So I've been working as a long term reading tutor since mid-September. I work with all grades in our school (K-5) and love it but my ultimate goal is to be a teacher. I would say I work most with 1st and 3rd grade. Anyways, one of the 1st grade teachers I work with a few times a week is going out on maternity in March until the end of the school year. I've known this since October and had been going into her classroom whenever I got an opportunity trying to get to know her students and how she runs her classroom. I was hoping to prove myself in a classroom setting.
Well, interviews were today. I was the last interview of the day (out of 4, supposed to be 5). The reading consultant decided not to sit on the committee for my interview because we work side by side all of the time so she didn't want that to affect any decisions. So about 15 mins after my interview when I was leaving the principal called me into his office. He asked how I thought it went and I told him I thought it went well and that it really helped that I know the school, class, etc. He said that there wasn't a need to leave me hanging so he wanted to let me know the decision immediately. He agreed that I did well and he absolutely thinks I could do great in the position, but said I didn't "sell myself" for a long-term teaching position and that there is a candidate that was a better match. He said after my reading interview he knew immediately I was the right person for the job and that I'm doing an amazing job at it. If my position were to permanently open next year I would be a HIGHLY considered candidate (in his words).
This is the first principal I've had that is approachable and that you can have a conversation with. Since my current position was up in the air for a while (the duration of it) we constantly talked about how my goal was to be a teacher and he knows this is a transition position for me so he understands I will be applying for other teaching positions. He's also told me multiple times that he chooses the best match for the position and sometimes it is not the internal candidate so not to get discouraged. I've known this from the get-go and I've always kept that in my mind, especially because I experienced it in a different district. Yet when he told me I didn't get it I was extremely bummed. I really wanted to prove myself to hopefully open myself to future positions. I was also hoping for that increase in pay too because right now I'm pretty much living paycheck to paycheck. All along I've told myself that if I don't get it I'm okay with it because I have a guaranteed job for the rest of the year and that I love what I'm doing, but when the time came to face that it pretty much sucks.
Sorry I just had to babble to hopefully get it off my mind. Let's just say I'm not looking forward to going to work tomorrow because many teachers thought I would get it so I don't want to have to say it multiple times that I didn't. I've decided I'm going to talk to the teacher who is pregnant to ask her advice; she was the only other person in my interview besides the principal. She's been in my shoes many times before so I want to ask her what she suggests now that she's on the other side of the table.