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Wedding Etiquette Forum

Invitation wording

I am sending some information to the woman designing our invitations and want some opinions on the wording. I am finding conflicting advice on which of my (divorced parents) to list first. Some sources say you list the mother while other say list the person who is contributing more (which in this case is my father.) Also, FI's parents are also contributing and we don't want to leave them out.  Here are two options I have so far.  Also, since the ceremony will be outside, weather permitting, where to I indicate to guests the back-up location incase of rain?  On one of the inserts?

FYI: Glen & Kathy is my mom and step-dad, Curtis is my dad, and Dennis & Carla are Fi's parents.

 

Glen & Katherine last name
 and Curtis last name

Request the pleasure of your companyAt the marriage of their daughter

Rebecca Renei Name

to

John Gravatt Name

 Son of Dennis & Carla Last name

 Saturday, the twenty-eighth of MayTwo thousand and elevenAt Half after four o’clock Bloch Park47th Street & Roanoke ParkwayKansas City, MissouriDinner & Dancing to follow

or...

Glen & Katherine last name
 and Curtis last name
Together with Dennis & Carla last nameRequest the pleasure of your companyAt the marriage of their children Rebecca Renei Nameand John Gravatt NameSaturday, the twenty-eighth of MayTwo thousand and elevenAt Half after four o’clock Bloch Park47th Street & Roanoke ParkwayKansas City, MissouriDinner & Dancing to follow


 
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Re: Invitation wording

  • Uh oh, the formatting got messed up.

    Sorry!
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  • How about just "bride and groom, together with their parents"?
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_invitation-wording-32?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:532ad48e-f1e6-4ca3-a5bf-7221eef78818Post:46a3d5da-0614-43d3-85c8-9f16ca0aa5ab">Re: Invitation wording</a>:
    [QUOTE]How about just "bride and groom, together with their parents"?
    Posted by The Mel and Todd Show[/QUOTE]

    Yeah, that is an option. I just feel we "owe" them more recognition for all they are doing for us.
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  • I think the first option is good with a few tweaks. People who say your mom's name should be first are correct, the woman is listed first. Also there should be no "and" between your mom and step-dad and your dad. The "and" links them together and they don't need it since they have no formal connection (except you, but that doesn't count in invitation land).

    Also, I think that if your parents names and his parents names are listed you and your FI should only put your first and middle names on the invitation. The only reason I can think of to put your last names is if they are completely and totally different than both of your parents.

    I also think you are supposed to leave the "and" out of the year. It should be Two thousand eleven.
  • Anna, so if we went with the first option are you said to put:

    Glen & Katherine Lastname
    Curtis Lastname

    Request the pleasure or your company...

    Do I say 'together with'? It sounds funny without some sort of "linkage" with my parents. I know they are divorced so many "and" isn't appropriate but is there something else that is?
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  • Yes what you have is correct. I know it sounds a little weird, but that is the "right" way to do it. My parents are divorced also and this is what we are doing on our invitation. Just keep in mind you are the only one who will really be scrutinizing this wording, people you invite will probably just skim this and look at the date/time/location. I also think that if you put "together with" or something like that it just adds another line and you already have a lot going on with your invitiation. I also suggest you send a proof to all parental figures just to make sure no one is going to freak out about the placement of their name or something.

    To be honest though, if it really bothers you just put "and." I doubt anyone will think that your your mom and dad remarried and are now in a three-way marriage with your step-dad. Barely anyone even knows these rules anymore, the only reason I do is because I used to work in a stationary store.


  • Your mother's name comes before your father's name, but also the woman's name comes before the man's name when you're not using titles, so:

    Katherine and Glen

    NOT Glen and Katherine
  • Anna and ten are right.  This is the EXACT setup we had with our invitation.  
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  • Katherine and Glen, yes.

    I like the first one (it's more traditional), although I also see the second one a lot, so I wouldn't really bat an eye at it. Why don't you run it by all three sets of parents? If any of them make a stink about the order of names, just change it. If they approve, just print them up with a clear conscience. 
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