No Kids Allowed Movement Spreading

loveshine1 · July 2011

http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/parenting/the-no-kids-allowed-movement-is-spreading-2516110/

WDYT?

Even as a parent, I find noisy little howler monkeys irritating. Normal kid noise is fine, but screeching and running around a restaurant or a store like it's a playground is not.

Cant_wait! · July 2011

I'm not going to lie, I love this. I don't mind well behaved children, it's the screaming ones whose parents don't discipline that I hate, and I also hate their parents. For example, at Harry potter someone brought their infant (maybe a year old? Not walking) and at first I was like "if that thing screams, I'm throwing popcorn at it." but it didn't scream, and when it made a noise the dad took it outside. Good parent. I didn't mind that child being there at all.
Then on the other end there are the stroller users who park their stroller full of screaming child in my walking path at the great mall. Hate them, hate their parent, hate that stroller. They ruin it for everyone.

mrsconn23 · July 2011

I try really hard to never be *that* asshole with the unruly kids. I'm probably tougher on the kiddo sometimes than need be, but he doesn't act a fool in public for the most part.

Now I will say that I was on my flight from TPA to home and DefConn got the slightest bit fussy and this guy two rows ahead of me and across the aisle whipped his head around so fast to give me the stink-eye, I thought it might fall off. He wasn't that loud and I was trying to calm him. He went back to sleep w/in five minutes.

Those people piss me off. Give me a chance to correct the situation. Thanks.

DG1 · July 2011

I agree there are kid-appropriate places and kid-inappropriate places. I will not bring my kid to morton's steakhouse.

But there is already a limited window of time I have to do ANYTHING. If I have to get a babysitter every time I need to buy groceries, I'll basically have to start living off of canned goods and UHT milk I order on amazon.

And what about single parents? Parents with deployed spouses? I, at least, have the possibility of leaving kids at home with my husband. Not everyone does.

And, of course, this discussion quickly degrades into "good parents don't let their kids disturb anyone in the universe, EVAR" and "people whose kids make noise are HORRIBLE HORRIBLE PEOPLE who never should have bred in the first place." And that really infuriates me.

My kid is 2. Sometimes he throws tantrums. This morning, he was hysterical for 20 minutes because he didn't get to eat his Kashi TLC cereal bar in the car on the way to daycare. (Because HE didn't decide he wanted it until we were in the fcking parking lot.) It doesn't make me an awful person or my kid a pitiful delinquent beyond all help.

Urgh. I could rant all day, but then I'd need BP meds.

*Barbie* · July 2011

i don't see an issue with banning/limiting children within reason. i get annoyed with kids running around/screaming/misbehaving etc. in public places - and have disciplined them on omore than one occasion when i saw that the parents were doing nothing to reign them in.

i think some suggestions i have seen take things too far - why should i, as a parent of a well behaved child, be subject to other people with misbehaving children moreso than anyone else, just because i have a kid? (in response to an article i saw that suggested families with children section on airplanes.)

there's a difference between an infant crying during takoff because their ears hurt, and a toddler who spends a 3 hour flight screaming because they can and kicking the back of your seat.

when can we start banning other annoying people from public places?

Cant_wait! · July 2011

huh. The way I see it: I chose to be a dog owner. I understand that not everyone LIKES dogs, so I'm not going to bring my dog everywhere I go, because some people might not appreciate having it there. I'll make other arrangements for my dog.
Obviously, kids are not dogs and not on the same level, but it's the best example I could think of.
And it's only in not kid appropriate places that I get annoyed with kids. I wouldn't go into a Chuck E. Cheese and bitch that there were children in there, but do get annoyed at restaurants and grocery stores. Kids get bored, yo. Don't bring them couponing.

*Barbie* · July 2011

kids shouldn't be allowed in movie theaters unless it's a kids' movie anyways. i would NEVER take my almost 9mo to the movies, and she'd likely sleep most of the way through. I HATE people who bring kids to movies - if they don't have the attention span to sit quietly for 2 hours and watch the movie, they shouldn't be there.

we took Wolverine to some higher end restaurants when she wasan infant and would sleep through the meal - now that she's much more awake and active, we would be less likely to do this, and would take her out/leave if she got fussy.

it's sad that some crappy parents are ruining it for everyone.

DG1 · July 2011

Dude. If your grocery store has carts that are shaped like fire trucks and spaceships, it is a kid-friendly grocery store. If you don't like it, go to the fancypants places and buy your escargot.

Ditto for restaurants. If the restaurant hands out crayons and balloons at the front door, it is a kid-friendly restaurant. If you don't like it, drag your fancypants ass to a high-end steakhouse.

ReturnOfKuus · July 2011

I don't think normal kid noise is fine, and would be delighted if there were actually establishments around here that were not kid-friendly.

loveshine1 · July 2011

Kid Friendly does not mean "We and the patrons of this store/restaurant LOVE screaming, ill-behaved children. We encourage you to let them do whatever they please."

MinM · July 2011

I'm with Kuus.

mrsconn23 · July 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_kids-allowed-movement-spreading?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:d83c6dae-1d47-46de-8d2a-79ebb8673e90Post:c5f8c604-0f14-402b-ad6a-7a9051734953">Re: No Kids Allowed Movement Spreading</a>:
[QUOTE]Kid Friendly does not mean "We and the patrons of this store/restaurant LOVE screaming, ill-behaved children. We encourage you to let them do whatever they please."
Posted by loveshine1[/QUOTE]

This.

I've always been a fan of "Children should be seen and not heard."

*Barbie* · July 2011

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_kids-allowed-movement-spreading?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:d83c6dae-1d47-46de-8d2a-79ebb8673e90Post:2c85cd3a-e220-422f-b3e5-9e42dbfa3d8f">Re: No Kids Allowed Movement Spreading</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't think normal kid noise is fine, and would be delighted if there were actually establishments around here that were not kid-friendly.
Posted by ReturnOfKuus[/QUOTE]

Monroville isn't that far. Have you ever eaten at the place there that just banned kids? May need to get my parents to babysit and take DK next time we're in town.... or go to church brewworks. yum.

AuntFlo · July 2011

Our kid is incredibly well behaved about 99% of the time. That 1% of the time sucks, is not planned for, cannot be prevented and usually can't be stopped. We have left places when that happens - but if you're alone, you really can't run out on a check, you know?
So yeah, I get that loud, obnoxious, misbehaving kids are annoying as hell to people that aren't related, and even sometime to people that are.
I think the bigger point that people are missing is, how are children supposed to learn how to behave in public situations if they aren't exposed to it???
Bad parents should be banned, not kids.

ReturnOfKuus · July 2011

I think what people don't get, sometimes, is that not everyone is concerned with teaching kids to behave in public. Sometimes (okay, all the time for some of us) people just want to go somewhere and not be whacked in the shins by the little anklebiters and their mini-carts, or not have their ears assaulted with loud voices only slightly lower-pitched than a dog whistle. We don't want kids to be nowhere ever, just to have places where we can go where they just aren't. Thjere are so many places that cater to kids and people with kids; is it really so much to ask to have places that cater to the childless, too?

Barbie, I've never been to that place in Monroeville, but I should probably give it a try. Are kids not allowed at CBW? I never see them there, ever, but I thought that was just because microbreweries aren't the sort of places you'd think to bring a kid. But now that I think about it, this doesn't usually stop people, which is why there are starting to be overtly childfree establishments.

*Barbie* · July 2011

i don't know about CBW and not having kids there - but they have yummy food (pierogie pizza!), and DK likes trying different beers. he's never gone.

ReturnOfKuus · July 2011

We should go as a foursome, then. Their cream soda is to die for, too. And they're one of the few restaurants around here that know to cook salmon medium to medium rare.

rascal17 · July 2011

This article just...arrghhhh.. I cant even put it in words. I have a 2 year old and even though I am trying to teach him how to behave he has his moments, and every kid does. And a lot of parents only have limited time to go out and do certain tasks and if the one time i can make it to the grocery store and I have to leave my kid with a complete stranger I would be pissed and throw a hissy fit myself and walk out.

I do understand certain situations and that there are certain places that kids shouldnt be but there are also places that you shouldnt be allowed to ban them ex grocery stores.

I completely agree with DG1. If you dont want to deal with my kid, go pay bigger bucks for a fancier place where I wouldnt dream or afford to take mine. Also if you dont want to hear my kid a theater go at 10pm when he will be asleep.

ETA: I am one of those parents who will try to take my kid out of the situation when he gets unruley if at all possible. I have left movies early, got my food to go, put clothes back on the rack and left. I know there are some parents out there who dont do anything when their child acts up but us others shouldnt be punished and discriminated because of it.

LizziebeeUT · July 2011

I think grocery stores and stuff like that is a little extreme.

though I see nothing wrong with movie theatres, resturaunts and such. I know waaaaaay too many people who feel their decision to have children should be everyone else's problem.

I did this self help seminar last year, and when its over they have a big graduation thing where there's lots of tears and testemonials and stuff, its a pretty dramatic day. A couple, who actually both served as moderators for it have five children (all under 10), and she was pregnant with her sixth. They brought two of their children and completely ignored them. They were running around the room, would climb on chairs, push each other over, just being a HUGE distraction while people were trying to bear their soul. It pissed me off so bad.

redheadtmk · July 2011

You can usually tell the difference between a spoiled brat and a terrible two's/tired/cranky/ didnt get my nap today child by the way the parents handle the noise. I want to tazer the parents who come into my work and spend 10-15 mintues saying "if you dont stop you are going to be in trouble" and then bribe the kid with something. or just let them cry for the whole 1/2 hour they are in the store. or those that yell, cuss, and tell thier kids to shut up. Clearly they learned that yelling is the appropriate way to communicate.

VarunaTT · July 2011

I"m with Kuus on this one. Why is it so wrong for someplace to cater to the crowd who doesn't want/like children around? It's not a sin to not like kids in general, whether they're well-behaved or not.

SarahDarah · January 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_kids-allowed-movement-spreading?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:d83c6dae-1d47-46de-8d2a-79ebb8673e90Post:39d587da-36c3-4fb3-8d12-9d5e726753cc">Re: No Kids Allowed Movement Spreading</a>:
[QUOTE]huh. The way I see it: I chose to be a dog owner. I understand that not everyone LIKES dogs, so I'm not going to bring my dog everywhere I go, because some people might not appreciate having it there. I'll make other arrangements for my dog. Obviously, kids are not dogs and not on the same level, but it's the best example I could think of. And it's only in not kid appropriate places that I get annoyed with kids. I wouldn't go into a Chuck E. Cheese and bitch that there were children in there, but do get annoyed at restaurants and grocery stores. Kids get bored, yo. Don't bring them couponing.
Posted by Cant_wait![/QUOTE]
I LOVE THIS! I was trying to explain to my fiance that his stubborn aunt who is INSISTING on bringing her toddler grandson with her to the wedding and absolutely refusing our on-site babysitting service (10 feet from the damn reception) because she's "very attached"- I have cousins who have dogs instead of kids, and they take them everywhere with them- but they're not bringing them to the wedding. I have a dog who I'm "very attached" to, and I worry about what to do with him during the wedding- but I'm STILL not bringing him! My fiance insists that it's totally different- I don't think it's THAT different. Don't get me wrong, I adore kids and plan to have them someday. I just don't want them at my wedding.

kmmssg · January 2012

I was a single mom when DD's were quite little and I remember having that tiny window to shop and do whatever. I also left places early, got my food to go, cut the grocery trip short when they threw a fit. It was always followed by a Come to Jesus meeting and they knew I meant business. Were they perfect after those meetings every time? Heck no. Did they have any doubt in the world there would be a meeting in the car as soon as I could get them there? Nope?

There are great parents out there who are teaching their little ones how to act and there seem to be more parents who don't do their job. A couple of weeks ago I was in the store and there were these parents and a couple of kids. The little one didn't want to ride in the cart so they let him out. OK. Then he proceeds to throw himself on the floor in front of carts and other people no less than 6 times in one aisle because he couldn't have whatever it was he just grabbed. They did nothing. I"m sorry but one of those parents should have been carrying his little butt outside for a little meeting. Never did a thing.

I really notice when someone is really parenting their child and I greatly admire it. I notice when you are trying to deal with your crying 2 year old in the grocery instead of just letting him scream up and down the aisles while you ignore him.

Right after the holidays I was in the grocery (seem to live there) and an extremely young couple had their little girl in the shopping cart. The parents were maybe 20ish. The little girl started whining and grunting and holding her hands out to her dad because she wanted out of the cart. They stopped the cart, quietly asked her to use her manners (she couldn't have been 2), and she politely said "please, Daddy!". Impressed my socks off.

I think it is sad that the good parenting isn't nearly as evident in public as the careless parenting. So many times it isn't that a child needs a Come to Jesus meeting, it is that they can't settle themselves down, are crying, and they just need Mom or Dad to stop what they are doing and help them out a bit. A little nurturing goes a long way.

I had little kids and I understand that they don't always act the way you want them to in public, the grocery, etc. What I won't buy off on is having to listen to your kid scream for the 45 minutes I have to spend getting the weeks groceries because you are ignoring him/her.

Kudos to the great parents but the careless parents are creating a little population of brats that are ruining it for everyone else.

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