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May 2011 Weddings

Personal Attendant?

I'm not sure how many of you girls will have one, but it's kind of a "custom" in our family to have one.   The only thing is, I don't want to call her a "Personal Attendant".  It sounds too much like a job title, not an honor.  Any ideas what else I could call her?

Re: Personal Attendant?

  • I'm too afraid to ask anyone...lol
    "The best thing about loving and being hurt is that you get to know what true love really is. For as gold is tested in fire, and so will love be perfected in pain."
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  • how old? and can you break the tradition? what do they do?
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  • I'm confused as well  - what does being a 'personal attendant' involve?
    Will it be someone close to you? (ie - a relative, best friend, etc) Or someone else?

    What about Honor Attendant? I'm not sure if that would really work or not, since I don't really know what a personal attendant is. hahaha. 

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  • I did it last year for my MOH. It was a really neat experience.  Every detail that was forgotten (no one was serving the head table) I took control of.  She also listed me as the wedding contact for one of her vendors in case something goes wrong.

    I am also having me personal attendant do a reading at our ceremony, and I am going to ask her husband to do the ceremony music.
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  • In Response to Re: Personal Attendant?:
    [QUOTE]I did it last year for my MOH. It was a really neat experience.  Every detail that was forgotten (no one was serving the head table) I took control of.  She also listed me as the wedding contact for one of her vendors in case something goes wrong. I am also having me personal attendant do a reading at our ceremony, and I am going to ask her husband to do the ceremony music.
    Posted by slweaver0626[/QUOTE]

    I'm glad you know what I'm talking about!  I don't like the title of "Personal Attendant" because it makes it sound like the girl is the bride's slave.  I like "Honor Attendant".  My aunt, who has MS or my cousin, who had to back out of the wedding due to financial problems, are my choices.  Would it be weird to have 2 of them??
  • I've heard it to be known as "lady in waiting".  Honor Attendant works well too!

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  • Oook, now I get what you're talking about! I thought about asking my one good friend to help with stuff like that, I just never knew it actually had a name! hahaha. 

    I don't think it would be weird for you to have 2. You could have 1 helping with the getting ready stuff, and the other helping with getting everyone together for pictures, or just use them both for everything!  
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  • In Response to Re: Personal Attendant?:
    [QUOTE]I did it last year for my MOH. It was a really neat experience.  Every detail that was forgotten (no one was serving the head table) I took control of.  She also listed me as the wedding contact for one of her vendors in case something goes wrong. I am also having me personal attendant do a reading at our ceremony, and I am going to ask her husband to do the ceremony music.
    Posted by slweaver0626[/QUOTE]

    These all sound like things a day of coordinator should be doing. Someone that you pay to do these things. I understand goetzr that's it's customary in your family, but why do you have BMs if they don't help you get dressed, help with pictures, etc? Can you be the first in your family to not have one? 

    Everything a personal attendant does (that I've read on here and other posts) is something that could be handle by a BM or should be handled by a coordinator that you're paying. I don't get them, never will. I don't think there's another name that could be given to her. Honor attendants are you BM and GM.
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  • I will be having 2 "Honor Attendants" my FSIL will be almost 8 months pregnant for our wedding, so she will not be a BM, but still wanted her to be a part of the wedding. Also, because she will be almost 8 mo pregnant, she will not be up to doing everything so I will either be choosing my cousin or my brother's gf (who just may be FI by then if he gets his butt in gear.)

    mkrupar - I would rather have someone I know doing these tasks than paying someone money I could use elsewhere to take care of it. I also see it as a way to involve people who would not like to be standing at the alter during the ceremony but still want to share in our day.
  • In Response to Re: Personal Attendant?:
    [QUOTE]I will be having 2 "Honor Attendants" my FSIL will be almost 8 months pregnant for our wedding, so she will not be a BM, but still wanted her to be a part of the wedding. Also, because she will be almost 8 mo pregnant, she will not be up to doing everything so I will either be choosing my cousin or my brother's gf (who just may be FI by then if he gets his butt in gear.) mkrupar - I would rather have someone I know doing these tasks than paying someone money I could use elsewhere to take care of it. I also see it as a way to involve people who would not like to be standing at the alter during the ceremony but still want to share in our day.
    Posted by mbussey1234[/QUOTE]

    Helping you get dressed and stuff should be done by someone you know, but that's why you have BMs. Organizing everyone, making sure everything runs on time, handling issues with vendors, those are all tasks for a coordinator, a professional, who does it for a living.

    I would rather have someone that is involved in 30 weddings a year handle the task of organizing vendors, WP, and caterers, then someone I know who knows nothing about handling and talking with these people. Call me crazy, but I don't think Aunt Mildred has a lot of experience organizing a DJ/caterer/photographer, while making sure you and your WP are ready and on time.

    This is coming from someone who has worked in planning events as a manager and working events as a captain and server. The vendors would much rather have a converstaion with a professional then the crazy MOB who thinks she knows anything and everything about planning a wedding (most times her first child's wedding).

    Remember, being a guest is an honor. I'm not saying don't have FSIL get ready with you in the suite or help you get ready. I'm saying don't just give her a crappy title so she feels better about not standing up with you.

    Again, an "Honor Attendant" means you BMs or GMs. Giving everyone and anyone else the title kind of lessens the importance for them.
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