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Pregnant bridesmaid question

Ariane ZoharAriane Zohar
First Comment
in Wedding Party
Hi,
I'm not actually the bride... I'm one of the bridesmaids and I hope you can help!
The bride (this is a family wedding) has asked those of us in the wedding party to go to the bridal store to get measured for the bridesmaid dress by this weekend if possible. However, I am 11 weeks pregnant and we haven't told anyone yet!  The lady who owns the store actually knows the bride's mother and the bride herself very well and I am worried that if I tell her that I'm pregnant (we're planning on telling once the 1st trimester is through in a few weeks), she'll mention it to the bride!

Is there a way to work around this? For example, if I siimply ask the lady to order something a few sizes bigger for me, should that be enough or does she need to know exactly why (as if she wouldn't figure it out LOL)?

Thanks!
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Re: Pregnant bridesmaid question

  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I have a few questions:

    1) When is the wedding?
    2) Would you be OK telling just the bride this weekend?

    The reason I ask about the date of the wedding is that you may not be able to fit into the chosen dress depending on how far along you will be at the time of the wedding.   One of my BMs was appro 5 months pregnant at my wedding and most stores don't recommend trying to alter a dress if you're going to be more than 6 mos.   By that point you'll spend a ton on alterations and the dress may not look that great - depending on the style of course.   That leads me to the second portion - would you be OK to tell just the bride this weekend?  

    Believe me - I get the nervousness of the 1st trimester and not wanting people to know until it's over.   The other option is to say that you're 'trying' and want to get the dress a few sizes larger just in case.  
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  • Ariane ZoharAriane Zohar
    First Comment
    Hi,
    Actually, I can't tell at this point. I'm too concerned and have to go through a procedure similiar to an amnio this week, so that's not possible. I have no problem telling the store. It's just the fact that they're friends with the bride's family that concerns me... I can ask them not to tell, but who knows.

    I just called the store to ask them what is the absolute latest I can go and they said Monday, otherwise they'll have to pay for a rush delivery. The wedding is in mid-December and I'll be 6 months.

    Thanks for your advice!
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  • LeguLegu member
    100 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper First Anniversary
    Just FYI... You can not tell how your body will look at 6M. I'm 4.5M now, and look bigger than my friend did at 7M... It's all about how your body adapts. I'm sure you're well aware of that. I would not risk getting a dress this far out, at all. I think best bet would be to explain to the bride that you can not get the dress this far out, and ask if she'd mind you getting something similar in a few weeks time. It's your call if you want to tell her why, or make up some excuse.
    So, maybe things don't always go as planned... Maybe that's okay. I may be alone for now, but my baby boy is on his way, and I wouldn't change a thing.
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  • TaraKeeleyTaraKeeley
    100 Comments
    First of all- congrats on the pregnancy, and good luck with your procedure! I hope all goes perfectly :)

    Second- I'd tell the shop and ask them to keep it a secret. Explain that it's very early, that you're nervous because of some tests you need and don't want to announce it until you know that everything is okay... they should understand :) But I def think you need to tell, because being 6 months preggers will totally affect the style of dress you can or cannot wear.
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  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Then at this point, tell the store OR just tell your friend that you are trying.   She doesn't need to know that it worked!

    And I understand pregnancy nerves.   If you're having a CVS (similar to an amnio) it's relatively simple from what I understand but I also totally understand what it means to be nervous.

    Relax and know you're just a few weeks away from being in your 2nd trimester.   When you feel the kicks it's the best feeling!
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  • Ariane ZoharAriane Zohar
    First Comment
    Thank you all for the great advice! What I'm going to do is tell the store that I'm actively trying and that I would like to be measured for the dress with the assumption that I'll be pregnant. Of course, the math is off by 2 months if I hypothetically get pregnant today, but I can ask them to err on the side of caution in case I carry big (funny, considering I'm 5' tall, but this could work).

    Thank you, and thanks for your good wishes :)
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  • banana468banana468 member
    Knottie Warrior 25000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    Hey, your height has NOTHING to do with how you carry.

    I'm just about 5'4" and I carried all in front and was pretty large.  While pre-pregancy I wore a size 4-6 and was hovering between 125-128 lbs,  DD was 7 lbs 15 oz at birth.

    My SIL is smaller framed than me and she has gained more weight than I have.    Each pregnancy and each person is unique!
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