I got engaged in May of this year (2012) and announced and asked my friends in June to be a bridesmaid/MOH. When I asked, I also noted that I understood how expensive it could be to accept that role so if they didn't think it was possible, I understood and wouldn't be upset. They all accepted and seemed happy to do it. Fast forward to almost 5 months later and I now feel like a burden to these girls. First, it was impossible to get all 6 girls to look at dresses with me, so I decided I'd let them pick at their leisure as long as the material, length and color were the same. They never took the initiative to do this. Finally after 2 months of stressing, my sis-in-law (a bridesmaid) sends me one that I fell in love with. Keep in mind, NONE of the other girls took initiative, not even the MOH or Matron of Honour. I sent it to them all and even told them exactly where to go, how much it costs (only $160), and even the store's hours. As of today, only my sis-in-law has ordered and paid for hers. This store won't send any orders until ALL are received. Now my wedding is only 7 months away and the girls are expressing how broke they are. To make matters worse, it is my MOH and Matron of Honour that is the most broke. I feel like Bridezilla for putting a deadline on the purchase but it has to be - otherwise NO ONE will get their dress on time. I'm very happy for her but only 1 month after asking her to be my MOH, she found out she was pregnant. Now she won't have time to plan things, pay for things, and help with MOH duties. She swears she will but she hasn't proven herself so far and even worse, she straight up told me on the phone yesterday that she can't be there for me like I need her to be right now. Won't things like time and money only get worse for her with this pregnancy down the road?! Then with my Matron of Honour, I should have thought it through better, but she is a mother of two young ones. She was just crying over the fact they are so broke. As for the other girls, one asked ME to buy her dress, one is getting married one month after me, and the other is broke like the rest having just moved into a new house. So, all this time, just me and my Mom have been planning and working the duties of a MOH. Even with having TWO MOH, I still have no help.
I honestly feel like a burden and a Bridezilla having to put deadlines on them and ask them to pay for things like the dress, especially close to Christmas. However, the first request was to buy last month and only one did. I would rather know now then find out down the road that they can't afford it and it be too late to ask anyone else. What in the heck do I do! At this point, I am so depressed and upset that I don't even want anyone in the wedding. I think they would be hurt if I "fired" them - even if it was done politely but at the same time, I feel like it would be easier on everyone if no one was responsible for anything expcept showing up. Plus there is the whole dilemma with showers and parties that a typical MOH would throw - doubt money is there for that if this is already happening! Anyone else been through this and have some advice!? Surely I can't be the only one! I would greatly appreciate any advice - I'm tired of crying over something that should be the most joyous occasion of my life so far.