Wedding Vows & Ceremony Discussions

how to honor mother and step-mother in ceremony?

I think that when the ceremony begins, first down the aisle will be my fiance's parents. Typically my mother would follow, and then the wedding party. Well, I have my step-mom and my mom. My mom will have a date with her, and naturally my step-mom won't because my dad will be walking me down. The first thought would be to have my step-mom walk after my fiance's parents, and then have my mom and her date follow. However, my step-mom is very sensitive about things due to the fact that she is unable to have children of her own. I like to try to make her feel as much of family as possible, but I suspect she might be upset about walking alone. So I then considered having my brother walk with my step-mom, and then have my mom and her date follow. Would this be very strange? I brought it up to my mom and she said it would be uncomfortable to have her son walking with his step-mom and not his real mom. But my mom also said she would do whatever made everyone else more at ease because when it comes down to it, my mom is the hardest to upset.

Have any of you ever had a situation like this, with divorced parents and multiple sets of parents and whatnot? What have you seen done before that might work? I do know that in the ceremony we are planning to have a bit where we honor the parents. Perhaps there is something to add to the program that could honor both my mom and my step-mom...

Any ideas at all would help! Thanks
BFP #1: 11.21.12; (EDD 7.30.13); missed M/C 12.21.12 @ 8w4d

Re: how to honor mother and step-mother in ceremony?

  • Is there another male relative that can walk your step-mom down the aisle, like a cousin or uncle? Then your brother could walk your mom down the aisle.  You say your mom will have a date...is it a serious relationship or is it fairly new?  I'd honestly rather see and have pictures of my brother walking my mom down the aisle than a "date".  I think either consider the moms both walk alone or be escorted by a family member. If your mom insists that she wants her date to walk her down the aisle, I think it's fair to let your brother walk your stepmom down the aisle.
    Crosswalk
  • Why not have one of the GMs or ushers (if there are any) walk her?
  • Unless your mom's date is a long term BF or FI, have him take a seat when the rest of the guests are being seated, then have your brother (and or other male relatives or ushers/groomsmen) escort MOG, then Stepmom, then your mom. 

    The MOB is always the last to be seated.  After walking you down the aisle, your Dad would take a seat with his wife.  If they all get along, they can all sit on the first row.  If not, seat your dad and stepmom a row or two back on the aisle seat.

    When a lady is being escorted, her husband or date usually walks directly behind.  If the MOG does not want to be escorted, let her DH escort themselves to their seat. 
  • I agree with the idea of having another male family member escort your mom in. 

    My FI's mom and his stepmom don't get along at all so we have already been planning out how to do seating.  Luckily, FI has 2 brothers so 1 is going to walk grandmother in, 1 in going to walk stepmom in, and then FI himself wants to walk his mom in. 

    Hope this helps some!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker BabyFruit Ticker Image and video hosting by TinyPic
  • At weddings I've been to the groom usually walks his mother in or if he has a brother in the wedding the brother may do it.

    I agree that mom's date should already be seated with the rest of the guests so it would be
    MOG escorted by groom or another son (if in the wedding party)
    Step mom escorted by your brother
    MOB escorted by your brother (there isn't any reason he shouldn't/can't escort them both.
  • Meladoriestar, this is a great question that I haven't even tackled yet! I too have a stepmom, however, my brothers are not biologically related to my mother, so I may be able to ask my single brother to walk with my stepmom IF I decide to let my mom walk with her date. She hasn't brought it up, so I may have to. 

    Currently, I think it will be easier for each of them to walk separately with  stepmom first and then your mother. HTH

    Thanks for the post, this give me something to consider before I'm blindsided by it by my mom!
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards