What would you think of these favors?

manateehugger · December 2012

Yeah, my wedding isn't for another 18 months, but my Type A personality wont let me stop planning! Anyway, I know edible favors are the yummy popular thing, but what would you think of personalized playing cards kind of like these:

http://www.beau-coup.com/customized-playing-cards.htm

Both of our families are big card-players (games like Hearts and Spades...not gambling haha) which really made me feel at home with the FIL's, and I think it could be a neat, fun nod to that. But what do you ladies think? Are they tacky? Would you even take them home, or at least bust them out at the wedding if you got bored?

melb2013 · December 2012

If I'm being honest, I think favors are a waste of money. Because I don't feel like finding my Miss Manners book, I'll paraphrase one of my favorite quotes from her. Something along the lines of: Favors are for children's birthday parties when the guests need consolation for not being the center of attention- they are not appropriate or necessary for weddings.

manateehugger · December 2012

I completely get what you're saying, and I know the quote actually

- "Etiquette has never thought of weddings as comparable to children's birthday parties, where the guests might need consolation for not being the center of attention." - but for me, it is kind of a perspective/priority issue.

For example, I refuse to pay for a professional photographer because I think it's crazy to drop thousands of dollars on something only my mom and I will care about one year later. I know we all have fun clicking through everyone else's wedding photos, but do we actually care about them as outsiders? But that's just me; I know quality pictures are important to other brides, so I tell them, "Go for it!"

For me, I guess it's important to spend my money on my guests and ensuring a fun wedding - which is why I wanted to know if these favors would be thought of as complete junk and if everyone would rather walk home with a bag of candy.

melb2013 · December 2012

Ok, well I certainly don't think they're tacky. They're also functional and fun

manateehugger · December 2012

Thanks

Also...I lurk and am nosy, sorry, but I know you're the one having issues with the Indian family. I'm bracing for the same stuff, just on the opposite side: my family is from India,not his. Feel free to ask if you need some Indian family wedding insight - I've got loads (sister married son of Southern Baptist preacher - just imagine the culture clash there).

Cortney1982 · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_what-would-you-think-of-these-favors?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:ea4766ee-eaca-4dc4-b5c1-2fe9bc756fdePost:8f312769-f75f-4339-a1e6-7dd8c6e52c0a">Re: What would you think of these favors?</a>:
[QUOTE]I I refuse to pay for a professional photographer because I think it's crazy to drop thousands of dollars on something only my mom and I will care about one year later. I know we all have fun clicking through everyone else's wedding photos, but do we actually care about them as outsiders? But that's just me; I know quality pictures are important to other brides, so I tell them, "Go for it!" For me, I guess it's important to spend my money on my guests and ensuring a fun wedding - which is why I wanted to know if these favors would be thought of as complete junk and if everyone would rather walk home with a bag of candy.
Posted by PDKH[/QUOTE]

Perhaps you may want to give the professional photographer a second thought. I felt the exact same way and didn't want to spend the money. We paid this chick $250, she had a professional camera but didn't know how to use it. Our pictures were crap and I'm still sad about them. The day goes by so fast and all you have left are pictures to remember and see the stuff you missed.

As for the favors, I would leave those behind. I don't like things with personalization on them, espcially with somebody elses name and wedding date.

Avion22 · December 2012

Personally, I wouldn't care for a pack of playing cards. I'm not sure what you mean by "personalized" -- does it say something like, "Anna and Jim, December 13, 2012", or will each deck of cards have the name of an individual guest on it?

If you gave me a deck of cards with my name on it, I'd feel obligated to take it, then it would probably sit in my junk drawer for a year before I threw it away. If it had your names and wedding date on it, I probably woudln't take it at all...I'd just leave it on the table.

jessicabessica · December 2012

Could you personalize them with a photo of a meaningful place to you, rather than your names or wedding date? That just seems more versatile. The monogram isn't terrible, thouhg. Cards are more useful to me than a random heart picture frame or a wine glass with someone else's name on it.

I think as long as it's in your budget and you won't be upset if you have extras when some guests leave them behind, it's fine to do this. Definitely not tacky.

ashleyy00 · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_what-would-you-think-of-these-favors?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:ea4766ee-eaca-4dc4-b5c1-2fe9bc756fdePost:6d1c95f7-c0bd-4cd6-a955-a766bda56d53">Re: What would you think of these favors?</a>:
[QUOTE]Personally, I wouldn't care for a pack of playing cards. I'm not sure what you mean by "personalized" -- does it say something like, "Anna and Jim, December 13, 2012", or will each deck of cards have the name of an individual guest on it?<strong> If you gave me a deck of cards with my name on it, I'd feel obligated to take it, then it would probably sit in my junk drawer for a year before I threw it away. If it had your names and wedding date on it, I probably woudln't take it at all...I'd just leave it on the table. </strong>
Posted by Avion22[/QUOTE]

Agree!

melb2013 · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_what-would-you-think-of-these-favors?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:ea4766ee-eaca-4dc4-b5c1-2fe9bc756fdePost:c467d376-dbe6-4c6c-8817-55cf97bafa7b">Re: What would you think of these favors?</a>:
[QUOTE]Thanks Also...I lurk and am nosy, sorry, but I know you're the one having issues with the Indian family. I'm bracing for the same stuff, just on the opposite side: my family is from India,not his. Feel free to ask if you need some Indian family wedding insight - I've got loads (sister married son of Southern Baptist preacher - just imagine the culture clash there).
Posted by PDKH[/QUOTE]

<div>Oh jeez I'm famous (infamous?)! LOL! I'm pretty lucky my FIL's have never even heard of knot or any other website or magazine for that matter, so I can post here without them seeing it. Although at this point, it couldn't get worse if they did see!</div><div>
</div><div>What types of issues do you think you'll encouter with your FI's family? Are you having an Indian wedding? It seems the favors are taking his family into account, so it sounds like you are off to a good start on your side.</div>

melb2013 · December 2012

Oh and OP, my FIL's are super cray cray- I once said something about Miss Manners and they looked at me like I had ten heads. Since then, every time I say something about etiquette, they tell me that Indian people have different rules of etiquette and I'm marrying an Indian family so I need to deal with it. I'm so glad you have a Miss Manners book- that just makes me feel vindicated

AddieCake · December 2012

I would leave the cards behind if they had your names, initials, or wedding date on them, but otherwise I would take them. I wouldn't really care about them, but it's always good to have a deck of cards on hand.

Maggie0829 · December 2012

Guests do not care about favors. They do not miss them if they are not there. You will not hear one single guest say "Man, I didn't get my random tchotchke that I will have no idea what to do with except throw in a drawer."

I would skip the favors and put the money towards a professional photographer, even if you only get one to photograph your ceremony and take a few pictures afterwards. I think you will sincerely regret not having some nice professional pictures down the road. Yes the picture are primarily for you and your families but wouldn't it be nice to look back in 50 years and show them to your grandchildren when they ask what you were like when you were young?

alithebride · December 2012

honestly-i'd probably take them home so they wouldn't be left on the table and then throw them out. i have so many already, am not a big card player and anything with someone else's names.wedding date are useless imo.
while it's great that you and your fi and some of your family are big card players your focus needs to be on something that everyone will like (or the vast majority) since the favor is for them, not you.
that's why edible is best.
you could do a spin on cards though-cookies that are decorated like cards, or chocolates etc..

QueerFemme · December 2012

<div align="left">In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_what-would-you-think-of-these-favors?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:ea4766ee-eaca-4dc4-b5c1-2fe9bc756fdePost:8fd34f8f-d0ab-4c8f-b587-70b6640cef62">What would you think of these favors?</a>:
[QUOTE]Yeah, my wedding isn't for another 18 months, but my Type A personality wont let me stop planning! Anyway, I know edible favors are the yummy popular thing, but what would you think of personalized playing cards kind of like these: <a rel="nofollow" href="http://www.beau-coup.com/customized-playing-cards.htm">http://www.beau-coup.com/customized-playing-cards.htm</a> Both of our families are big card-players (games like Hearts and Spades...not gambling haha) which really made me feel at home with the FIL's, and I think it could be a neat, fun nod to that. But what do you ladies think? Are they tacky? Would you even take them home, or at least bust them out at the wedding if you got bored?
Posted by PDKH[/QUOTE]

Yep, I'm with everyone else. I would leave these there, or toss them when I got home. People don't really generally want/enjoy things with personalization from someone else's wedding. </div>

ksblumb · December 2012

I personally love this idea -- our families are big card players too (both sides, even extended families), so I know my guests would like them. We would certainly use them if we were your guests and they had your monogram on them. So, my vote is yes!

WonderfulSavior · December 2012

I vote yes too! I like! : ) Cute touch- since you know everyone there would prob LOVE them. I personally am having a candy bar (sweet n salty) with small baggies as our "favors". This way, you dont want the candy or salty goodness? Then skip it. But we would have it out for those that do. I'm sure people will be all over this idea, considering, most of the weddings that have had choc as favors, I saw people eating BEFORE they left. LOL.

s-aries8990 · December 2012

Can you do a candy/cookie bar with these cards that are "specialized" (not personalized with photo of you, monogram or name/date)? Do like a casino thing and label the different types of candy at different levels.... have like junior mints be the $1, jelly beans the $5, swedish the $10, etc and have enough playing cards on the side per couple?

You'll give the cards your family enjoys, the candy everyone else will like, and if your left with extra cards, because they're not personalized you can sell them at a swap meet/ flea market/ yard sale/ TK/craigslist.

Coghoot12 · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_what-would-you-think-of-these-favors?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:5Discussion:ea4766ee-eaca-4dc4-b5c1-2fe9bc756fdePost:8f312769-f75f-4339-a1e6-7dd8c6e52c0a">Re: What would you think of these favors?</a>:
[QUOTE]I completely get what you're saying, and I know the quote actually - "Etiquette has never thought of weddings as comparable to children's birthday parties, where the guests might need consolation for not being the center of attention." - but for me, it is kind of a perspective/priority issue. <strong>For example, I refuse to pay for a professional photographer because I think it's crazy to drop thousands of dollars on something only my mom and I will care about one year later. I know we all have fun clicking through everyone else's wedding photos, but do we actually care about them as outsiders? But that's just me; I know quality pictures are important to other brides, so I tell them, "Go for it!"</strong> For me, I guess it's important to spend my money on my guests and ensuring a fun wedding - which is why I wanted to know if these favors would be thought of as complete junk and if everyone would rather walk home with a bag of candy.
Posted by PDKH[/QUOTE]

I know this isn't your question but I'm going to throw in another vote for "reconsider the professional photographer". One of my biggest regrets is not investing more in a photographer. She was newer to the business so we got a great deal but the pictures weren't great, the lighting is off on almost all of them and there were a lot of moments that she missed. I know my wedding was fantastic and everything I wanted it to be but I really don't have the pictures to reflect that. I think you may regret not being able to go back and re-live that day. It all goes by so fast!

Peavy · December 2012

What about these cute chocolate playing cards? http://www.candywarehouse.com/occasions/game-night-and-card-game-candy/products/chocolate-poker-playing-cards-16-piece-pack/

A couple of these in a cello bag would make a great favor that's appealing to everyone and still gives you playing cards. Personally, I wouldn't take a deck of cards that wasn't Bicycle or Bee.

Belle0720 · December 2012

I vote on skipping the favors and putting that money towards food or drinks.

I also agree that you'll regret not hiring a photographer. You don't have to spend thousands, look for an amateur photographer or someone just to cover the ceremony and some group pics instead of all day.

AdeleDazeem · December 2012

I really like the playing card idea, but I wouldn't put your monogram, initials or wedding date on it. I'd also avoid engagement pictures of two of you. The minute that stuff goes on there, its value (meaning, how much guests like it) diminish considerably. If you want something that isn't going to eaten or tossed immediately, you have to think about what makes it most useful and more generic is more useful to 200-some odd people.

Can you pick a photo of somewhere that's meaningful to you instead? Can you do a design in your wedding colors for the backs? Do you have any pets? A cute picture of the dog would be awesome!

HobokensFury · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_what-would-you-think-of-these-favors?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:ea4766ee-eaca-4dc4-b5c1-2fe9bc756fdePost:8f312769-f75f-4339-a1e6-7dd8c6e52c0a">Re: What would you think of these favors?</a>:
[QUOTE]I completely get what you're saying, and I know the quote actually - "Etiquette has never thought of weddings as comparable to children's birthday parties, where the guests might need consolation for not being the center of attention." - but for me, it is kind of a perspective/priority issue. For example, I refuse to pay for a professional photographer because I think it's crazy to drop thousands of dollars on something only my mom and I will care about one year later. I know we all have fun clicking through everyone else's wedding photos, but do we actually care about them as outsiders? But that's just me; I know quality pictures are important to other brides, so I tell them, "Go for it!" For me, I guess it's important to spend my money on my guests and ensuring a fun wedding - which is why I wanted to know if these favors would be thought of as complete junk and if everyone would rather walk home with a bag of candy.
Posted by PDKH[/QUOTE]

As PP has stated reconsider the professional photographer. Pictures will be the only solid memory you have of your wedding and trust me you will care about them forever, not just a year.

Skip the cards. No one wants/ will use playing cards with someone else's name on them.

kmmssg · December 2012

Again, acknowledging you didn't ask or post about this, I would also encourage you to reconsider the photographer. We lost MIL 4 yrs after we were married and had some awesome pics of her from our wedding that we treasure.

As far as the cards? For those who are saying "hey my family plays cards a lot!", my question would be don't they already have all the playing cards they need? If the cards were personalized or monogrammed in anyway, I would leave them behind. If they were more generic I might grab them for DS but I have had the same 3 decks of cards for years and they aren't going anywhere.

Skip the favors and reconsider the photographer.

MairePoppy · December 2012

The cards are one of the few non-edible favors that I like. We are card players, too. We have many decks of cards, but I would take your cards home and use them.

bunni727 · December 2012

I think the playing cards are a good idea since you know your guests will enjoy them.

If you don't want a professional photographer, don't get one. Just make sure that someone is taking pictures, and that they have a list of pictures you want. I don't regret skipping the professional photographer at all, I regret not making a list of important shots and people for my photojournalism-inclined friend.

[Deleted User] · December 2012

I would like and use the cards.

Tami87 · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_what-would-you-think-of-these-favors?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:ea4766ee-eaca-4dc4-b5c1-2fe9bc756fdePost:ca0757c4-0805-4b21-8da7-c604a3930d2d">Re: What would you think of these favors?</a>:
[QUOTE]For those who are saying "hey my family plays cards a lot!", my question would be don't they already have all the playing cards they need? If the cards were personalized or monogrammed in anyway, I would leave them behind. If they were more generic I might grab them for DS but I have had the same 3 decks of cards for years and they aren't going anywhere. Skip the favors and reconsider the photographer.
Posted by kmmssg[/QUOTE]

My family plays cards a lot and we always seem to be running out and buying more of them. If you play with them a lot they can get sticky or can get bent or worn. We also tend to do huge tournaments whenever the extended family gets together so we need multiple decks.

I agree that edible favors seem to go over best and that favors are not necessary. However, if it was me attending as a guest I would take the cards home, although I would prefer a pretty picture or design in the wedding colors rather than a monogram or picture of the couple on the back.

xxstardust · December 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_reception-ideas_what-would-you-think-of-these-favors?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:5Discussion:ea4766ee-eaca-4dc4-b5c1-2fe9bc756fdePost:ca0757c4-0805-4b21-8da7-c604a3930d2d">Re: What would you think of these favors?</a>:
[QUOTE]Again, acknowledging you didn't ask or post about this, I would also encourage you to reconsider the photographer. We lost MIL 4 yrs after we were married and had some awesome pics of her from our wedding that we treasure. As far as the cards? For those who are saying "hey my family plays cards a lot!", my question would be don't they already have all the playing cards they need? If the cards were personalized or monogrammed in anyway, I would leave them behind. If they were more generic I might grab them for DS but I have had the same 3 decks of cards for years and they aren't going anywhere. Skip the favors and reconsider the photographer.
Posted by kmmssg[/QUOTE]

This was my first thought - we play cards all the time in my family, which means we already have way too many decks of cards. Like someone else upthread said, I'd take it so as not to hurt feelings then end up throwing them away.

ljsquintz · December 2012

I would take home and keep the deck of cards. But I also really love one of PP's ideas about a chocolate deck of cards or something along those lines.

bprezzano · December 2012

Love the idea! My family is big on card games too kings in the corner, contract rummy, spit... If I went to ur wedding and got cards I'd be pretty stoked

What would you think of these favors?

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