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how much?

KatyRoseMKatyRoseM member
First Anniversary First Comment
in Registry and Gift Forum
How much is normal to spend on a wedding gift?  What is your normal budget?  I have 2 weddings I can't go to and am sending a gift, should I spend more because I didn't pay to fly there and for the hotel?  Is there a price that you can't go below?  I'm new to this as my friends are just starting to get married but the last wedding I went to I got something in my budget and was told that I was supposed to pay as much as my dinner cost (which I had no idea about, or how much it cost).  Is there a point where the gift becomes rude?
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Re: how much?

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    gottahavashortigottahavashorti member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    The price range of the gifts we received was huge.  There isn't really a normal amount.  Spend an amount that fits in your budget and which you are comfortable with giving.  Gifts are never required so don't worry about a minimum price point.  If there is a registry, the couple should have registered for gifts in a variety of price points so that there is something within the budget of every guest who decides to shop from the registry.  It is pretty well established that it's disappointing to the couple when they don't receive at least a card with a heartfelt note from a guest who is a close friend, so at minimum give a card even if it is home made.

    As for traveling, it depends on whether travel decreases what you're financially able to spend on a wedding gift.  We're able to spend slightly more on a gift for a local wedding just because the cost of travel does eat into our monthly budget and leave less available for a gift.  Others don't let travel have any impact on their gift giving.

    There are some areas where most people give monetary gifts for the amount of their dinner (I want to say parts of New York) but that's a very localized norm and is not at all etiquette based.
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    unplainjaneunplainjane member
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    no gift is rude. don't worry about the amount. it's nice of you to send a gift even though you are not going to the wedding. if someone sent me a gift and they didn't come to my wedding i would be so pleasantly surprised. spend whatever you can afford. with all these weddings it can get expensive. on average i think people give a gift or money that ranges from $50-$300. so i think the range is huge.
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    taraz579taraz579
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    Any gift is nice, especially if you are unable to attend the wedding.  As far as covering the cost of your dinner, while I've 'heard' of that before, I think it is horribly rude and tacky to assume you're gift should cover any expense the couple may have spent to cover your meal.

    I feel the range of $50-300 is a good range and fits just about any budget.  Also, travel has been a factor in my purchasing gifts.  In august, we will be spending close to $800 in travel expenses (gas, hotel) for my fiancee's cousin and unfortunately we won't be able to spend what we normally would (fiancee is unemployed).

    My normal budget is usually at least $100-150 minumum.  totally off subject, but I have this guy in my hometown, that etches onto mirror/glass.  And I usually have him do the names, date & a nice personal quote for the couple, and something smaller off the registry.  Anyways, I feel it's a personal preference and what you are able to afford at the time.

    Good luck :)
    When we walk to the edge of all the light we have and take the step into the darkness of the unknown, we must believe that one of two things must happen: There will be something solid for us to stand on, or we will be taught to fly. -Patrick Overton
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    flamingtwig72flamingtwig72 member
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    I usually give 100-200; however, I'd give as low as 50 if I were travelling and/or it was a very low budget wedding. I think anything below 50 is rude. How much you give depends on your relationship to the couple, primarily, though. Some people (myself included) then base it on travelling vs. not travelling and the cost of their wedding (slightly). I think it's nice to "cover your plate," but I don't take it to the extreme. For instance, if it's a backyard barbecue, I wouldn't spend as much as I would for a black tie wedding. Hope all that answers your question.
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    skippylouwhoskippylouwho member
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    I base my gift on how close I am to the couple, not on how expensive the wedding is> If it is a couple that I'm close to then I spend more. If it is a couple I know casually or am not as close to I'll spend less.  For showers I typically spend $50 to $75, for weddings from $75 to $200.
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    clarereedyclarereedy
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    Like one of the previous posts said, it sometimes depends on where you live.  I'm from New York and you try to "cover your plate".  When I go to a shower I'll spend anywhere from 50-100 depending on who the shower is for.  For a wedding, I tend to give 300 from FI and I for our friends/coworkers and 400-500 for family.  Most of the places are charging a minimum of 100 a person, so I try to cover our plates and then give them something in addition. 
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