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Divorced, Remarried and Deceased Parents…Invitation wording dilemma

csavercoolcsavercool
in Wedding Customs & Traditions Forum
My parents are divorced and remarried and both sets are paying for the wedding but my step dad recently passed away.  My fiancés dad passed away a few years ago.  All the etiquette books say if they are not living then they are not listed on the invitation.  They also say if the widow has not remarried then you list as Mrs. and the deceased fathers name…trouble is that one mom wants to be listed as Mrs. and the other wants her own name and a reference to the late father.  Anyone have any suggestions on how to word this so everyone is happy?  Is it ok to list them differently?
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Re: Divorced, Remarried and Deceased Parents…Invitation wording dilemma

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    andy71781andy71781 member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    I had this same problem.  I will tell you that its 100% not etiquette approved to have a deceased family member on the invitation but I did it anyway.  My parents are divorced and remarried but I didn't put step-parents on it.  This is how I did it.

    Andy's Dad
    Andy's Mom
    invite you to the marriage of their daughter
    Andy
    to Andy's FI
    son of FFIL and FMIL (may her memory be blessed)
    at blah blah blah

    Divorced parents go on a different line without an "and" and the "may her memory  be blessed"s is a jewish thing.

    Or you can make it WHOLE lot easier and say "Together with their families"
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    Lilou902Lilou902 member
    First Comment

    You can also do this:

    Mother of Bride
    Father of Bride
    Invite you to the marriage of your daughter
    Bride
    to Groom
    Son of Mrs. Groom
    and the late Mr. Groom

    THis is acceptable
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    jbentijbenti member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    Together with their parents Jill and Jack......
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    Norms Angel ForeverNorms Angel Forever
    First Comment
    i'm using "together with thier parents" (especially as FI parents swapped significant others :S) 
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    KnittibellKnittibell
    First Comment
    When I married my now late husband, his mum was recently deceased-

    We did:

    Mr and Mrs. Jeffrey Jones invite you to the wedding of their daughter
    Jane Doe Jones
    to
    John Smith
    Son of Paul Smith and the late Wendy Smith

    My then FI really wanted his mother mentioned, and I was totally ok with it. I'm an etiquette hound, but screw it on this sort of thing.

    That's the gist-

    Also

    Together with their families... is a great alternative.
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    summerbaby8844summerbaby8844
    First Comment
    Thanks to all of you this helped me as well. . my fiance's mother passed away and his father is remarried. we were having a hard time thinking of what to say. I love 'together with their families'
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