Gay Weddings

Engaged for a Year

My fiance and I have been engaged for a year and she's beginning to ask me more and more questions about the wedding. She knows I want to put a lot of time and work in it because I want a wedding that would be just as wonderful and beautiful as a straight couple because everyone deserves that. The problem is we live in NC and right now the way things are it doesn't look like NC will ever be permitting gay weddings. So my question is where do you start? 

My fiance is from Philly and she loves being up north so we thought we would do something in NY but that makes things ever harder for me to figure out where to start? What are some places to start with?

Re: Engaged for a Year

  • 2dBride2dBride member
    5 Love Its First Anniversary Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We live near DC, but ended up getting married in Massachusetts.  (At the time, DC didn't have same-sex marriage.)  We did what I think most couples in your situation do--have a tiny ceremony (private or with just a few family members and close friends) followed by a much larger at-home reception.  We had a luncheon in the private dining room of a restaurant as our Massachusetts reception (which greatly simplified planning).

    I'd also suggest checking out the New York local board.  I know I used the Boston board a lot to get local information on vendors, etc.
  • edited December 2011
    FI and I live in Missouri, and what we're doing is having a ceremony here with family and friends that won't be a legally recognized wedding, and then stopping in NYC for a couple of days on the way to the honeymoon to have the legal ceremony at the court house with just the two of us. 
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  • chrmunchrmun member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    We are planning our ceremony and reception for June of 2012.  Chances are that it still won't be legal, (again) but honestly we're sick of waiting.

    We are choosing not to go have a legal ceremony in a state where it IS recognized, though.  Mostly because we don't really see the point in getting a marriage license that won't be valid where we live.  I mean, we're already having one wedding that won't be recognized by the state of California, why have two?
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  • sustotsustot member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    My wife and I live in Tennesse where we know gay marriage will not pass any time soon.  We went to Boston this past July and were married and are having the larger ceremony with family/friends later next year - like you, we want the fairy tale wedding.  Here is a link with info for getting married in Mass. as well as the City Hall link.  Don't hesitate to call City Hall - I had no problems getting thru and they were very friendly.

    http://lesbianlife.about.com/od/weddingplanning/ht/MarryinMass.htm
    http://www.cityofboston.gov/registry/
  • nicknuttncnicknuttnc member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011

    I am getting married in NC and having a legal wedding in NYC a little before my actual big wedding here. You can have anything you want in NC if you have lot of friends here. If you have any questions about anything let me know. I am enclosing a link for the planner we are using in NYC if it helps.....

    http://www.gaylesbianweddings4u.net/NY_Gay_Weddings.html

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  • angybanezangybanez member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    If you need help planning a wedding in NYC contact Celadon and Celery. I've photographed their weddings and events and they are excellent! I also know a few officiants, venues it depends on what you're looking for? But Celadon or any planners can help with that. Other planners I know are Lulu's event, no limit events, AART who are all run by wonderful people.
  • I agree, I would start by looking at city hall and the state regulations where you'd be interested in getting married.  We're doing something similar, we're getting married in Boston in August, and I'm overwhelmed as to where to start, however once I did, it snowballed and I found that it's much easier than what I thought. Best of luck to you!
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