Etiquette

To invite my co-workers or not, that is the question...

Help! I am having trouble deciding if I should invite my work group to my wedding. I planned on inviting them when my fiance and I first setup our guest list because we were the only 5 people from the department working in the building so we talked a lot. However, a few months ago the rest of our department (25 people) moved into our building (I work for a big company that is consolidating buildings, and our group was working in different building then the other groups.) Now that the rest of the department is here we do not talk to each other about non-work related stuff nearly as much. I would still like to invite my manager, but if I only invite her she will only know two other people there (2 of my friend from different departments in the company; who both know a handful of other people that will be there.) I feel like I should invite the rest of the group so she isn't by herself. I would kind like them to be there, but I guess the part I'm having a hard time with is pay for their dates (its $95 a plate); one is married but the other two are single and are not dating anyone (and either is my manager)... Is it rude to just invite them without guests? But what do I do with the married one? If I invite one with a guest, don't I have to invite all with a guest. I know another girl from work that only invited the work people, without guests, even though most of them were married or in serious relationships... my fiance thinks this is poor etiquette... Any thoughts? Oh the politics of wedding planning!
Thanks for any help you can give!

(PS I don't think any of them would be offended if I didn't invite them)

Re: To invite my co-workers or not, that is the question...

  • In your case, I just wouldn't invite any of them.  $95 a person is a LOT for co-workers that aren't your close personal friends.
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  • For me and my fiance-the only coworkers we are inviting are our friends.  We are not inviting the whole group just because someone will feel bad or we feel we have to.
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  • 1.  You won't be sending invitations until Feb 2011, so you have time to see how your work group changes with the reorganization.

    2.  We didn't invite anyone from work.  We don't go to their houses, we don't go out to dinner with them, etc. - so they aren't FRIENDS.  They are just people we know from work.  And that wasn't enough...
  • That is a really tough one! I say stick to the original 5, and invite their dates. I have always been a firm believer that everyone over the age of 18 should get a date invite. I understand your price dilemma, our dinner was $115 per plate so there wasn't really any room for acquaintances or people that I would not have hung out with outside of work. I ended up inviting 6 coworkers and their dates, and four of them ended up coming, all with their dates. If you invited the original 5, then I think the rest of your office would be able to see where you drew the line. Good luck! Try not to stress about it :)
  • Thank you all for your input, I really appreciate it!!!  I do have sometime to think about it but I wanted to start putting the invitations together when I have some time before the holidays so I am not rushed come January (which is when they are going out).  I guess I'll just wait a couple weeks to see what happens and label theirs last if I decide to invite them.
    Thanks again!
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