African American Weddings

Say NO to the Dress

I may be late but..... I just saw an episode of Say Yes to the Dress Bridesmaids where the budget she made her girls agree to was $500 for the BM dress!!!!!!! I would've politely declined. How much is too much for a BM dress? I'm hoping to keep my girls total cost for clothes under $250 with alterations
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Re: Say NO to the Dress

  • edited December 2011
    I'm also trying to be budget conscious due to the fact that I'm having a destination wedding and my sister's (my MOH) household is responsible for not only travel accomidations for 4 but also wedding attire for 3 of the 4 people.  I'm hoping to find something under $150 for my girls... it's a beach wedding so one thing we won't have to worry about are shoes :)  But YES $500.00 is outrageous.  Honestly I don't want to pay that much for MY dress!! 
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  • chescamchescam member
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    edited December 2011
    whoa, that's a whole lot of money for a bridesmaid dress. I didn't even spend that much money on my dress. I asked my girls for their budget and and had them decide on the dress they wanted to wear. The dress they agreed upon was under $200 and they got a discount because they purchased it from the same place I got mine.
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  • edited December 2011
    my girls won't spend that on my entire wedding weekend and all of them have to travel (by plane). That's inconsiderate to me to expect someone to spend that for one day.
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  • edited December 2011
    I don't think that is a reasonable budget for most people, but if a bride or a her BM earn salaries that are commensurate, then it may not be too expensive. I think people know their friends well enough to determine what is a reasonable budget.  As many of you have stated, you selected dresses that were commensurate to your friends' budget and what was reasonable for them.  

    I had a client who was older when she married and her and her friends were well established in their careers.  She choose a dress for them that $500. They didn't balk about the cost, but the wedding was a quick planning window (about 70 days from proposal to wedding) there was not enough time to order the dresses, even with the $200 rush fee on top of the base price.  She selected another dress that was about $275 that could be delivered in time.  All that said, her girls would have paid for it if was feasible for her timeline.  It just depends on your friends.  
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  • empeguesempegues member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    $500 is nuts!  I felt bad asking my girls to spend $150 on their dresses, simply because they'll be traveling and paying for their accomodations as well.  They didn't mind paying $150 at all (thank goodness).  $500 is crazy though.
  • island07b2bisland07b2b member
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    edited December 2011
    Well it all depends on who your girls are I suppose, huh?  I saw this episode and the bride for sure was hoity toity so it did not surprise me that she expected her girls to pay $500 for their dresses.  She also made it clear that if you didn't want to do that then feel free to attend the wedding as a guest.  LOL!  No shame in her game. 

    If I were a BM who was expected to pay $500 then I am going to buy the dress I WANT!!  The bride could tell me her color scheme etc but there is no way I would let her tell me what to wear and I didn't like it.  And then to add insult to injury, I have to pay $500 for the privilege.  I. DO.NOT.THINK. SO. 

    If you run in upscale circles, then sure $500 is probably nothing.  But for most of us, I think $250 to $300 is the absolute max with alterations included to ask the BP to pay.  





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  • edited December 2011
    Her ass would have been one BM short lol. That is ridiculous.
  • edited December 2011
    I saw that one. I will say she did tell them in the email she sent asking them to be her bridesmaids. They probably thought she was playing saying $500 but yeah she was crazy
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  • happe2getherhappe2gether member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_african-american-weddings_say-dress?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:400Discussion:7340a58c-3288-4d9c-a9a1-17491dff10b2Post:7bcd62a4-70fd-46ee-82f4-c89a649b063d">Re: Say NO to the Dress</a>:
    [QUOTE]Her ass would have been one BM short lol. That is ridiculous.
    Posted by JDNDREWS[/QUOTE]

    EXAACTLY This!! I'm feeling bad about $160.00 because of the added travel expenses but I think I'm going to let Pearl's Place come to the rescue and save my girls a few dollars.  But 500 is too much! I saw that episode.  She was ridiculous. Black tie or not, $500. is too much.  
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  • hatroopeshatroopes member
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    edited December 2011
    I agree that it depends on your BMs - you have to know your circle and what they can afford. My BM dresses cost $220 but since the dresses are floor length, they can wear whatever silver shoes they already own. They will also be getting the custom made traditional Nigerian dresses which will cost around $150 (for fabric and tailoring)
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  • edited December 2011
    It definitely depends, I have younger friends who are either still in school or have yet to be settled into their careers. My MOH dress was 150 and my BM dresses were $75 !! $500 is too much!
  • DancerppfDancerppf member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think it depends on your financial circle. Knowing your bridesmaid and their level of affordability is important. My bridesmaids dresses were $300 plus alterations. My MOHs and 1 bridesmaid are financially well off and had no problem. One bridesmaid isn't as well off and I brought her dress for her.  $500 is alot but for some its okay.
  • shaneikawshaneikaw member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I think $500 is way too much considering that you are asking someone to be a part of your wedding and there are other expenses that come along with that responsibility.  So yes I would have gracely declined!!!! I'm staying under $175 for my girls dresses and asked them if it was alright with them for that budget.
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  • prncszprncsz member
    Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My girls dresses were 150.00, shoes were 50.00, and I think their alterations are coming in at 60.00 for those going through DB for alterations but I told them to find someone else to alter if they could. So at most for clothing
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  • M1ssJM1ssJ member
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    edited December 2011

    Man I  honestly hope none of my friends ever ask that although in my circle I'd be the most likely to ask lol.

    Prnscz are you really inviting 329 people? Can I come lol?

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