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FMIL issue

NicoleD429NicoleD429
in Wedding Woes
I am currently studying to take my nursing boards and working part time.  My fiance and I planned on waiting to buy a house until I had a full time nursing job, however an amazing deal on a house kind of just fell in our lap.  Now every time I am around his mother she questions me on getting a second job and hurrying things along.  The other day she handed me print outs of job listings that have nothing to do with the healthcare field.

I am trying my best here to study and pass my boards.  I don't want to feel rushed and I don't need the added stress she's putting on me.  My fiance always tells his mom to stop and they have argued over this many times but she doesn't stop.  I have no clue what to do.  Any advice ladies?
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Re: FMIL issue

  • jojobrnjojobrn member
    Eighth Anniversary 2500 Comments 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    Ignore her. Also, don't take too long to take your boards, the sooner, the better in terms of freshness of the material you learned in school.
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  • HeffalumpHeffalump member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011
    What do you say to her when she dumps these stacks of job postings on you?
    �
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  • hmonkeyhmonkey member
    Ninth Anniversary 10000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    just say "thank you" and don't offer excuses.  there will be no excuse that she considers "good enough" so stop offering them.

    and if you boot her out of the house, that might be a dealbreaker for her.  just saying. 
    image
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  • ReturnOfKuusReturnOfKuus member
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    Say "Of course your advice isn't appreciated - you give bad advice!"
    image
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  • jojobrnjojobrn member
    Eighth Anniversary 2500 Comments 100 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_fmil-issue?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:4cd74ab7-983d-438e-9382-683135717c05Post:41989d62-e1ef-425f-b60c-4d58d689f58d">Re: FMIL issue</a>:
    [QUOTE]Thanks for the boards advice...I know.  I had to have surgery this summer *surgery I put off the entire time in school) so I feel so far behind.  As for ignore her, I do, but would it be too much if I asked her to leave our home if she can't control herself?
    Posted by NicoleD429[/QUOTE]

    <div>Yeah, booting her out of your house won't help the situation. Just say thanks, put them aside, and get back to studying.</div>
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  • *Barbie**Barbie* member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    just smile and thank her for the postings and toss them when she leaves. In terms of questions re: your job status: "I'll be a full-time RN after I pass my boards, until then I am focused on studying." then change the subject. Lather, rinse, repeat.

    My MIL got on me when we decided to move cross country (1560miles away from her, as opposed to the 2.5miles in our last home) - she kept saying to me "why don't you just find another local job? I heard ____ is hiring." - yes, it was annoying, but i always gave her the same answer "I'm not interested in looking here. the TX job is a fantastic opportunity and we're both very excited at the possibilities" and then changed the subject. It took us buying a house in TX, but after almost a year of her bugging me, she finally dropped it. 

    ... it may take you passing the boards, but eventually she'll give up.
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  • MrsChiklisMrsChiklis
    100 Comments
    edited December 2011

    Oooh, I have an idea.  Tell her to mind her own mother fvcking business.  And do it just like that.
    Hell, people need excitement in their lives. 

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  • ReturnOfKuusReturnOfKuus member
    Eighth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    lol!  I can't say I disagree.
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  • skippylouwhoskippylouwho member
    1000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    Just say thank you.   then either don't say anything else or change the subject. Don't let her engage you in anything you don't want to talk about. if she continues, leave.


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