Hello. I don't know how unusual this problem is but it is making me a little crazy. I got engaged about 1.5 weeks ago. I'm thrilled to death about that. I've known this is the right guy for me for a very long time.
He proposed the same weekend that I graduated grad school. I just got my Master's Degree in Community Counseling.
To complete grad school, I had to quit my job. By that point, we were living together. I had to quit my job to do my internship. For the past year, our deal was he worked, I did all the housework, most of the cooking, etc. I covered my share of the rent with a student loan. I finished school in August. I started job searching before that. I had a temp job just long enough to qualify for unemployment.
So my conundrum is trying to plan a wedding on one over-taxed salary. Of course, I understand that we can do a budget wedding. I know this and I believe in cutting corners where we can and we will.
I'm just feeling so much pressure now and I don't know how to let it go. I'm job searching like my life depends on it but, almost every morning since my engagement, I've woken up with money worries racing through my head. Is there anyone else who has been through this and can empathize and tell me how to turn off the worries? You'd think a trained counselor would know this but I'm struggling. I've never been out of work before. I've always been a person who defined myself by my job. Without work, I barely know who I am. I love being a fiancee but I hate feeling like that is all that I am.
Thanks for listening. The one bright upside to all of this is that I've been able to start some planning for the wedding. I'm not letting this free time go to waste at least.
i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart)
e.e.cummings