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Newbie- long

This is my first time posting to the boards but I have read A LOT of the North Florida posts.
I've been engaged since October 18, 2010 and plan on getting married June 23, 2012. I was never the child that grew up saying I'm going to have a dream wedding... so its hard for me to really come up with ideas. Here's what I have so far. ((Any feedback/advice is welcome. I am without a clue on a lot))

-Venues- Terry Parker Baptist Church. ((His church growing up & its free.)) Reception possibly Fire Fighters Union Hall. but open for something else cheap.
-We were thinking having the wedding at 4pm, cocktail hour while the wedding party does pictures then reception.
-Colors/theme Teal/Jade Gold and Black. ((Jaguar colors))
- Any kind of white or black flowers.
-We are Having a friend do the DJing but we have to give him a list of songs.
-His aunts are doing flowers. ((They are awesome at floral arrangements))
-Our rough draft guest list is about 200 people. That's before the parents have had their inputs on who they are requesting to be invited...

Here are things I'm really not sure on
-Alcohol. Champagne, beer and Spiked punch. We are paying for the start of it but should we offer more?
-Wedding party. This is a big one...
Bridesmaids- I don't get along with many girls but I have a set of 5 girls picked out and a possible 6th one. Only one is family when should I announce the bridesmaids?
Groomsmen- He has 5 guys that are GREAT! 2 are family members and the other 3 have been friends for years. He has no hesitation on the 5 he has picked. But he has 4 guys that he wanted to be GM that I don't feel like is necessary to make ushers. they are people that only come around to events with free alcohol. How can i convince him to just have the 5 groomsmen that do double duty and no ushers?
- Registries. Bed Bath and beyond and Target are the only places we are planning on registering... is there anywhere else we should register?

TIA for any feedback && I look forward to getting to know some of you in the next year!!!

Re: Newbie- long

  • edited December 2011
    Congrats !! I was engaged on 10/19/10  :)
  • edited December 2011

    Here are a couple of thoughts- not sure if this is the sort of input you're looking for...

    * Alcohol- Champagne toast is nice to have, but sparkling wine is cheaper, and it's very unlikely anyone will know the difference. It's fine to offer beer and wine, and soft drinks.Spiked punch could be potentially messy and expensive. (messy if people don't realize how spiked it is, and suddenly you've got a bunch of really drunk guests)- also who will keep refreshing that?  If you talk to the local liquor store, you'll likely get a discount if you're buying a lot of beer and wine- there's a wine brand called "barefoot"- really nice wine at a VERY reasonable price. Also talk to the liquor store to see if you can return unopened bottles. Unless the punch is something really common in your area, or to your family, I'd probably skip it and stick to beer, wine and soda!

    * I'm not sure what you mean by "announcing" bridesmaids? You don't have to make any sort of formal announcement to anyone as to who is in your wedding party, though the info will go into your programs. :)  As for your FI wanting ushers- if it's really important to him, then let him have them. You might point out to him that for every person who is IN the wedding party, you'll need to pay for a boutonniere for them, and get them a thank you gift, as well. If you're on a tight budget, the smaller the wedding party, the better. Also, it's ok if your sides don't "match"- you should each have the most important people to you, and if the numbers aren't even, it's no problem! :)

    *registries sound great!

    *As for your parents input on who is invited to the wedding, are they paying for the wedding? If so, then you do need to let them invite who they'd like. If you and your fiance are paying, then you can set a limit (say, they each get to invite two couples), in order to keep the numbers from getting out of control.

    I hope that helps, and congratulations! 
  • edited December 2011
    Congratulations and it def seems like you got a good grasp on everything!!!!

    If you can get access to a Costco or Sams card you can buy alcohol (wine, beer, and liquour) there for alot cheaper.  We were thinking of doing some sort of Bahama Mama punch (our favorite from cruises we have taken!!) but I didn't think about who would refresh that if you don't have a bartender (good point you brought up Knittibell!)

    I would just let your bridesmaids know in person..I was in a wedding last year and the bride actually took us all out to lunch and announced it then!!

    I was driving yesterday and kept hearing a ad for myregistry.com  So came home last night and its a website where you can add your registries from all different stores to one place!! Might be helpful if your thinking of doing different stores!!
  • bdale28bdale28 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    thank you all for replying.
    i didnt think about the punch on how sloppy people might get. But i will be having a "bartender" just to make sure anyone that is drinking is of age... its not going to be self serve.

    As for the announcing bridesmaids i dont want to do anything formal as in throwing a party or anything but i would like to sit down with the girls and have lunch and let them know pretty much what they will be responsible for and such... i think that would be my best option but it would be difficult to get everyone together at once...

    The guest list- All of our parents are paying for parts of the wedding...and we are also paying for some of it... ((I have divorced parents that dont get along and another set of "adoptive" parents they arent my own but they treat me like i am a part of the blood family. and his parents are still married.)) So we have 4 sets of parents we have to please as guests go... So thats a lot of uncles aunts and cousins to invite...

    would it be O.K. to send an announcement to some people but not an invitation?  I've never recieved just an announcement and i feel like if we do that its saying "give me money or presents but i dont want you to witness the wedding"
  • edited December 2011
    Having a bartender will definitely help!

    As for the bridesmaids- you can invite the girls you want to ask to lunch, and ask them then, but you are aware that technically, they are not required to do anything for you, apart from showing up on the day in the proper attire, and supporting you? Just be careful of how you address this- you don't want to start delegating responsibilities that they don't really have- does this make sense?

    I'd skip the announcement, unless you put it in a local paper, or something to that effect.
    Looks like you're in good shape!
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