Catholic Weddings

:: agape ::

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Re: :: agape ::

  • Jasmine&RajahJasmine&Rajah member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment
    edited December 2011
    HandBanana, I'm not trying to single you out, so bear with me.

    If we were all playing soccer and I decided to pitch the ball into the net with my hands, everyone would stop the game and ask me what I was doing, and explain the rules to me if I didn't know them.  And if I responded, "I wanted to throw the ball," then the answer would be, "Well, you have the option to play by the rules, or go play basketball or baseball."  And it would be irrational of me to be upset by that.  (Not the best parallel, but it's all I can come up with at present.)

    Often, we have seen it posted that someone feels that others are being "holier than thou," as you said, in discussions such as this.  Can you - or anyone - give an example of what made you feel that way?  I ask because I truly. don't. get. it.  :-)  It is not at all judgemental to explain the rules of a soccer game.  How is it judgemental to point out what the Church teaches?  No one here EVER says anything like, "You are a horrible Catholic and I'm better than you."  Rather, statements like, "I understand you feel differently, but that's not what the Church professes, therefore it is not a Catholic belief," are made.  How is that offensive? 

    God bless you all.
  • HandBananaHandBanana member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_agape?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:5e11116e-df33-4961-92b7-c29257a55228Post:368e7350-959b-484e-bdf1-0300988a415d">Re: :: agape ::</a>:
    [QUOTE]HandBanana, I'm not trying to single you out, so bear with me. If we were all playing soccer and I decided to pitch the ball into the net with my hands, everyone would stop the game and ask me what I was doing, and explain the rules to me if I didn't know them.  And if I responded, "I wanted to throw the ball," then the answer would be, "Well, you have the option to play by the rules, or go play basketball or baseball."  And it would be irrational of me to be upset by that.  (Not the best parallel, but it's all I can come up with at present.) Often, we have seen it posted that someone feels that others are being "holier than thou," as you said, in discussions such as this.  Can you - or anyone - give an example of what made you feel that way?  I ask because I truly. don't. get. it.  :-)  It is not at all judgemental to explain the rules of a soccer game.  How is it judgemental to point out what the Church teaches?  No one here EVER says anything like, "You are a horrible Catholic and I'm better than you."  Rather, statements like, "I understand you feel differently, but that's not what the Church professes, therefore it is not a Catholic belief," are made.  How is that offensive?  God bless you all.
    Posted by Jasmine&Rajah[/QUOTE]

    It is the language arguments are presented in.  As I said, I originally enjoyed reading the posts as I only get the very liberal presentation but the tone of two Catholics just going back and forth is disappointing.

    I'm not referencing what they are actually arguing about and the content because I am the last person to claim to know the inticacies of Catholicism.

    Again, I'm not referencing the content of the argument but the tone.  Best example is to allude that you are taking it or turning the other cheek only to bait or taunt the other person.  I'm not going to specifically point out the poster but I just needed to express my disapointment.
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  • HandBananaHandBanana member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_agape?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:5e11116e-df33-4961-92b7-c29257a55228Post:50f5a3fa-baa4-4105-adb8-5f7bc04f2db9">Re: :: agape ::</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: :: agape :: : It is the language arguments are presented in.  As I said, I originally enjoyed reading the posts as I only get the very liberal presentation but the tone of two Catholics just going back and forth is disappointing. I'm not referencing what they are actually arguing about and the content because I am the last person to claim to know the inticacies of Catholicism. Again, I'm not referencing the content of the argument but the tone.  Best example is to allude that you are taking it or turning the other cheek only to bait or taunt the other person.  I'm not going to specifically point out the poster but I just needed to express my disapointment.
    Posted by HandBanana[/QUOTE]


    I should add that I do not argue about Catholic matters because I acknowledge that Chicago Catholics are taught a VERY liberal version that is often interpreted and watered down.  Not that we haven't found an amazing parish which is considered "backwards" by most because they attempt to stick to true Catholic teachings.

    To give you an idea of how bad it is my FH three brothers were unaware that as Catholics we believe that we believe that the actual body of Christ is received durring Communion.  All three attended Catholic grade schools and high schools.  I usually put all my Catholic questions through my FH who considered going to the seminary. 
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  • Calypso1977Calypso1977 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Combo Breaker
    edited December 2011
    i think its important to note that even if a priest has sinned, it doesnt make his sacraments any less valid.
  • lalaith50lalaith50 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Comment Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_agape?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:5e11116e-df33-4961-92b7-c29257a55228Post:fe0d8bc2-fc95-4b1b-b656-1cc77e144ce8">Re: :: agape ::</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: :: agape :: : And funny thing, before that there was a reasonable, charitable discussion of the Catholic Mass, judgment, Mass music, etc. 
    Posted by KatieAnne18[/QUOTE]

    <div>(KatieAnne-- it just looked funny the way you quoted my simple question of "teenlife? I thought we were talking about Life Teen." and then continued with the above statement. I hope you were not saying that my question was the first non-reasonable, non-charitable thing in this conversation? I mainly asked for clarification with that question because I found it strange that someone who was so adamently opposed to Life Teen and seemed to know so much about it could suddenly forget the name of it! I will assume that you just accidently quoted it or didn't intend your statement to be referring to it. :-) )</div>
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  • agapecarrieagapecarrie member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_agape?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:615Discussion:5e11116e-df33-4961-92b7-c29257a55228Post:d42b1f2b-8206-4238-b4d9-af090d418d97">Re: :: agape ::</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: :: agape :: : (KatieAnne-- it just looked funny the way you quoted my simple question of "teenlife? I thought we were talking about Life Teen." and then continued with the above statement. I hope you were not saying that my question was the first non-reasonable, non-charitable thing in this conversation? I mainly asked for clarification with that question because I found it strange that someone who was so adamently opposed to Life Teen and seemed to know so much about it could suddenly forget the name of it! I will assume that you just accidently quoted it or didn't intend your statement to be referring to it. :-) )
    Posted by lalaith50[/QUOTE]


    I'm still really confused by the "don't let them enter there" statement either. I don't know if I was the one referred to as "baiting" but I honestly wasn't trying to. I would really like that question answered because it doesn't make sense to me.
  • edited December 2011

    This is a pet peeve of mine, so I'm just going to say it.  Life Teen is two words.  It's not "lifeteen," "LifeTeen," and it's certainly not "Teenlife" (I'm not trying to pick on you, OOT, I just used to get that a lot when I was ym).  LIFE TEEN.  Look it up on their website if you don't believe me.  Whew!  Thanks for allowing me that!

    Okay, second, OOT is not so different from many others, including myself.  Before I began teaching Life Teen, I had a horrible impression of it.  I'd read all sorts of awful things about it, saw blogs ranting about it, saw fb groups devoted to poking fun at it.  The truth is that Life Teen is actually very orthodox.  I appreciated that they emphasized traditional devotions like the rosary, observances of traditional feasts, stations of the cross, and adoration.  Adoration is really a big deal in Life Teen.  The problem is that its execution is sometimes poor.  If you've seen a poorly executed Life Teen, it's not because the material or prgramming is bad, it's because the leaders may not know what they're doing and probably aren't using the materials correctly. 

    OOT, not to be harsh, but it sounds to me like you haven't even visited the Life Teen website, talked to a Life Teen youth minister, youth group member, or really anyone who might support it and see the benefit of it.  And no. Agape does not count.  If you want a fair, balanced view of Life Teen you need to seek out someone in REAL LIFE that can tell you something about it.  Maybe even visit a Life Night yourself or ask to look over the materials.  Have you ever considered that <gasp /> SH might be wrong about it??

    Agape, I'm so glad you had a great experience with it and learned a solid grounding in your faith because of it.  I bet you had fantastic, dynamic and orthodox leaders!  Also, I'm always impressed with the simplicity of your comments.  They're really not often more than what the Church teaches stated very plainly.  Sometimes I feel like you miss my point, but I appreciate your presence on this board.

    And I want to add that I didn't call anyone on this board a heretic.  Everyone knows what a cafeteria Catholic is - someone who chooses which doctrines to follow and ignores the rest.  I was pointing out that a cafeteria Catholic is really a heretic.  I don't know any of you personally and I have no idea if you believe in the Real Presence but think confession is silly.  Or believe in the primacy of the seat of Peter, but think women should be ordained.  If you do those things, you might be a heretic... ;)  But I really can't tell you that. 

  • Hope61Hope61 member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    Oh, sorry for the misunderstanding! No, no problem with your question at all. I was trying to continue from it, like "Before we were talking about Lifeteen? And before that we were talking about Mass?" I was using the conversation of LifeTteen and then Teenlife to try to point out that there was a great discussion before Life Teen even was brought into question. I keep trying (very unsuccessfully) to bring this conversation back to when it was reasonable and charitable...  Sorry about that, hope this clears it up :)

    Edited to make Life Teen two words ;)
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  • agapecarrieagapecarrie member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    I wanted to clarify, it was as an adult youth minister that I went to a lifeteen training conference, and that is what made me 100% Catholic.

    Gwendolyn, in your last post, you addressed me in the 2nd to last paragraph, but then the following paragraph used the word "you" which I'm assuming you meant a general "you" and not me particularly? Cause I certainly believe in Peter/pope and magisterium.
  • edited December 2011
    yep, general you, sorry 'bout that!
  • agapecarrieagapecarrie member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    edited December 2011
    No problem.

    By the way, several years ago on april fools, Matt Smith, the LT web master put out on the web site that the team decided to change the name to teen life. Changed the logo and everything. All sorts of upset from teens on the message board. He only left it for a few hours. it was quite humorous
  • doctabroccolidoctabroccoli member
    First Comment
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_agape?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:615Discussion:5e11116e-df33-4961-92b7-c29257a55228Post:e46744db-c518-4b63-ba8d-232f9e297d9e">Re: :: agape ::</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: :: agape :: :  I wasn't talking about CSH, I was speaking of a very liberal anti-catholic "catholic" school where I am. They call themselves catholic, but do not teach the faith, nor encourage any parish participation, or teach any true catholic doctrine. And they don't encourage their students to go to lifeteen. Posted by agapecarrie[/QUOTE]

    I'm genuinely curious which school you are talking about.

    And I did have an awful experience with Life Teen at a St. Louis parish.  The people who ran it were the rudest most non-inclusive people I have ever met.  If you weren't BFFs with them, you weren't in their super secret Life Teen club.  I'm not positive that this parish even has it any more.....
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  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_agape?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:615Discussion:5e11116e-df33-4961-92b7-c29257a55228Post:91cce30b-7721-49a2-94a1-1f315585f103">Re: :: agape ::</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: :: agape :: : I simply do not understand this at all. Yes, the CSH schools are Jesuit oriented but they are the best Catholic education internationally and that is, IMO, a pretty good basis for a good Catholic life. "extreemly liberal anti catholic "you're really too much to even try to wrap my brain around <strong>99% of the Catholics I know would love to have their daughters educated there.
    </strong>Posted by ootmother2[/QUOTE]

    I'm going to try to say this as charitably as possible... if you are an example of how CSH grads or CSH families conduct themselves, then I wouldn't want my daughters attending there, nor would I want them even associating with CSH students or alums.  You are constant negativity, and it's always directed at one other member.  Reading your posts is like watching "Mean Girls."   It is not a great witness for the school you try to brag about.

    It's Lent.  Can we all try to be respectful to one another? 
  • ootmother2ootmother2 member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    To settle this once an for all.

    YES , I did research the site and did so ages ago before I even came on this board


    Mean Girls?  DED

    I really don't think I care to post here unless someone pages me.  One sided mentalities don't suit me at all.
  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/cultural-wedding-boards_catholic-weddings_agape?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Cultural Wedding BoardsForum:615Discussion:5e11116e-df33-4961-92b7-c29257a55228Post:380909be-90b0-42d1-8029-ff6b21da147d">Re: :: agape ::</a>:
    [QUOTE] Mean Girls?  DED
    Posted by ootmother2[/QUOTE]

    I was trying to be delicate about it.  Would you prefer I used the word beginning with a B that I think characterizes the majority of your posts?  The fact remains -- your posts are always negativity, are almost always personal attacks on one other member, and are NOT a good witness for the school you claim to brag about. 

    So no, I wouldn't want my future daughters going to that school, based on the example you set on these boards.
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