Plus sized bridesmaid dress

tseay · October 2010

I picked out several bridesmaid dresses and sent them to my girls in an email to let them pick the one they liked best. They all picked the ones shown in the picture. Then I thought two of my girls are plus sized and this might not flatter their figures. I want them to be beautiful and most importantly feel comfortable. No tugging, pulling, or spilling "out". I've read that satin is a no no for plus sized girls. A couple of people told me that these aren't the best dresses because of the material, the form fit up top, and the fact that it doesn't have straps. What should I do? Do we start the search over? The dresses look great on the girls in the photo but they don't have any boobs and they're probably a size 0-2.

ZachandMere · October 2010

What I did for my BMs is give them a color and a fabric that they had to go with from a certain vendor (JCrew). Other than that I didn't care what dress they had (or shoes for that matter). My BMs are all different sizes, including one petite. I thought that because they are adults, they probably know what looks best on them and don't need my input any further. They each chose a different style (by coincidence) and look fabulous. That's what I would do.

As a sidebar, I'm not plus sized (I'm a 2), but had it suggested to me while trying on dresses that I should wear Spanx under my wedding dress (by the sales girl). It was the most offensive comment I've ever experienced while shopping. I would make sure that this is not suggested by the sales people where you shop as it makes the dress-wearer very embarrassed.

tseay · October 2010

Thanks Zach, but thats not really the information I was looking for. The girls chose this dress out of several choices and they really love it. I was asking whether it was the best dress for a plus sized girl.

BTW spanx aren't just for bigger girls. I'm tall and slender, but I'll wear spanx (or something similar) when I'm wearing certain fabrics. I'm sure the salesperson didn't mean anything by it.

nannewmur · October 2010

My daughter is a plus size. She is 5'10 and weighs approximately 230. Plus sized strapless gowns usually require A LOT of alterations which can add a lot of cost. My dd was asked to be in a wedding and the bride selected a strapless from DB. The alterations alone cost $200+ in addition to the $139 for the dress. Strapless generally is not flattering on a plus size girl. Many shops can place straps on dresses which helps a lot. I am sure you want them to be comfortable and a plus size girl who is does a strapless is usually miserable after a few hours due to no support. Usually the girls are constantly tugging and trying to adjust the dress. Also, if it is decided to go strapless, be sensitive about the photos-so often you see the girls bent over in a pix showing way too much cleavage. Good luck!

squirrly · October 2010

I think it really depends. Not every plus-sized girl is put together the same way. One of my BMs was large enough that she couldn't try on any of the samples, but not officially plus sized. They each got to choose their own dress (I picked a color, fabric, and designer - they did the rest). She chose a strapless dress with a really full, floorlength a-line skirt with pickups. It did require alterations, but no more than those required by my BM who is 5'10 and a size 2.

That said - dresses with rouching over the torso offer the most camoflauge for figures that aren't model-worthy, regardless of fabric.

The dress on the left in your photo would probably be the least flattering of the three, as it's rather fitted through the hips/tush. Personally, I think the one in the center is the best of the three, as it's not super smooth in places that are figure-hugging, and the tightest cinching is just under the braline, which might offer some support.

If it were me, I'd look for bridal shops that carry dresses your BMs can try on - all of them. Even it it means going to multiple shops. Even if they can't try the exact dress on, perhaps they can try on something similar. You might also look for stores that carry separates from that designer's line - the tops usually unzip entirely, which would let you at least hold one in position if you couldn't zip it. Give you some clue what things would look like.

Also, you might ask on the Attire and Accessories board. They know a LOT more about dresses!

ZachandMere · October 2010

Sorry my comment didn't really help. Although I do agree with the comments about adding straps. My BMs that were larger on top really appreciated the dresses with straps as it held "the girls" up better. Hope you find what you're looking for!

tseay · October 2010

Thanks Nann....Straps are definitely a good idea. I think we'll go back to the drawing board with the dresses. We all fell in love with the ones shown above, but I don't think they are the best fit in reality. Darn you size two models with your trickery and magic!!

Zach and Squrrily, thanks for your input! Since each bridesmaid is in a different state it makes it kinda difficult for us to all try on the same thing. I was hoping that I could find something at one of the major department stores like Macy's but no such luck just yet. Anywho, let the new search begin (I guess)

austinandstella · October 2010

I know I am a little late, but I just wanted to say that I really do think it depends on the girl. Every plus sized girl is different, and in all honesty fabrics really don't mean much. It is the shape and fit that matter. My sister and I are both plus sized, however we have very different shapes so, while we might wear close to the same number size, we don't wear the same outfits. I personally think that letting them choose like others have mentioned might be easiest. I also think that they might need to go try stuff on before making a decisions. I can also say that personally I look better in strapless dresses than I do in halter styles or ones with thin straps because I have large angular shoulders.

Birdie1483 · October 2010

Is it important to you that the girls all have the same dress?

I'm a "plus size" girl and I can say that I don't think I'd be comfortable in any of those dresses. However, I think I have a weird body type. I haven't always been on the bigger size, so most of my weight is around my waist. I look for dresses that will flatter my figure and make me not look pregnant. However, I have friends who are actually smaller than me in pants size but have much bigger hips than me. We're all just build differently.

For this matter and the fact that all of the girls are in different states, it might be best in the long run to pick a color at a place like David's Bridal and let them pick their own dress. Or you can do what one of my friends did where all of the girls had the same floor length skirt and they got to pick their own top (since it was a two piece). They all looked harmonious and they were comfortable with their own choices.

If it's possible, I would try to take one of your plus size girls shopping and see what she thinks about the dresses when she tries them on. Possibly try a sash to camouflage the tummy area and create the allusion of hips and a waist.

Plus sized bridesmaid dress

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