A little backstory: MIL and FIL had a nasty divorce many years ago and have not had a good relationship since, even though they have both moved on and married other people. She may or may not have grounds to have him arrested, which is why he lives out of state and never comes around. Basically the whole thing is a mess to the point where he hasn't seen FIs younger brother for 15years and did not attended the funeral of FIs other brother, his own son, because everyone was afraid of what FMIL would do. Obviously we want FFIL at our wedding, so FI has decided to have a sit down with his mom about this. We decided I would sit this one out, even though I would like to be there to support FI and present a united front to FMIL. Here is the advice I gave FI: Don't ask her permission for FFIL to attend. Tell her he would like to come and she needs to be ok with that. Don't make this about the past and who may have done what to who. Get some.kind of commitment out of her that our wedding won't be n episode of Cops or Springer. If she tries to make it about us picking sides tell her we want them both there, peacefully, they don't even have to interact. Be prepared to tell her that if something goes down because of her, our relationship with her will be seriously damaged. I know this is long but I can't figure out how to make it shorter and still make sense. Does anyone have any advice for us about this situation?
