RSVP return address?

NinaBen · July 2010

My fiance and I have moved in together a year ago when we already knew that we would eventually get married (once we graduated). In the mean time we got engaged and are currently planning our dream wedding, that we are funding ourselves.

My question is related to the RSVPs - where do we have them sent to? Both our parents live in the same town as us, so we have 3 addresses to choose from. Also, if we decided to just have them sent to our place, whose name do we put on the address labels (we won't share the same last name before those invitations/RSVPs get sent out, of course).

lharri12 · July 2010

In your case, since you're paying for the wedding yourselves, why wouldn't you have them sent back to your address? You could put your name on it, your FI's, or both. It doesn't matter, as long as they'll get back to you.

Kristin789 · July 2010

The bride's parents host the wedding, unless they are deceased or unless they are not supportive of the marriage.

It does not matter if they are PAYING, or NOT PAYING.
PAYING is totally different from HOSTING.

So the bride's parents' names go on the top line of the invitation, as the people who are "requesting the honour" of the guests' presence. THEY are the people extending the invitation. So the RSVPs go to THEM. THEY are the HOSTS of the event.

Lisa8888 · July 2010

That is not true. The bride's parents are not hosting if they are not paying.

If the couple is paying then they are hosting and the RSVPs should be returned to them.

kathrynhabibti · July 2010

[QUOTE]<strong>The bride's parents host the wedding, unless they are deceased or unless they are not supportive of the marriage. </strong>It does not matter if they are PAYING, or NOT PAYING. PAYING is totally different from HOSTING. So the bride's parents' names go on the top line of the invitation, as the people who are "requesting the honour" of the guests' presence. THEY are the people extending the invitation. So the RSVPs go to THEM. THEY are the HOSTS of the event.
Posted by Kristin789[/QUOTE]

Not so. You're right that paying is different from hosting but the bride's parents do not necessarily have to be the hosts.

blondie82784 · July 2010

that's up to you were you want them sent. I would send them somewhere where you know they wouldn't get lost. We put my name on it because ill be keeping track and he could care less and if we sent them to my mothers house half of them would go missing because she doesn't check her mail till the end of the month lol

lisalou402 · July 2010

My mother is deceased. We are paying for the wedding ourselves. My father, in general, is sort of a jerk and not involved in anything, as his request. Except for getting a tuxedo.

There is no way that anyone thinks he is hosting my wedding, except for maybe his peers. Everyone else knows that me and my FI are hosting.

Clearly, i disagree! : )

I think it's very different and that in general, the bride's family hosts, but that doesn't mean it can't be any other way.

brookelynpaisley · July 2010

From what I read when I was planning, RSVPs are sent to the home of the bride, wherever that is. You can put your name, his or both. Mine said Ms. Brooke Lastname and our shared address.

melissamc2 · July 2010

We're also paying for everything and live together. Our rsvp envelopes are addressed to:

Melissa Bridetobe
Richard Melissasfiance
000 Address St.
Citywelivein, ON postalcode

Congratulations and good luck!

As an aside:

The bride's parents should never be assumed to be the hosts of anything, nor should they have rsvps thrust upon them for no reason. My Father is deceased, sure, but my Mother lives in another county and will be an honoured guest, not a hostess. Considering them the "hosts" of anything about our wedding, as the onse "expending an invitation," is laughable, at best.

quotequeen · July 2010

They should be sent to whomever is keeping track of the RSVPs because that makes life easier.

marisah83 · July 2010

The bride's parents are not necessarily the hosts.

Send the RSVPs to whoever will do the best in keeping track of them. My FI and I had them sent to our house.

APW2010 · July 2010

I would have the RSVPs sent back to you. They are enough of a headache already, without worrying about having someone else keep track of them or having to go pick them up at someone else's place. Plus, it makes checking the mail every day so fun - you don't want to miss out on that!! (seriously, by that point in planning, you will want any bit of fun you can get, lol)

We put both our names on the RSVP.

Xtine22 · July 2010

My FI and I live together in a different state then both our parents, who have both been very nice to pay for the wedding. i am having the RSVP sent to me since I will be the one keeping track. I also just put my name only on the RSVP envelope.

tenofcups4me · July 2010

I'd have them sent to the two of you. Personally I think it's weird when a couple lives together and the RSVPs are addressed to just the bride. It's a wedding for both people -- wouldn't they both want to get the responses? At least that's how we felt so we had both our names on it.

NinaBen · August 2010

Thank you everyone for the advice! I am going today to buy the label sheets so I can print my mailing/return labels.

RSVP return address?

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