NFP is it for me?

confetticandle8 · September 2011

So My FI and I just finished our last marriage prep class and in class we talked about NFP and I wanted to kind of getting other people's opinions about whether they like doing NFP or they prefer other types of contraceptives.

I am currently taking an oral contraceptive due to being diagnoised with menstral migraines over a year ago and I don't know if NFP will be good for me since I get migraines near my period.

shawna127 · September 2011

Hello

) I (along with most of the ladies on this board) think NFP is the BEST way to go! Birth control can do so many bad things to your body and it usually doesn't "help" anything, it just covers up symptoms. I used to think that I never wanted to do NFP either because I thought it wouldn't work. But I have completely changed my mind and would never take birth control again. If I were you I would at least go out and get the book "Taking Charge of your Fertility" and I would read it. It is not religious so it is completely science based. I think that after you read it a lot of your questions will be answered. Good luck with whatever you choose!!

)

catarntina · September 2011

Hi! I just want to say I LOVE using NFP and plan on using it for the rest of my life. I had severe menstrual cramps, to the point where they were debilitating and I was curled up in a little ball hoping they'd go away ... I also got cluster headaches around the time of my period to the point where I'd have to leave work because I couldn't bare it anymore.

After taking a class on NFP during marriage prep, doing some research on my own, I decided to try NFP. I charted for a while, and met with my doctor -- who happened to be Catholic and also charted for many, many cycles with success -- and she recommended all these non-hormonal ways to fix my problems.

B6 & B12 to help with the cramps. And magnesium supplements to help with the cluster headaches. She also identified that I had a very short luteal phase, which could make it hard when TTC (obviously, I can still get knocked up as seen in my ticker

). Ever since I started the Mg supplements, I've only had a few headaches and they only last minutes rather than days at a time. So thankful that I got off of hormonal birth control.

The class I took with CCL gave me a book -- Fertility, Cycles, and Nutrition -- by Marilyn Shannon. It has a lot of natural remedies to try to correct the problems.

_Dagney_ · September 2011

It's not true that horomonal birthcontrol usually doesn't help anything.
I had severe uterine fibroid tumors. I had surgery to have over 100 removed, including some the size of a grapefruit.

My Dr. put me on hormonal birth control to slow their growth to help preserrve my fertility until after we were married.

He said that there was a good chance that if they had to do surgery again they may have to remove my uterus.

I know this is just one example. But don't be so quick to judge. For me the temporary inability to become pregnant is a side effect of a treatment to ultimately preserve my fertility.

Calypso1977 · September 2011

my only regret with NFP is not starting it YEARS ago! i would never do any other method.

bibliophile2010 · September 2011

Three years ago I was totally the girl who thought NFP was gross, inconvenient, not with the reality of science, ineffective, etc.

About that time, I was dating this really great guy and things were starting to get serious. He, however, was adamant that, when we got married, we would use NFP, because that was the right thing to do. The issue was left unsettled for a long time between us. I was starting to think, though, that I was more interested in the guy than in the birth control. On the side, I started doing some research and soul searching.

I put the whole idea of NFP on my heart and told the Holy Spirit to go to work, do His thing, help me see His truth, whatever it was. I learned about the different methods and theories of NFP. I really focused on the science, because I think in my heart of hearts, I knew that my defensiveness was because God's way seems hard a lot of the time. In time, the beauty of the teaching really came to me. The more I learn about God's plan for sexuality, the more amazing it is.

I am married to the guy, by the way. We use NFP, even though I have a "difficult" chart, and am in the middle of getting things sorted out. He supports me 100% and we consider ourselves to be equal partners in OUR fertility.

I will be the first to recognize that we are not yet perfect at treating all things with non-BC treatments, but that is not because the BC is fixing the problems. It is because there are too few doctors/scientists who are investigating the answers. That said, I do think, from my research and my limited personal experience, that most (maybe not all) reproductive health disorders can be treated effectively without BC. It might not be as easy, but it will provide real, long-term solutions that will also preserve fertility.

Dagney, I'm sorry that you've had such a difficult experience. I will pray that things continue to go well for you in the future and that a non-BC solution can eventually be found.

bleubook · September 2011

Thank you for your prayers. It's not a "sin" in my case to take bcp as the primamry reason I am taking them is truly medically necessary. Much like if you had any forms of uterine cancer and a surgery left you unable to bear children, this is not the same thing as having your "tubes tied".

it's scary and I pray that it is gods will that I bear children. But if it's not, then I can accept that.

I'm honestly so grateful nothing was malignant. It was a very scary time last year when all this was happening.

bleubook · September 2011

Oh, and I actually WISH I could use NFP. I feel sort of cut off from my body because my cycles aren't "natural" now. I believe that the fact that god created us to have babies and share physical love while not having children by design is just a little more evidence of his perfect design. I feel like I'm missing out on not "participating" in it.

But the reality is, when the "time is right" for us to have children, the doctor said we might just have one "shot" at it and that a year or 2 off BCB could be enough time for tumors to grow back again to the point that they would interfear with conception, and possibly need another surgery.

PLEASE NOTE fibroid tumors are SUPER common and I don't want to scare anyone. For whatever reason I just have a very sevear case. something like 60% of all women have them and even with diagnosis, the doctors often choose not to do anything.

catarntina · September 2011

Bleubook, my friend has had several surgeries for fibroids and endometriosis, and she was also diagnosed with PCOS.

She was trying to conceive for almost a year, and the doctor gave her until November to TTC naturally before moving to IVF (She is NOT Catholic, btw). She did NOT want to move to IVF, and would have rather adopted.

I recommended TCOYF, and she literally conceived naturally the month after reading the book. I don't know if the book helped, or if she just got lucky and God blessed her.

But I just wanted to let you know that there is still hope for you when you do want to have children. I understand that you need to be on BCP in order to make that a possibility someday -- my friend had the same situation.

Kate504 · October 2011

Hi. I just finished NFP and found it very interesting.

I also just got off BCP about 2 months ago and am on my second cycle charting. My cycle used to be like clock work and now I have been having 40+ day cycles I will never go back on the pill. I originally went on the pill because I was diagnosed with cysts and I had to go the ER b/c I was in so much pain, riding in the car hurt! I have not had any pain since and wish I would have got off the pill sooner, because maybe that was just a one time thing, because since I have epilepsy my medication I take for that conteracted the pill's protection of getting pregnant anyway.

I find that knowing what your body does is very interesting and empowering almost.

This is just my opinion.

bbakerrd · October 2011

I've been taking oral contraceptives to help with 2 different medical contitions. I feel much better when I take the pill.

Migraines can be horribly painful and can affect your day to day life. I would have no problem using oral contraceptives in this situation. The good Lord has created this medication to help you feel better. I don't know that it would bother him/her if you used it.

bibliophile2010 · October 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_nfp-5?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:5d8d1820-67f5-4e99-bbfd-9f3c2889f862Post:8556bfc7-c593-47c1-b5f1-d808237fc209">Re: NFP is it for me?</a>:
[QUOTE]I've been taking oral contraceptives to help with 2 different medical contitions. I feel much better when I take the pill. Migraines can be horribly painful and can affect your day to day life. I would have no problem using oral contraceptives in this situation. <strong> The good Lord has created this medication to help you feel better.</strong> I don't know that it would bother him/her if you used it.
Posted by bbakerrd[/QUOTE]

God did not create contraception, man did. And it was not created to help you feel better it was created to sterilize sex. It was not the first time, nor will it be the last time, that man has done something contrary to God's plan.

Now, if you really truly believe that there is no other treatment for your medical conditions, I'm not here to tell you that you have to live in pain and discomfort, and agree that the Church is not asking this of you either, especially if you consider the nuances of its teaching on the BCP. I do, however, encourage you, like I encourage everyone with medical conditions, to consider a consultation with an NFP only doctor who might have some other options for you.

bbakerrd · October 2011

Man created oral contraceptives, God gave him the ability to do so.

I'm not letting a church run by men dictate what is medically appropriate for me and my body. Each one of us has different medical issues and we each require different treatment to suit our needs.

agapecarrie · October 2011

Christ put a man (Peter) in charge of the church. They don't dictate what is medically appropriate, but they do have the guidence of the Holy Spirit to relay to us faith and moral truths.

God gave everyone free will, that doesn't mean everyone uses it for good. As Biblio said, the church doesn't dictate medicine in this way (although there are ethical and non-ethcial uses), but has been said on many threads...there are better ways to treat most conditions than hormonal contraception, and that isn't coming from the church, that is coming from docs.

bibliophile2010 · October 2011

The ethics of Catholic medicine, including the use of contraception, are way more nuanced than "God gave man the ability to XYZ, so it must be ok." God gave us both free will and a Church to teach and guide us toward the truth. We have the responsibility to form our consciences in light of that truth.

Even then, there are extremly difficult choices and cases out there and scads of theologians and professionals trying to sort out what is and is not right.

Calypso1977 · October 2011

the "god gave us X" argument in order to justify something is so off base. people do this all time time, especially catholics, to try to justify IVF, for example.

what about abortion? would you say that God wants us to do that because he allowed a man to not only come up with the concept but created men who would make it legal?

bibliophile2010 · October 2011

Calypso, I was going to go even more ridiculous -- God gave us the ability to make guns, so it must be ok to shoot each other. The argument just doesn't make sense.

Riss91 · October 2011

God also created the forbidden fruit. Just sayin'

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