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Wedding Etiquette Forum
Plus Ones
My FI and I decided to only let people bring a guest if they were in a relationship. For these cases, we made a point to include the name of their significant other on the invitation. We'd love to let everyone bring a guest but with a huge family and limited space, it just isn't going to work.
My MOH just commented, "hopefully all the single people don't RSVP for 2 and drive the numbers up." Is this something that should happen? We made a point to just put Mr. John Smith, etc on the invites. I'm starting to worry that more people will RSVP than we have space for.
My MOH just commented, "hopefully all the single people don't RSVP for 2 and drive the numbers up." Is this something that should happen? We made a point to just put Mr. John Smith, etc on the invites. I'm starting to worry that more people will RSVP than we have space for.
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Re: Plus Ones
[QUOTE] What was your basis for "relationship" when you sent out the invites?
Posted by ILoveMilkDuds[/QUOTE]
I know this is probably going to come off tacky, but as a guide we checked facebook. They're all our friends that we've kept in touch with so we generally know who is attached and who's not.
I'm not too concerned if one of two people do it (my friend from 9 hours away sent me a message saying he wanted to bring his new girlfriend-who I just learned about in that message-up for the ride. I'm letting that kind slide), I just don't want to figure out where to sit an extra 50 people.
Should it? No. Will it? Quite possibly.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Plus Ones : I know this is probably going to come off tacky, but as a guide we checked facebook. They're all our friends that we've kept in touch with so we generally know who is attached and who's not. I'm not too concerned if one of two people do it (my friend from 9 hours away sent me a message saying he wanted to bring his new girlfriend-who I just learned about in that message-up for the ride. I'm letting that kind slide), I just don't want to figure out where to sit an extra 50 people.
Posted by kmjarvey[/QUOTE]
A lot of people don't include relationship status on FB.
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Plus Ones : A lot of people don't include relationship status on FB.
Posted by mica178[/QUOTE]
I said it was only a guide. If it was someone we really weren't sure about, we ended up calling them to catch up and get their address so we normally found out that way if it wasn't on online.
Trip to Prague & bring home furbaby when we get back
~ Karen ~
**Wedding/House/Travel Bio **
We gave all of our friends a plus one (and no, we're not having a huge wedding - we were just careful about the guest list). We have friends from lots of different social circles and don't want anyone to feel uncomfortable if they don't know many people.
But, to be honest, most people not already in a relationship aren't bringing dates, even though they were offered the opportunity. Our RSVPs came back in with 80% attending.
I was surprised by who the culprits were. I expected that maybe some of my college friends would have issues with the no guest thing but it turned out that the ones adding people were my parents friends and co-workers! You just have to be firm but polite about it. In our case we had a limit on space and budget and we called people to gently explain this.
[QUOTE]I think it can get a bit iffy on what a real relationship is. I've heard of people doing "no ring, no bring", in other words only spouses and FIs got +1s. Otherwise it kind of becomes like other situations (like children or different social circles) where people may be upset that so and so got to bring a date and they didn't. Plus relationship statuses change, so some of the people you gave a plus 1 to may bring a random person, in which case it isn't fair to others that didn't get a plus 1.
Posted by Patineuse1124[/QUOTE]
This would really upset me. FI and I dated 4.5 years, if either of us got invited to a wedding after the 1-2 year mark and the other was not invited we would have RSVP'd no.
[QUOTE]I think it can get a bit iffy on what a real relationship is. I've heard of people doing "no ring, no bring", in other words only spouses and FIs got +1s. Otherwise it kind of becomes like other situations (like children or different social circles) where people may be upset that so and so got to bring a date and they didn't. <strong>Plus relationship statuses change, so some of the people you gave a plus 1 to may bring a random person, in which case it isn't fair to others that didn't get a plus 1.</strong>
Posted by Patineuse1124[/QUOTE]
If both people were invited by name, this shouldn't happen either.
Trip to Prague & bring home furbaby when we get back
~ Karen ~
**Wedding/House/Travel Bio **
Also, if they are family or friends, why would they be so upset to not bring a plus one? I understand if they're long-term, engaged or married, but really? If you don't know the bride or groom (as a plus one) but your significant other does (or vice versa), why would you want to be in that awkward situation anyway? Just let them go alone - it's not the end of the world.