few months now. The 21st was our 9 months. Yes we have only been dating 9 months, its one of those relationships where you just know this is who you want to be with forever. Anyways it was early in the morning and we drove past a the jewelry store. He said, "darn they are closed" I took and quick look and said who is closed? He said the jewelry store. I said what the hell did you want to go to the jewelry store for. He replied with, to get you a ring silly. He was ready right then and there to pop the question! We've been wanting to wait till our 1 year but neither of us can hardly wait anymore. So a few days later we went and looked at the rings that he had picked out. He had picked out the perfect ring! We picked out the dimond, sized it, and it would be ready in a few days.

The day came and it was ready to be picked up there was some comfusion between the two of us on who should pick it up. He ended up leaving work to go and get it (I didnt find this out till later) Anyways he thought he had pissed me off and he hadnt, and I thought he was going to pop the question right away. He was ready on the spot a few days ago so why not right? Well he didnt and its been about a week and its driving me nuts! When we went to go pick them out I asked if it was selfish of me to want it for thanksgiving so that I can show it off to my 93 yr old grandpa who was coming over to help celerate our first thinksgiving in our new house. He said no not at all.  Well he took that as I wanted to show it off in the box... HOPES UP and back down.

How have the rest of you handled the long wait knowing he has the ring. Oh and the ring is soooo sitting on his desk. So every time I walk past his desk I see it and imagine it on my finger. I really dont care much about the ring thats just an added bonus. I JUST WANT HIM TO ASK ME ALREADY!

Re: Learning to be patient!

  • Have you checked out the Not Engaged Yet board? They might be better suited.
  • chances are....he's probably waiting for the right time. My boyfriend and I are in sort of the same boat. I'm so ready to have my ring and he says it's important to him that everything is special and that he gets to ask me in "the right way" even though I know he's going to propose. Believe it or not, guys can be weird about those things. My boyfriend never is a typical "man's man" but there are some things that mean alot to him. Your guy probably just wants the "suprise reaction when he gets down on one knee cause that's what they always picture. I wouldn't be suprised if he has some sort of special thing planned to ask you. I know its hard and us girls are like "i dont care!!! i just want to be engaged to you" lol. I'm sure you've already been planning parts of your wedding when he's not looking. But, just keep being patient. You know it's coming and he wants part of it to be a suprise. And obviously he loves you otherwise he would have never got the ring. It'll happen.  Hope this helps.
  • Hey Hun,
    Don't worry about any rude comments people post on here! We are happy to have you on this board and to talk to you :) I personally was in a similar situation. I knew for over a year and a half that we were going to get married. He got the ring a week before he popped the question! He carried it with him everywhere, but I wasn't allowed to see it! It is killer! Treasure the excitement and the anxious thoughts! They are something you will look back on fondly. I got engaged Sunday and it was the best night of my life. When he chooses the right time you will be overjoyed! Just sit back and let him be creative! You won't regret it! Make sure you update us on how he did it! Good luck and hang in there!
  • you could just ask him, girl! this IS the 21st century. ;)  
    i asked my boyfriend and it went fabulously. we couldn't be happier. when you're guy can't work up the nerve to do it but you both know if it's a set deal, you just need to take the initiative! you're entering a partnership right?
  • Um, I wasn't being rude, I was just letting her know there is a whole board dedicated to girls who are waiting for a proposal and could identify with her even better.
  • Someday, you'll look back on your anxiety about this and laugh. It all feels huge as you're going through it, but trust me when I say that you should relax and enjoy how things play out.

    Once your wedding has come and gone, it's a whole different ballgame.
  • Just relax.  He'll do it when he's ready and you'll be engaged and happy.  The more you worry about it, the less it's going to mean when it happens.
  • We had picked out our ring and he ended up waiting a month and a half! It was kind of a game for awhile. We would joke back and forth that a certain moment that had just passed would have been the perfect time.  It was funny...when it actually happened, I thought he was just joking with me! Just be patient girl, you don't want to rush him...he's just waiting for the perfect moment, or even a moment that he can catch you off guard just like mine did for me!
  • I understand where you are coming from. Our 9 month was on the 20th! And he bought my ring in September and has been keeping it in his safe deposit box at the bank ever since. I have no idea what it looks like. It has been difficult waiting. I have had a couple of meltdowns when he starts teasing me about how long he is going to hold on to it. We even have our wedding date picked out and are starting to plan the honeymoon. We have discussed it and I know that he is planning a day long event for our engagement. (He's taking me to Disney World for my birthday 15 days after Christmas, hmmmm could that be it?) But what my sweetie keeps telling me is that he knows this is going to be the story I tell for the rest of my life, and he wants it to be amazing. So I will wait patiently. Each day that passes means you are one day closer.
  • Just don't think that every dinner out or special moment from now on will be "the moment". Otherwise you'll spend the next few months constantly being disappointed and that'll take away from it when it happens. Put it out of your mind, maybe distract yourself with oogling dresses or shoes or something fun. He'll do it when he's ready. Especially since he knows you're ready. Don't wish time away, it's precious.
  • my fi had my ring for a month before i got it and we dated for 6 before he asked , just dont worry
  • It is tough, and we've all been there, and the best advice I can say to you is once you are engaged you won't care about how long it took. It's not much help now I know, but at least you know he has the ring and he's wanting to propose to you, that's so much more than most girls.

    Also focus on that he probably wants the proposal to be special, and wouldn't you rather say "he planned the whole thing out and asked me at ______ and said ________ and it was all so romantic" rather than it being because you were in a rush.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
  • I say enjoy the anticipation because you'll be flaunting your ring sooner than you know! You'll also be stressing out over planning soon as well! haha I knew my FI had my ring for awhile, even though he didn't tell me straight out-he just dropped hints here and there, being secret about where he was simply stating he was running errands, or he had to go pick something up-etc.
    And don't worry about the whole year mark-he's going to catch you off guard! My FI proposed after 6 months and I thought for sure he was going to wait out the year or for a special occasion. Your proposal day will be THEE special day, no worries :)
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