NEED ADVICE QUICK

jericamegan06 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:a6ccb70c-7541-4c39-9fe1-a132a9a4df89">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]No you dont need to ask him if its okay. if her cares that he has to spend 2 mins walking up and down the aisle with a 13 year old than he is rude IMO. I am the only one who wasnt confused by her original post? PS I think its a great idea to have everyone meet. I wanted to do this but no one's schedules would match up : (
Posted by DanielleZZ[/QUOTE]

Thanks so much!! i loved this comment!! made me feel much better :)

Beachy730 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:a806e87a-82d1-4fdc-a2fb-e4d3168c8a9e">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK : Thanks so much!! i loved this comment!! made me feel much better :)
Posted by jericamegan06[/QUOTE]

Figures, you like the one comment that gives you praise about something. Yet ignore the ones that tell you that its fine for them to walk together.

jericamegan06 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:cc8ead95-c0f7-4640-b4d5-2a7735905920">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK : That makes no sense, I have a nagging suspicion that you demoted him.
Posted by mgietler76[/QUOTE]

i didnt, i wouldnt do that! i called him and said exactly what happened, and said all the options and he was very happy i was honest with him. and yes my fiance knows..... we have talked about this for the past 2 weeks, and we would not ask people to be in the wedding that were not our closest friends. do yall not feel close enough to your friends that you wouldnt just be able to call them and let them know what is going on?

mgietler76 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:a806e87a-82d1-4fdc-a2fb-e4d3168c8a9e">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK : Thanks so much!! i loved this comment!! made me feel much better :)
Posted by jericamegan06[/QUOTE]

Yeeeaah, so are you going to un-demote him than?

jericamegan06 · November 2010

i dont think that them walking together is a bad thing, but if i was a 25 year old guy and i was walking with a 13 year old girl i would feel a little uncomfortable also...... and i did like her comment... she didnt praise me

No you dont need to ask him if its okay. if her cares that he has to spend 2 mins walking up and down the aisle with a 13 year old than he is rude IMO. I am the only one who wasnt confused by her original post? PS I think its a great idea to have everyone meet. I wanted to do this but no one's schedules would match up : (
Posted by DanielleZZ

she said the same thing everyone else did... just wasnt so rude about it!!!!! she said that it was fine!!! that they could walk together, and that if he had a problem with it, that was rude!!! READ A LITTLE MORE CAREFULLY!

mgietler76 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:55d546ee-ab69-4723-a80b-565364eb7c9c">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK : i didnt, i wouldnt do that! i called him and said exactly what happened, and said all the options and he was very happy i was honest with him. and yes my fiance knows..... we have talked about this for the past 2 weeks, and we would not ask people to be in the wedding that were not our closest friends. do yall not feel close enough to your friends that you wouldnt just be able to call them and let them know what is going on?
Posted by jericamegan06[/QUOTE]

I don't see why it's such a huge deal to begin with honestly. If he is such a good friend than IMO he would have no issue with spending 30 seconds walking with someone younger than him.

Beachy730 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:55d546ee-ab69-4723-a80b-565364eb7c9c">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK : i didnt, i wouldnt do that! i called him and said exactly what happened, and said all the options and he was very happy i was honest with him. and yes my fiance knows..... we have talked about this for the past 2 weeks, and we would not ask people to be in the wedding that were not our closest friends. do yall not feel close enough to your friends that you wouldnt just be able to call them and let them know what is going on?
Posted by jericamegan06[/QUOTE]

I feel close enough to my friends that I wouldn't have one demote himself solely because he wasn't comfortable with who he was walking with.

Another solution: The guys stand at the front of the altar or wherever with the groom. The BMs walk in alone. After the B&G exit, the BMs alternate walking solo, BM, GM, BM, GM, etc. And no WP dance. Done. Then you have who you want standing up for you, and nobody got demoted or is uncomfortable.

emilyinchile · November 2010

So is he 25 or 17?

jericamegan06 · November 2010

Yeeeaah, so are you going to un-demote him than?

I DIDNT DEMOTE HIM... I ASKED WHAT HE WANTED TO DO AND HE TOLD ME THE TRUTH... HONESTLY IT KINDA HURT MY FEELINGS THAT HE DIDNT WANT TO BE A GROOMSMEN, BUT I WANT MY FRIENDS TO FEEL COMFORTABLE AT OUR WEDDING JUST LIKE I WANT TO FEEL COMFORTABLE THERE!

Beachy730 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:f5018c18-025d-4987-8656-da4e5377a017">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]i dont think that them walking together is a bad thing, but if i was a 25 year old guy and i was walking with a 13 year old girl i would feel a little uncomfortable also...... and i did like her comment... she didnt praise me No you dont need to ask him if its okay. if her cares that he has to spend 2 mins walking up and down the aisle with a 13 year old than he is rude IMO. I am the only one who wasnt confused by her original post? <strong>PS I think its a great idea to have everyone meet. I wanted to do this but no one's schedules would match up</strong> : ( Posted by DanielleZZ she said the same thing everyone else did... just wasnt so rude about it!!!!! she said that it was fine!!! that they could walk together, and that if he had a problem with it, that was rude!!! READ A LITTLE MORE CAREFULLY!
Posted by jericamegan06[/QUOTE]

First of all, DON'T YELL AT ME. DO YOU LIKE IT?

You said yourself, she said the same thing as everyone else. So I had to assume that you loved the bolded part.

BTW, you're posting on a board where we get the same questions lots of times. We don't sugarcoat our answers just to be nice.

jericamegan06 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:ea23e6c1-628a-4fb8-be7b-5d5e05ed236d">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]So is he 25 or 17?
Posted by emilyinchile[/QUOTE]

HE IS 25 SHE IS 13

someone else said something about being 17 walking with a 35 yr old... thats how 17 got involved in all this!

zippityb · November 2010

I think it's better that they don't walk together, lest your wedding make the tabloids.

doctabroccoli · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:9404cc75-497e-4339-83a3-21fd9479424f">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK : HE IS 25 SHE IS 13 someone else said something about being 17 walking with a 35 yr old... thats how 17 got involved in all this!
Posted by jericamegan06[/QUOTE]

Oy vey. So why are you so opposed to the idea of having them NOT walk together like two of us suggested and alternate bm, gm? Did you present him with that option? Did you think he may have demoted himself because he felt it's what you wanted?

Beachy730 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:e909e78d-d42f-4fa4-b017-68baf54df5e8">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]Yeeeaah, so are you going to un-demote him than? I DIDNT DEMOTE HIM... I ASKED WHAT HE WANTED TO DO AND HE TOLD ME THE TRUTH... HONESTLY IT KINDA HURT MY FEELINGS THAT HE DIDNT WANT TO BE A GROOMSMEN, BUT I WANT MY FRIENDS TO FEEL COMFORTABLE AT OUR WEDDING JUST LIKE I WANT TO FEEL COMFORTABLE THERE!
Posted by jericamegan06[/QUOTE]

Yelling at people in caps lock isn't going to make you seem any better, or make people want to help you. I'm still considering it being demoted because you offered a situation, and basically said you can do this, or not be a GM. You didn't leave much choice. So while you didn't say "You are no longer a GM you are now an usher," its one in the same to me in this case.

emilyinchile · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:9404cc75-497e-4339-83a3-21fd9479424f">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK : HE IS 25 SHE IS 13 someone else said something about being 17 walking with a 35 yr old... thats how 17 got involved in all this!
Posted by jericamegan06[/QUOTE]

Ok. Please try to write more clearly. Your posts are barely intelligible - saying that 17 and 13 was a big difference made it seem like that was the age difference between the people in your WP. Take an extra second to read what you've written and ask yourself if it would make sense if you didn't know what you were thinking.

jericamegan06 · November 2010

yall dont do anything just to be nice!! some of yall are super nice.... others... not so much!! but it doesnt matter! i called him back and told him the alternating bm gm bm gm bm gm and told him how much it means to both FI and myself for him to be a GM and he laughed and said he will do whatever i want him to do!! even if he is walking with the FG

I HAVE AWESOME FRIENDS!!!

Bubbalub · November 2010

Wow. The combination of CAPS LOCK YELLING, poor grammar and multiple exclamation points is hurting my eyes. Calm down.

jericamegan06 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:812fe32e-26ff-4c0b-b75c-345d5a173d40">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK : First of all, DON'T YELL AT ME. DO YOU LIKE IT? You said yourself, she said the same thing as everyone else. So I had to assume that you loved the bolded part. BTW, you're posting on a board where we get the same questions lots of times. We don't sugarcoat our answers just to be nice.
Posted by dnbeach12[/QUOTE]

I JUST LOVED THAT SHE WASNT A COMPLETE..... BRAT..... ABOUT EVERYTHING. RESPECT GETS YOU A LONG WAY...

doctabroccoli · November 2010

Glad we could help. Just don't be so trigger happy next time with the speed dial, mmm kay?

Beachy730 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:5cedaebe-f004-46cd-b5de-11566f600ec9">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]yall dont do anything just to be nice!! some of yall are super nice.... others... not so much!! but it doesnt matter! i called him back and told him the alternating bm gm bm gm bm gm and told him how much it means to both FI and myself for him to be a GM and he laughed and said he will do whatever i want him to do!! even if he is walking with the FG :) I HAVE AWESOME FRIENDS!!!
Posted by jericamegan06[/QUOTE]

We tend to not be nice when people give good advice and the poster says "I did what I want anyways." If you would have read more into the posts before doing what you wanted anyways, you could have saved the phone calls. I'm glad you saw the light and called him back. But next time, please realize we often have valid points and good alternative ideas before biting our heads off for disagreeing with you.

jericamegan06 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:fbc431a9-d8a8-4eb9-b3a7-d25cf8b3526c">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK : Oy vey. So why are you so opposed to the idea of having them NOT walk together like two of us suggested and alternate bm, gm? Did you present him with that option? Did you think he may have demoted himself because he felt it's what you wanted?
Posted by doctabroccoli[/QUOTE]

yes i gave him options... i told him exactly what we could do and he said hed rather be an usher...

Ghoti · November 2010

I'm thinkin that the OP isn't much older than the JR Bridesmaid...

Beachy730 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:9f5e3727-f6f9-4a55-8e21-54863a5d7b89">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK : I JUST LOVED THAT SHE WASNT A COMPLETE..... BRAT..... ABOUT EVERYTHING. RESPECT GETS YOU A LONG WAY...
Posted by jericamegan06[/QUOTE]

I'm assuming you meant to call me a bitch. Thats fine. And I would really appreciate if you stopped using the caps lock. We aren't 12 years old, and its just annoying.

jericamegan06 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:e2ba25d9-a9a4-4a4c-b9fd-26301ca3781d">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK : Ok. Please try to write more clearly. Your posts are barely intelligible - saying that 17 and 13 was a big difference made it seem like that was the age difference between the people in your WP. Take an extra second to read what you've written and ask yourself if it would make sense if you didn't know what you were thinking.
Posted by emilyinchile[/QUOTE]

well i understand where you would be confused, but if you would have read a little farther up a girl said she was 17 walking with a 35 yr old and i said yeah but 17 and 13 is a big difference..... 4 yrs is not i know... but 12 yrs is

zippityb · November 2010

This is a wedding party, not a makeout party. I don't get why age difference would matter.

Ash2985 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:d2e8645e-3eef-451a-b1c6-e175d57b7c7e">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK : well i understand where you would be confused, but if you would have read a little farther up a girl said she was 17 walking with a 35 yr old and i said yeah but 17 and 13 is a big difference..... 4 yrs is not i know... but 12 yrs is
Posted by jericamegan06[/QUOTE]
I don't see why age really matters when you're walking down an aisle next to someone. This concept is really WTF to me.

Ghoti · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:acb97d9f-9c67-4a31-8b68-ecda2c06cfee">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]This is a wedding party, not a makeout party. I don't get why age difference would matter.
Posted by zippityb[/QUOTE]

Didn't you hear? You're supposed to play Spin the Bottle and 7 minutes in Heaven with your BP.

Beachy730 · November 2010

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_need-advice-quick?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:a59d9578-d127-4204-bc68-696404ef4dcePost:d2e8645e-3eef-451a-b1c6-e175d57b7c7e">Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: NEED ADVICE QUICK : well i understand where you would be confused, but if you would have read a little farther up a girl said she was 17 walking with a 35 yr old and i said yeah but 17 and 13 is a big difference..... 4 yrs is not i know... but 12 yrs is
Posted by jericamegan06[/QUOTE]

The difference between 17 and 35 is 18 years. Between 13 and 25 is 12. So thats actually a much shorter age difference.

doctabroccoli · November 2010

She's already demoted someone in the past (posted on E a couple weeks ago):

http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_bridesmaidzilla

jericamegan06 · November 2010

where you are mentally at 12 and anything over, is completly different! although... i feel like yall are proving me wrong with that!

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