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Your Post-Wedding Regrets

Previous post made me think about people's wedding regrets.

Normally when people question whether or not they'd miss something like a champagne toast or videography or whatever....people say no. So I'm surprised and intrigued when people say otherwise.

What were your regrets? If any?

From my first wedding, I simply regret being too involved and unrelaxed. Instead of planning every detail, I wish I had left room to be surprised and just enjoy the moments as they came.

Re: Your Post-Wedding Regrets

  • Previous post made me think about people's wedding regrets.

    Normally when people question whether or not they'd miss something like a champagne toast or videography or whatever....people say no. So I'm surprised and intrigued when people say otherwise.

    What were your regrets? If any?

    From my first wedding, I simply regret being too involved and unrelaxed. Instead of planning every detail, I wish I had left room to be surprised and just enjoy the moments as they came.</~root~>
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    You'll never be subject to a cash bar, gap, potluck wedding, or b-list if you marry a Muppet Overlord.

  • AddieCakeAddieCake Beyond the Wall member
    10000 Comments 500 Love Its Fourth Anniversary 25 Answers
    Not doing the groom's cake. Not having our florist add some flowers to the top of the cake when I realized the cake topper was too big b/c it just looked plain w/o anything on top. Not noticing that there was going to be so much yellow with the cake and cupcakes. I would say not making sure my Sole Mates fit my shoes before trying them the day of, but ending up having to go barefoot ended up being one of my favorite things. Not getting a pic of my girls and I actually IN the water closer to the waterfall.
    What did you think would happen if you walked up to a group of internet strangers and told them to get shoehorned by their lady doc?~StageManager14
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  • daria24daria24 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    edited March 2013
    Really the only thing I would change is where our parents sat at the ceremony. They sat on the same side as their son or daughter stood. We should have switched it so that my parents could see my face, H's parents his face.
    image
  • lyndausvilyndausvi Western Slope, Colorado mod
    Moderator Knottie Warrior 10000 Comments 500 Love Its
    Nothing really

    I regret we do not have better pictures.  But the tropical storm with 60 mph wind driven rains kept us from our beach wedding.  You can only do so much under at tent.  Oh well,  not something  we could have changed.






    What differentiates an average host and a great host is anticipating unexpressed needs and wants of their guests.  Just because the want/need is not expressed, doesn't mean it wouldn't be appreciated. 
  • TKzillaTKzilla member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited March 2013
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_your-post-wedding-regrets?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1179ed68-562a-4657-b297-d03409d8fc3dPost:f18fd9d3-3180-4001-a4be-c5613c0bffc5">Re: Your Post-Wedding Regrets</a>:
    [QUOTE]I regret than Gangnam style happened after out wedding.
    Posted by Liatris2010[/QUOTE]

    <div>My dad has been "practicing" his Gangnam style moves. He really wants that to be our father-daughter dance. I'm putting my Big Green Bridezilla foot down on that one. Sorry pops.</div>
    image
  • Weezy56Weezy56 member
    100 Love Its 100 Comments First Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited March 2013
    I regret not having the photographer get a picture of each table to ensure every guest was in a photograph ETA: oh and I regret gaining 10 pounds on my honeymoon. No lie

  • I don't have any big regrets. 

    I wish we would have had someone videotape our ceremony, because from where I was standing, I never got to see our flowergirl go down the aisle, and everything went by so fast I would have liked to re-watch the ceremony at a later time. BUT, I'm still glad we didn't fork over thousands of dollars for a videographer. If we would have someone tape it, it would have been a friend or the DOC or something. 

    And I'm still a little POed at the way my flowers turned out. I wish my florist and I had been on the same page and talked more. They were beautiful, but not what I wanted. 

    Neither of those things are "regrets" per se, but they're still little things that irked me. 
    Daisypath Anniversary tickers
  • I don't have too many. My mum helped us a ton with the planning (and paid - I love my mum), so she really took a lot of the stress off of me.

    I do regret not getting to see everyone. We did table visits during dinner, but some people were already up and walking around or had left (or maybe a few were no-shows?). I think we only missed about 20 people out of 200, but I still wonder if we shouldn't have just had a receiving line or something.

    Something else I regret, though it was totally out of my control, was that our wedding was the night before Sandy starting hitting up the coast and a TON of people had to leave early because their flights were getting cancelled and moved around. Which is probably why we missed seeing them. Everyone got home safe, thank goodness, though one of my bridesmaids was stuck here for a week.

    I'm up in the air about one "regret"; some days it's a relief, but some days I wonder. I didn't end up inviting my father for a ton of reasons, and I know it was best for me and everyone else involved, but I regret not getting that father-daughter dance. Buuuuut I had a GREAT mother-daughter dance that made it all perfect.
  • I REALLY regret not having a videographer. I also regret not going to the host hotel to hang out and visit with my OOT family the evening of the wedding. We had a brunch reception that was over by 2pm and didn't leave for the honeymoon until the next morning. DH felt really strongly about whisking off to a different hotel and spending the afternoon and evening alone. My mom hosted a meet-and-greet the night before the wedding and I did see everyone there, but was preoccupied with wedding details and didn't get to relax and enjoy everyone. DH felt like everyone understood and expected us to take the night to ourselves, but they all knew we weren't leaving until the next morning and I thought we were being rude. I spent the evening feeling guilty.
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  • I wish we would have gotten a few pictures that we didn't end up getting like the GMs and me and a picture of all of our college friends.  

  • QueerFemmeQueerFemme member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited March 2013

    I regret not making my dress my huge splurge.  Everything else was very budget minded, but it was exactly what we wanted.  I had my top budget in mind when I was dress shopping, and I didn't let myself go over that number.  My consultants never showed me any dresses outside of my budget, and I wish I had let them.  I had some extra money to put towards the dress had I found "the" dress, the number was just the arbitrary figure I had in my head based on the rest of our budget.  Now, 6 months later, I see dresses here and as I'm helping a friend plan her wedding, and I still have dress regret.

  • WinstonsGirlWinstonsGirl The Cold North member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    I regret not singing "I was made for Loving you" by Kiss to DH at our karaoke after party.  He nixed it playing as we walked back down the aisle after the ceremony (we had a Hawaiian guitarist anyway, so I doubt it would have worked), but I think the karaoke would have been a perfect joke between the two of us.  
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  • Not making it to our cocktail hour. Everyone says how great it was but I wouldn't know.
     
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  • WinstonsGirlWinstonsGirl The Cold North member
    Knottie Warrior 2500 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited March 2013
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_your-post-wedding-regrets?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1179ed68-562a-4657-b297-d03409d8fc3dPost:127b834b-0b27-49b4-a118-ba39f2d8dd80">Re:Your PostWedding Regrets</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re:Your PostWedding Regrets: H sang "let's get it on" to me at our karaoke after party. Way back when we first started dating, I had begged him to sing something, anything because I just loved hearing him sing. He kept kind of blowing me off and an hour later, his best friend's wife asked him to sing. He said know and she said "please, for meeeee!" So he did and that was the song he sang. I was PISSED. S<strong>o at our wedding, 6 years later, he dedicated it to me and pulled me up to dance with him while he sang it. Not going to lie, it. was. epic.</strong>
    Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div>Very cool!!  I would love DH to do something like that, but he would never sing to me in front of people.  He's too shy.  </div>
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  • MobKazMobKaz Chicago suburbs member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_your-post-wedding-regrets?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1179ed68-562a-4657-b297-d03409d8fc3dPost:af385c21-2362-477d-a971-fba9b21d6b7b">Re:Your PostWedding Regrets</a>:
    [QUOTE]What is this "gangnam style" of which you kids speak?
    Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

    <div>
    </div><div><a href="http://www.youtube.com/user/officialpsy" rel="nofollow">http://www.youtube.com/user/officialpsy</a></div>
  • well, this has been informative. Make sure Shout is on the play list...and maybe get video of folks doing gangham style. (SM, I had no idea what it was until last month when I youtubed it), make a list of photo opps I want in advance, make sure I get food from the cocktail hour (and perhaps some time at the cocktail hour), try on shoes before the wedding date.  Good things to note.

    I appreciate cmgil's comment about getting the dress of your dreams. My family owns a bridal shop, my moms worked there for over 30 years and you wouldn't believe how many people come in there to find something on the rack because they feel they bought the wrong dress. It's so emotional.

    Glad I got a videographer!
  • QueerFemmeQueerFemme member
    5000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 500 Love Its 5 Answers
    edited March 2013
    In<div align="left"> Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_your-post-wedding-regrets?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1179ed68-562a-4657-b297-d03409d8fc3dPost:e8eba27b-9be6-4dc9-9e4a-b29261d939e8">Re:
    Your Post-Wedding Regrets</a>:
    [QUOTE]well, this has been informative. Make
    sure Shout is on the play list...and maybe get video of folks doing gangham
    style. (SM, I had no idea what it was until last month when I youtubed it), make
    a list of photo opps I want in advance, make sure I get food from the cocktail
    hour (and perhaps some time at the cocktail hour), try on shoes before the
    wedding date.  Good things to note. I appreciate cmgil's comment about
    getting the dress of your dreams. My family owns a bridal shop, my moms worked
    there for over 30 years and you wouldn't believe how many people come in there
    to find something on the rack because they feel they bought the wrong dress.
    It's so emotional. Glad I got a videographer!
    Posted by
    MuppetFan[/QUOTE]

    I actually bought a second dress at a sample sale, but it wasn't right either, so I ended up selling it.  I literally made myself insane about my dress for 6 months. the dress I bought just didn't match the vision I had in my head. 

    </div>
  • Suddenly just realized that Gangnam Style might be requested at our reception.  My FI is half Korean and his Korean relatives will be there.  Could be interesting... lol
    image
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_your-post-wedding-regrets?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:14Discussion:1179ed68-562a-4657-b297-d03409d8fc3dPost:f7fbe1de-80e2-46da-b255-a0d884a7745f">Re: Your Post-Wedding Regrets</a>:
    [QUOTE]Suddenly just realized that Gangnam Style might be requested at our reception.  My FI is half Korean and his Korean relatives will be there.  Could be interesting... lol
    Posted by GardenMaven[/QUOTE]

    <div>Start practicing!: <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bjQKCLvtLN0" rel="nofollow">http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bjQKCLvtLN0</a></div>
  • RamonaFlowersRamonaFlowers member
    Eighth Anniversary 500 Love Its 1000 Comments Name Dropper
    edited March 2013
    My biggest regret is letting my mom talk me into wearing white shoes. The shoes themselves were fine (Danced in them all night with no problems), but it was a HUGE pain in the arse to find ones that would actually fit my Fred Flinstone feet comfortably in the first place (I'm convinced that I own the only pair of "white satin round toed pumps" in the entire world now) ... and obviously, I haven't worn them since. I could probably get them dyed or something, but that requires me to actually make an effort to do something, lol.

    In truth, I really wanted a pair of turquoise Mary Jane-style pumps, because I knew I'd get a ton of use out of them. But my mom heard that idea and oh, the pearl-clutching that ensued "You can't wear colored shoes! That's one of those 'weirdo' bride things that's just trendy right now, in another 5 years, that look will be 'dated' and you'll be sorry you did it when you look at the photos!".

    Well, the toe of ONE of my "timeless" bridal shoes is in exactly ONE photo that made it into the wedding album (Actually, it's also the only photo out of the 250 the photographer got where you can even see that I'm wearing shoes). At the time, it didn't seem like a hill worth dying on, so I spent weeks trying to find these stupid white shoes, just so I wouldn't have to hear it anymore. It's been 3 years, and I'm still ticked I let her "win" that battle.

    Of course, the second my mother saw that ONE photo, she seriously said "Now, see, aren't you glad you went with the white shoes? This picture looks SO much better that way" Yell

    *I felt sorry for my husband before I met him. Take a number.*
    image

  • ....

    My dad and I WILL be doing a father daughter Gangnam Style dance mashup with God Only Knows by the Beach Boys...

    Maybe this will be a regret?
    image
  • I regret not buying and wearing the flats I always swore I'd wear for my wedding - Kyra from David's bridal. I wore them to my prom and danced all night in them without a blister. I found "cuter" shoes from DSW that I wore for the ceremony and about 10 minutes of the reception - then spent the rest of the night barefoot. I could barely walk into the hotel at the end of the night! (Note - there were 6 years between my prom and my wedding, they just happen to still make those shoes)

    I also regret taking so many formal pics with our families during the cocktail hour. I had pretty much every combination of parents/grandparents/siblings with us, but in the end, we display the picture of our whole families combined, and our parents display the pictures of each side of our families. So basically, 3 pictures would have been enough.
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  • The only thing I regret is not taking like 10 minutes for just my husband and I after our ceremony - because after that, we went straight for photos then to the reception and then the night was over in a flash!
  • zantsterzantster member
    Eighth Anniversary 500 Comments Combo Breaker
    edited March 2013
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_chit-chat_your-post-wedding-regrets?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:14Discussion:1179ed68-562a-4657-b297-d03409d8fc3dPost:d896ae5f-5bc2-4b43-92d3-8084edf8f025">Re: Your Post-Wedding Regrets</a>:
    [QUOTE]I regret not buying and wearing the flats I always swore I'd wear for my wedding - Kyra from David's bridal. I wore them to my prom and danced all night in them without a blister. I found "cuter" shoes from DSW that I wore for the ceremony and about 10 minutes of the reception - then spent the rest of the night barefoot. I could barely walk into the hotel at the end of the night! (Note - there were 6 years between my prom and my wedding, they just happen to still make those shoes) I also regret taking so many formal pics with our families during the cocktail hour. I had pretty much every combination of parents/grandparents/siblings with us, but in the end, we display the picture of our whole families combined, and our parents display the pictures of each side of our families. So basically, 3 pictures would have been enough.
    Posted by krizzo17[/QUOTE]
    Good to know! Thanks!
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