Not Engaged Yet

New from Tennessee

Hello I have seen your board several times but I would like to introduce myself. I have been with my SO for 2 years full but off and on since 2007. We have a beautiful 2 year old son and I have an 11 year old from my first marriage. We are not engaged yet but I am almost at my breaking point. I know I should not feel this way but I do. I have been the ride or die chick for so long but I am getting to my breaking point. So I have a date in my head that is my limit. Dominick has told me so many times that we would get engaged ( last December, wait til June, wait till he goes back to work ) I keep hearing the same thing but nothing happens. June will be over in 3 days and then I have to either stand my ground or get off the bus. I guess that is my beginning. What would you do? I love him more than words but I can not deal with the false promises.

Re: New from Tennessee

  • Hi, neighbor.

    Have an honest heart-to-heart with him. We don't know the dynamics of your relationship. 

    Honest conversation, clear wants/needs, be open, and listen to his concerns. Make sure he knows where you are, but respect his reservations.
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  • Hi Kentuckty ,

    I used to live in Clarksville and went the APSU before I met my ex-husband. He was ARMY.

    I have had the open converstion but, it is like it goes in one ear and out the other. Our relationship is somewhat complicated. When I was pregnant with our son he had a daughter on the way. So I was pregnant while his ex was pregnant. We have been together since our son was born.  Not together for the pregnancy. Anyway I have to deal with his CRAZY daughters mom, but I would do anything for his daughter. I think I can honestly say that I have been beyond supportative. I guess I will do the last converstion.
  • Ok. That is complicated. Are you sure that's a situation you want to bind yourself to forever? Do you want to be with someone who allows your legitimate concerns go 'in one ear and out the other'? Would you feel as strongly about pushing marriage if there were no kids? (I'm very much against getting or staying married 'for the kids'.)
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  • Darn Kentucky you are 100% right. It is complicated. Kids do have a factor in this relationship. My best friends tell me my life is Springer. I do love him and I do want to be with him but I don't know. I have had this on my mind and spirit for the past 2 weeks. And I am always the one telling my friends how to fix everything.
  • I agree with Wrkn.  And OP, I think you know what you SHOULD do.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_new-from-tennessee?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:7ad4238b-2938-429a-90ae-efb5628fcd98Post:8d91083a-dbc1-412e-b154-c479da1963df">Re: New from Tennessee</a>:
    [QUOTE]Our relationship is somewhat complicated. When I was pregnant with our son he had a daughter on the way. So I was pregnant while his ex was pregnant.
    Posted by lovinglife1978[/QUOTE]
    Whoa.

    In the sentiment of my Clarksville-born boyfriend, this is unsurprising as it happened on base.

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_new-from-tennessee?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:7ad4238b-2938-429a-90ae-efb5628fcd98Post:39c67ef2-db85-4947-9b79-931e2349b82c">Re: New from Tennessee</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: New from Tennessee : Whoa. In the sentiment of my Clarksville-born boyfriend, this is unsurprising as it happened on base.
    Posted by ahstillwell[/QUOTE]



    Life can be so funny. I never thought it would happen to me.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_new-from-tennessee?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:7ad4238b-2938-429a-90ae-efb5628fcd98Post:15d98b75-c13f-4e8a-8610-4d486df9d0b8">Re: New from Tennessee</a>:
    [QUOTE]I agree with Wrkn.  And OP, I think you know what you SHOULD do.
    Posted by flygirlmeg[/QUOTE]



    I know what I should be but all I think about is all that I have out into this relationship.
  • I never told anybody anything about me other than my drama I work for the state and SO is a police officer I have 2 boys 11 and 2 No pets Working on my Masters Degree will be finished in 6 weeks Love to shop Anything else just ask I am an open book. Lol
  • Why do you feel like marriage is an important step right now?

    What do you think is holding bf back?

    What's your Masters in?

    Favorite carb?

    Do you feel like getting married will lessen the drama? I would expect baby-mamma-drama to expand upon nuptials. 

    Are you a UT fan? (Fair warning, this is a trick question.)
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_new-from-tennessee?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:7ad4238b-2938-429a-90ae-efb5628fcd98Post:f7c908c6-1eb2-4b18-8761-4cecbd79c82b">Re: New from Tennessee</a>:
    [QUOTE]Are you a UT fan? (Fair warning, this is a trick question.)
    Posted by Wrkn925[/QUOTE]
    GO DORES.

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_new-from-tennessee?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:7ad4238b-2938-429a-90ae-efb5628fcd98Post:ddaa16e5-df89-4c41-a90f-b3b18dc14fd9">Re: New from Tennessee</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: New from Tennessee : GO DORES.
    Posted by ahstillwell[/QUOTE]

    <div>Can I ask where you live? You can PM me if you don't want to say it publically.</div>
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_new-from-tennessee?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:7ad4238b-2938-429a-90ae-efb5628fcd98Post:716206ff-0a5a-4578-8a04-5b05aaf5c0e9">Re: New from Tennessee</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: New from Tennessee : Can I ask where you live? You can PM me if you don't want to say it publically.
    Posted by Wrkn925[/QUOTE]
    East Nashville.

  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_new-from-tennessee?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:7ad4238b-2938-429a-90ae-efb5628fcd98Post:bf1d6198-b302-4492-9948-35da8521abad">Re: New from Tennessee</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: New from Tennessee : East Nashville.
    Posted by ahstillwell[/QUOTE]

    <div>I'm in BG. We were in Nashville for CMA fest a few weeks ago.</div>
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_new-from-tennessee?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:136Discussion:7ad4238b-2938-429a-90ae-efb5628fcd98Post:4c7fdf9a-79a5-4b6b-86d9-69be3af701cb">Re: New from Tennessee</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: New from Tennessee : I'm in BG. We were in Nashville for CMA fest a few weeks ago.
    Posted by Wrkn925[/QUOTE]
    Sweet mercy, I work over on the Centennial campus and it was IMPOSSIBLE to get home when all of that CMA stuff was going on. Cutting through downtown is supposed to be the fast way home, come onnnn. At least the CMA stuff made them stop closing down 24 for the weekend like they've been doing for months to repair the bridges.

  • Traffic was moving pretty smoothly around LP. I was pleasantly surprised.

    and I got to have Bailey's while I was there. nomnom. And Yeingling. We drive to Nashville or Rivergate sometimes just for those two things. Yeingling isn't distributed in KY.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_new-from-tennessee?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:7ad4238b-2938-429a-90ae-efb5628fcd98Post:9d3e8652-65e5-4b03-8b6f-61e952b8d241">Re: New from Tennessee</a>:
    [QUOTE]And Yeingling. We drive to Nashville or Rivergate sometimes just for those two things. Yeingling isn't distributed in KY.
    Posted by Wrkn925[/QUOTE]

    Rivergate is a terrifying place, especially since I have to drive through Madison to get there.
    And seriously? Why isn't it?

  • Yeingling was a small brewery in Penn. I think it was meantto be cheap, kinda like PBR. They're America's oldest brewery now, and they've gotten a greater following than expected. Then expand their distribution by state as production allows, and have somehow skipped KY. Maybe some day. We also can't get Sweet Water. Let me know if you see Sweet Water Blue on draft anywhere. I haven't had it since Gatlinburg a few years ago.

    We JUST got Magic Hat and Fat Tire. 

    (i like beer.)
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_not-engaged-yet_new-from-tennessee?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:136Discussion:7ad4238b-2938-429a-90ae-efb5628fcd98Post:7df7ee6a-f50e-4d94-98cb-437f3bfaecfa">Re: New from Tennessee</a>:
    [QUOTE]Let me know if you see Sweet Water Blue on draft anywhere.
    Posted by Wrkn925[/QUOTE]

    They have it at The Flying Saucer on Broadway next to the Frist.

  • I came on here a few weeks ago asking for some womanly insight and advice about my relationship. I did receive some advice which was helpful.  I wanted nothing more then to take the next step with my then boyfriend, but he stated was not ready at the time. The advice given was to not pressure him and let things move naturally. So me being me I ended the relationship. Well to say the least those few weeks we horrible. But the light at the end of the tunnel was he came to me and stated "it's simple I love you"  he went on to say that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me, and he asked me to marry him. I have read several post of new people introducing themselves and I can say you ladies are a little scary.  Brutal honesty is the theme for this site but sometimes honest is the only policy. So thank you for the honest advice and womanly insight. Somebody asked a few questions so here are the responses.  Why do you feel like marriage is an important step right now? My answer to this question is yes, my parents have been married for 31 years and in my family just "shacking up" is not acceptable. I am old enough now and I have a better understanding about myself to know what I really want out of life and my relationship.  What do you think is holding bf back? I think that for him taking the next step was not something he knew in his life. His mother was married five years ago and the only married couple in his family are his sister, grandparents, and mom. He was in a ten year relationship that went know where.   What's your Masters in? I will be completing my masters in Human Service with an Emphasis on Marriage and Family Therapy, I am attending Liberty University online.  Favorite carb? Potatoes and bread  Do you feel like getting married will lessen the drama? I would expect baby-mamma-drama to expand upon nuptials.  I know the baby mama drama will intensify. But I cannot worry about her happiness over mine.  Are you a UT fan? (Fair warning, this is a trick question.) Sorry not a UT fan. Not really into college football but love my Tennessee Titans. (my best friend would slap me if she heard me, she went to UT and loves them) Well that's my little update.
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