Wedding Etiquette Forum

WWJD

I quit my job. I wasn't put in a position where giving notice was really an option. My options were sign this farked up contract that had stipulations I was very  uncomfortable with (I'd really rather not go into detail) or leave. I put together a very polite letter of resignation, gave it to the head honcho, and was told to be at the office the next day to drop off my key and pick up my personal stuff from my desk. So anyhoo, I'm unemployed as of now. I haven't really started looking for anything else yet. I've emailed a few people in my field to see if they know of anything available, but I haven't sent out my resume or anything like that, so far.

FI and I are financially stable without my income. The wedding is two months away. I realize it can take a while to find a new job, but I'm hesitant to REALLY start looking right now because I don't want to start a new job by taking time off for the wedding and the honeymoon right off the bat. But then, I might not even find anything in two months, so maybe it wouldn't hurt to look now. Would Jesus look for a new job now or wait til after his wedding? Kidding. WWYD?
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Whatever you hatters be hattin. -Tay Prince
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Re: WWJD

  • You're kind of excluding the agnostics and the atheists here, aren't cha?

    God lover.
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  • I don't think looking would hurt right now. With the economy the way it is, it may take awhile to find something good. That said, you have great intentions in not wanting to start and then take time off for a wedding. If you are upfront in saying something about your prior commitments and not wanting them to affect your training in the new position, I think that will generate some additional respect.

    By the way, congrats on sticking to your gut feelings about what you were and were not comfortable doing with your old job!
  • i would look for a new job - but be forthcoming upon receiving the offer about your upcoming nuptuals
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  • I would start looking.  I'm not sure what industry you are in, but you can state up front that you (a) would have to take time off soon after starting, or (b) not start until two months from now.

    A friend of mine at work started about two months before she got married.  She had tried to delay it, but they wanted her to start right away, since they were busy.  In this economy, why not look?  What's the worst that could happen?  You find a job?
  • Wow, that's rough...

    I don't know what the job market is like in your particular area, but if it's anything like most of the country, I would go ahead and start looking now, or at least get an idea of what's out there.
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  • I would definitely put my resume together and start looking. 

    I started a job 2 months before our wedding.  They way this new company handled the situation helped me to know that this was a great place to work.  I asked for 1 week and 2 days off for the wedding.  They kept asking if I needed more time off - they didn't want me to be stressed! 
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wwjd?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e6ba849b-5811-42c8-add0-d7f2e84eb050Post:da80ec61-bce4-4fd8-b61f-ee2b3013cca8">Re: WWJD</a>:
    [QUOTE]You're kind of excluding the agnostics and the atheists here, aren't cha? God lover.
    Posted by crfische[/QUOTE]
    Well Fishy you're right. I'd also like to ask what Allah, God, and the Flying Spaghetti Monster would do.
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    Whatever you hatters be hattin. -Tay Prince
  • Good for you!! I would look for a new job right away. If an interview comes along just be really honest with them about your wedding timeline. Most reasonable people will be A-OK with it. 

    GOD I'm jealous. Will you come quit my job, too?
  • Ditto everyone else.  Start looking, but be forthcoming about your needing time off soon.

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  • Sorry, that sucks! 

    I would start looking now and be up-front if you end up getting a follow-up interview and/or offer anywhere.  At least start the process now because depending on how long you've been at your (now past) job, it can take a while to update your resume and cover letter the way you like it.
  • there's a flying spaghetti monster religion?  sign me up!
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  • Good for you! Too many people are put in positions like that today, and you just happen to be one of the few who can afford to stick to what they believe in instead of having to think with their wallets. Bravo! And good luck with the job search. Start now... If you feel like it... Sometimes it takes a while to find something, but I wouldnt worry about the wedding, as long as you are up-front when the job is offered.
  • What about maybe doing a bartending gig until after the wedding?  Didnt you used to bartend prior to the job you're at now?  It might be easier to find, more flexible for the odds and ends of last months of wedding planning - and give you daytime hours to look for a job closer to the wedding or right afterwards. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wwjd?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e6ba849b-5811-42c8-add0-d7f2e84eb050Post:0eb4f2a1-b07a-4a75-911c-e9f4f779fa58">Re: WWJD</a>:
    [QUOTE]i would look for a new job - but be forthcoming upon receiving the offer about your upcoming nuptuals
    Posted by xyrius[/QUOTE]
    I would do this.

    What happened sweetface?  That sucks. :(  Me sowy.
  • I was already kind of thinking what everyone else was saying. But I can't make a decison without consulting this message board first. Thanks ladies. And thanks Meg! Apparently, contrary to what I thought, I do have principles.
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    Whatever you hatters be hattin. -Tay Prince
  • THANK YOU FOR BEING ALL INCLUSIVE. :)

    I'm down with Jesus.
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  • Hmm., I got laid off in February, and am still on the unemployment payroll.  Gotta love extensions.

    I'm a teacher, so its hard to find jobs anyways, especially in the middle of the year.  Plus, I broke my wrist a week before my lay off (the lay off was no surprise), and had a paid vacation my last "week" of work, with surgery on the last day.  So my healing time and therapy I needed off anyways.  After that, I would look for jobs, but really just worked on planning my wedding.  We didn't set our date until after that anyways, and so I really had to focus on planning.  We also were fine with just H's income and my unemployment, so it wasn't an issue.  We have also moved cross country, so looking for a new job in NY was pointless.

    I know our situations are different, but I loved not working during the time before my wedding.  And when anyone would ask what I did for a living, I would say I was a professional wedding planner.  Technically, I was getting paid to plan my wedding.
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  • And also.......so sorry about your job.  I thought they were typically so laid back there?
  • I'd at least start really looking.  As you noted, it can take a while for HR wheels to really get rolling so even if you interview before the wedding, there's not a guarantee you'd get the job or the offer before it.  Beside which, if you're in a position where you've got a decent amount of relevant experience and you're in demand, they may wait on you.  Plus, looking can help with any afternoon boredom that isn't taken up by wedding stuff.  Last thing is that the perfect job for you could be waiting out there - I've missed the boat on a couple of postings by a few days and was miffed that I did.  They were great opportunities, and I personally don't like missing out. 

    Full disclosure: I've been looking for a different job for months now, and have had a couple of interviews recently, but haven't disclosed my wedding date/time I'd need off.  I think that they don't need to know until they make me an offer because it shouldn't factor into their decision.  It's not a black mark against me taking that time (I'm willing to use unpaid/vacation time, or to borrow against it) since getting married is (ideally) a one-time thing. 
  • I think the FSM would kick back and enjoy a few beers from the Holy Beer Volcano first. 

    Seriously though, I would start looking.  In this economy, it could take much longer than that to find a job (duh, captain obvious: party of one).  If you are fortunate enough to get another job offer in the next month, just be upfront with them after they make the offer that you'd like to have x number of days off or to start after the wedding. 
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wwjd?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:e6ba849b-5811-42c8-add0-d7f2e84eb050Post:0d148ec7-7331-4e9b-918f-8d271e386659">Re: WWJD</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: WWJD : Well Fishy you're right. I'd also like to ask what Allah, God, and the Flying Spaghetti Monster would do.
    Posted by laurenclaire1386[/QUOTE]

    What would Brian Boitano do?

    He'd make a plan and follow through!  That's what Brian Boitano'd do!
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wwjd?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e6ba849b-5811-42c8-add0-d7f2e84eb050Post:ee22e091-47b6-42dd-883b-54ca736034dd">Re: WWJD</a>:
    [QUOTE]What about maybe doing a bartending gig until after the wedding?  Didnt you used to bartend prior to the job you're at now?  It might be easier to find, more flexible for the odds and ends of last months of wedding planning - and give you daytime hours to look for a job closer to the wedding or right afterwards. 
    Posted by Stackeye210[/QUOTE]
    I thought about that. My brother texted me just yesterday to tell me the bar where I used to work is looking for someone experienced. The only thing is, I'd know it was temporary and that would make me feel bad, knowing I'd leave as soon as I found something better. Also, I'd be inclined to tell them it was temporary and probably wouldn't get the job after that anyway. Or maybe they'd let me work a few months til I found something in my field while they looked still. Maybe I should talk to them anyway.
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    Whatever you hatters be hattin. -Tay Prince
  • I would definitely start looking!  If you get an interview, tell them upfront that you have a wedding coming up soon and you will work with them however possible.  My sister just got a great job with a wedding coming up and they didn't mind.  They worked with her a ton and appreciated her honesty. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wwjd?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e6ba849b-5811-42c8-add0-d7f2e84eb050Post:22b26ebe-d60e-435a-af4a-9ca0c491f01a">Re: WWJD</a>:
    [QUOTE]Also, I know a lot of bar hours are on the weekend evenings, but you could also push for weekday evening hours hardcore and that could really curb some of your boredom while FI is out of town on business.
    Posted by Stackeye210[/QUOTE]
    Stacks, you're making some excellent points. I didn't burn any bridges when I left, and then the guy who owned it when I worked there sold it, but they've asked me to work a handful of times when they were really desperate for whatever reason. The only problem with the daytime hours is that the happy hour shifts are given to people as a sort of promotion. It's kind of hard to explain, but I wouldn't be able to come back after being gone for three years and take the daytime hours. That wouldn't fly at all.
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    Whatever you hatters be hattin. -Tay Prince
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wwjd?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e6ba849b-5811-42c8-add0-d7f2e84eb050Post:4547fac3-b368-49bd-b835-73e09003185e">Re: WWJD</a>:
    [QUOTE]Add me to the "start looking but be upfront about the wedding" team. Sorry, dollface. That really sucks that they'd force you into a crappy contract all of a sudden.
    Posted by opalsky007[/QUOTE]
    Thanks for the sympathy. It really did hurt to leave. I love my coworkers and I'll miss them tremendously. But yeah, the big boss and his wife have been behaving erratically, to say the least.
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    Whatever you hatters be hattin. -Tay Prince
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_wwjd?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e6ba849b-5811-42c8-add0-d7f2e84eb050Post:da701802-9e69-4a4b-8bd8-f0972537314b">Re: WWJD</a>:
    [QUOTE]Good for you!! I would look for a new job right away. If an interview comes along just be really honest with them about your wedding timeline. Most reasonable people will be A-OK with it.  GOD I'm jealous. Will you come quit my job, too?
    Posted by mandapanda78[/QUOTE]

    Sure! I'm pretty good at it, it seems.
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    Whatever you hatters be hattin. -Tay Prince
  • I'm in with the "start looking but be upfront about the time off" crowd. You don't have to make a FT job out of job searching, but this will give you more time to find the right job, instead of feeling pressured to take the first one. 
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  • I, too, would start looking now.  I wouldn't disclose the wedding in my application or cover letter, but at the end of an interview, if you feel it's going well, I likely would.  I did that with all the interviews I had leading up to moving up here, and they were all very understanding.  One job needed someone right away, so I wasn't elligible for that position, but she slotted me into the next one that was opening up on my desired timeline.  I ended up taking something different, though. 

    I'd also look for something temporary to do in the interim, whether it's bartending or retail or whatever.  Stay busy, make some cash, maybe even network with people a bit.  Can't hurt.
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  • I'm sorry, LC. Sucks to have been put in that position, but it sounds like you made the best possible choice. I think the bartending plan sounds like a good one if you want something to do and some extra money, but I'd probably also start looking for jobs right away...at least getting your resume in order and getting an idea of possible places to apply.
  • look now. get practice interviewing. if you get a job offer you don't have to accept.
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