Offended by my MOH

i2012do · May 2012

DD because I am being harassed.

Maggie0829 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_offended-my-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:4c726cac-be15-4942-a3bb-658edabe9554Post:8e626fd9-24ea-4648-824f-f1e38d4baaf6">Offended my MOH</a>:
[QUOTE]I don't really know what response I need from this. I just needed someplace to vent about this bceause I think it will sound foolish to anyone else. My best friend and MOH has kind of been thinking she is doing a REALLY good job, but in reality has been kind of planning things "her" way. Maybe this doesn't make sense. But I heard from my mom that my MOH took over planning the shower and what she planned for it is exactly what she told me SHE'D like in a shower. Not what I like. this didn't really bother me much, because I was just appreciative of my shower. She keeps saying things that are offensive to me about the wedding. And telling me "how" she would do tings. Even though a few times I have pointed out that it is MY wedding and her time will come. Now she is assuming that her boyfriend is invited to the wedding. She told me she told him to start planning my fiances bachelorette party becuase he has "no one else" (my fiance moved here from across the states and so he doenst have a lot of friends here, they are all back in his hometown)... but my brother and cousin and my fiances friend who is IN the wedding is planning th ebachelor party. and actually, my fiance DOES have "someone". I didn't even want to invite her boyfriend. He's super rude and immature, but I've onl met him twice so I am trying to give him a chance. And my mom said i should invite him since her parents are attending the wedding etc. <strong>I'm really annoyed that 1. she assumed he was invited</strong> and 2. that she said that to him about the bachelor party. I'm pretty sure my fiance doesn't want a guy he met twice, who he doesn't like planning his bachelor party. and i said that my dad is attending and my uncle and she said "THAT is STRANGE" We are lmost 30 years old, and my fiance has grown close to my dad since he doesn't have a lot of friends here. He doesnt want to go to a strip club and a dance club, he wants to go fishing and my uncle has offered for them to take out his boat for the day. I feel like I'm pmsing and being overly emotional and maybe she meant well...about her bf planning the bachelor party etc. but it just rubbed me the wrong way.
Posted by i2012do[/QUOTE]

If you don't want to hear her opinions then I suggest you stop talking to her about your wedding.

I think it was rude of you to even consider not inviting her boyfriend. It does not matter what you think of him or that you have only met him twice, he is her boyfriend and as a social unit should be invited together, no matter what.

As far as her telling her boyfriend to plan the bach party just ignore it, I am sure he will do the same.

travistanya · May 2012

You could kindly decline the bachelor party that she wanted her BF to plan and let her know of the other plans. However, her BF should be invited to the wedding. All SO's need to be invited together, even if you don't like one of them.

i2012do · May 2012

She's my MOH I can't stop talking to her about the wedding. Obviosusly we have other convos as well but she is throwing my shower---so she talks about it a lot
I never ONCE mentioned a bachelor party to her. I don't know where this came from.
It was so awkward and strange. Esp since my fiance doesn't like her bf and has met him twice. Why would he want a stranger to plan his bachelor party
and how rude to say he has "no one else" lik ehe is some kind of loser with not a single friend or family member.

If i told fiance she said that he'd not only be totally hurt he'd also be offended and mad at her

Maggie0829 · May 2012

Um, just because she is your MOH does not mean you have to share every single wedding detail with her.

Ok, she is throwing your shower, she doesn't need wedding details to do that and you shouldn't be told all about your shower anyways.

Like I said before, in regards to her talking about your FI bach party just ignore it.

i2012do · May 2012

I'm not sharing any details with her...I never wrote that.

Maggie0829 · May 2012

You just contradicted yourself. In the previous post above mine you said that "She's my MOH I can't stop talking to her about the wedding" but now you are saying that you are not sharing any details with her. Also, if you aren't sharing any info with her then how can she say anything "offensive" to you about your wedding?

And I like how you never even commented on all the posts about how you should invite her BF because it would be rude not to. Ignoring that for a reason?

i2012do · May 2012

I didn't mean it like "I can't stop talking about" Like I talk non stopI meant
I am unable to stop talking about the wedding because she is continually asking me questions about it. And asking me questions about the shower.

and I am not always one to initiate a conversaton. Sometimes she initaties something.
For instance she mentioned that she was at her boyfriends and told me she told him to "get on" planning my fiances bachelor party because he has NO ONE.
I was talking about her going to see him, she initiated that conversation.

I don't have to invite anyone I don't want to. Especially someone that called me a preverse name and insulted my fiance and called my mom a "skinny witch"

sparent2010 · May 2012

[QUOTE] I don't have to invite anyone I don't want to. Especially someone that called me a preverse name and insulted my fiance and called my mom a "skinny witch" [/QUOTE]

Cool and you can look like a big jerk when you don't invite him to the wedding. You are acting like a 12 year old.

For the other items: You can change the subject or tell her you don't really want to talk wedding. Tell her that her BF is not in charge of planning your FI's B-party.

Maggie0829 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_offended-my-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:4c726cac-be15-4942-a3bb-658edabe9554Post:8e626fd9-24ea-4648-824f-f1e38d4baaf6">Offended by my MOH</a>:
[QUOTE]DD because I am being harassed.
Posted by i2012do[/QUOTE]

First, how the hell did I harass you? I was asking you questions and I can only comment on what was being posted. Just because she asks you questions about your wedding doesn't mean that you have to give her the information. Have you ever thought about saying "Oh, we haven't decided on that yet." or "Not quiet sure what we are doing". And if she keeps pushing nicely tell her that you would rather not talk about it right now.

And you were ignoring the fact that it is rude to not invite her BF. Yeah, he may be a big jerk but you would look like an even bigger one for not inviting him.

Second, you were quoted so DD your post was pointless.

jemmini6 · May 2012

Wow OP, you're a peach (and DD didn't do any good, considering you were quoted) Not a single person here harrassed you, they just didn't validate your bad behavior.

GoodLuckBear14 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_offended-my-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:4c726cac-be15-4942-a3bb-658edabe9554Post:7eae06d3-3fee-4dfb-b7e7-9cd00bf620be">Re: Offended by my MOH</a>:
[QUOTE]She's my MOH I can't stop talking to her about the wedding. Obviosusly we have other convos as well but she is throwing my shower---so she talks about it a lot I never ONCE mentioned a bachelor party to her. I don't know where this came from. It was so awkward and strange. Esp since my fiance doesn't like her bf and has met him twice. Why would he want a stranger to plan his bachelor party and how rude to say he has "no one else" lik ehe is some kind of loser with not a single friend or family member. If i told fiance she said that he'd not only be totally hurt he'd also be offended and mad at her
Posted by i2012do[/QUOTE]

jic

GoodLuckBear14 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_offended-my-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:4c726cac-be15-4942-a3bb-658edabe9554Post:f0ca5b19-2265-4526-bab8-2dea4513403a">Re: Offended by my MOH</a>:
[QUOTE]I didn't mean it like "I can't stop talking about" Like I talk non stopI meant I am unable to stop talking about the wedding because she is continually asking me questions about it. And asking me questions about the shower. and I am not always one to initiate a conversaton. Sometimes she initaties something. For instance she mentioned that she was at her boyfriends and told me she told him to "get on" planning my fiances bachelor party because he has NO ONE. I was talking about her going to see him, she initiated that conversation. I don't have to invite anyone I don't want to. Especially someone that called me a preverse name and insulted my fiance and called my mom a "skinny witch"
Posted by i2012do[/QUOTE]

jic

Girlie1030 · May 2012

I knew I recognized OP from somewhere -
http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_errr-another-poor-wedding-invite_.0

You've felt harrassed and/or bullied on TK for a long time now. I'm surprised you've stuck around.

i2012do · May 2012

i did.Online bullying is an epidemic and I am a huge propoont against it in my area. I even run a campaign.
I won't stop reporting bullies as long as they continue to do it.

MairePoppy · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_offended-my-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:4c726cac-be15-4942-a3bb-658edabe9554Post:5f198d45-6762-4b6d-be97-6a6aa46bba8f">Re: Offended by my MOH</a>:
[QUOTE]i did.Online bullying is an epidemic and I am a huge propoont against it in my area. I even run a campaign. I won't stop reporting bullies as long as they continue to do it.
Posted by i2012do[/QUOTE]

NuggetBrain · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_offended-my-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:4c726cac-be15-4942-a3bb-658edabe9554Post:5f198d45-6762-4b6d-be97-6a6aa46bba8f">Re: Offended by my MOH</a>:
[QUOTE]i did.Online bullying is an epidemic and I am a huge propoont against it in my area. I even run a campaign. I won't stop reporting bullies as long as they continue to do it.
Posted by i2012do[/QUOTE]

Lord, girl, quit trippin'.

anna.oskar · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_offended-my-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:4c726cac-be15-4942-a3bb-658edabe9554Post:5f198d45-6762-4b6d-be97-6a6aa46bba8f">Re: Offended by my MOH</a>:
[QUOTE]i did.Online bullying is an epidemic and I am a huge propoont against it in my area. I even run a campaign. I won't stop reporting bullies as long as they continue to do it.
Posted by i2012do[/QUOTE]

<div>Your constant reporting of people unjustly has made me fear that I too may one day become a target of your misguided wrath. As I am now living in a constant state of terror regarding my knot career, you by definition are either a bully or a terrorist. Please stop.</div>

kimiandgary · May 2012

You need thicker skin OP. This is one of the more mild posts I have seen. You weren't bullied, people just didn't agree with your plans.

You do need to keep social units together (esp you MOH's BF). You need to tell her BF the bachelor party is covered. You need to accept your shower graciously. You need to either a) buck up and tell your MOH her opinions aren't necessary or b) stop talking about the wedding. You picked this woman for a reason.

[Deleted User] · May 2012

wow leave this poor person alone!! she simply asked for advice! and honestly its YOUR day and you invite who you want! obviously they couldnt have been dating for very long since if shes your best friend and u only met him 2ce! if you don't like him then dont invite him! but you do need to talk to your MOH about her opinions! Don;t listen to these other people because the fact that they are teasing you for reporting online bullies says a million things about their character and kind nature! i agree with you i am completely against any form of bullying! and it needs to be reported, however you need to know the difference between bullying and opinions! someone saying that you are acting like a jerk is just their opinion of the situation! don't take it to heart because everyone reacts differently to the same situation! but if i were in your situation this is what i would do....
1- tell your MOH you appreciate her input but since it is YOUR wedding your say goes
2- the bachelor party isnt something her bf should be planning
3- explain the situation of her boyfriend with her and why hes not invited! if she freaks out and backs out then she really wasnt a friend because its your day you should only have ppl there that you WANT to be there!

Chin up and keep smiling this is your day don't let anyone near or far bring you down!!

Girlie1030 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_offended-my-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:4c726cac-be15-4942-a3bb-658edabe9554Post:49f3664f-5a6a-4a29-881c-a3e225c2e57f">Re: Offended by my MOH</a>:
[QUOTE]wow leave this poor person alone!! she simply asked for advice! and honestly its YOUR day and you invite who you want! obviously they couldnt have been dating for very long since if shes your best friend and u only met him 2ce! if you don't like him then dont invite him! but you do need to talk to your MOH about her opinions! Don;t listen to these other people because the fact that they are teasing you for reporting online bullies says a million things about their character and kind nature! i agree with you i am completely against any form of bullying! and it needs to be reported, however you need to know the difference between bullying and opinions! someone saying that you are acting like a jerk is just their opinion of the situation! don't take it to heart because everyone reacts differently to the same situation! but if i were in your situation this is what i would do.... 1- tell your MOH you appreciate her input but since it is YOUR wedding your say goes 2- the bachelor party isnt something her bf should be planning 3- explain the situation of her boyfriend with her and why hes not invited! if she freaks out and backs out then she really wasnt a friend because its your day you should only have ppl there that you WANT to be there! Chin up and keep smiling this is your day don't let anyone near or far bring you down!!
Posted by amandabornais2013[/QUOTE]

Do you need a cape? I'm sure there's one around here somewhere...

anna.oskar · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_offended-my-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:4c726cac-be15-4942-a3bb-658edabe9554Post:49f3664f-5a6a-4a29-881c-a3e225c2e57f">Re: Offended by my MOH</a>:
[QUOTE]wow leave this poor person alone!! she simply asked for advice! and honestly its YOUR day and you invite who you want! obviously they couldnt have been dating for very long since if shes your best friend and u only met him 2ce! if you don't like him then dont invite him! but you do need to talk to your MOH about her opinions! Don;t listen to these other people because the fact that they are teasing you for reporting online bullies says a million things about their character and kind nature! i agree with you i am completely against any form of bullying! and it needs to be reported, however you need to know the difference between bullying and opinions! someone saying that you are acting like a jerk is just their opinion of the situation! don't take it to heart because everyone reacts differently to the same situation! but if i were in your situation this is what i would do.... 1- tell your MOH you appreciate her input but since it is YOUR wedding your say goes 2- the bachelor party isnt something her bf should be planning 3- explain the situation of her boyfriend with her and why hes not invited! if she freaks out and backs out then she really wasnt a friend because its your day you should only have ppl there that you WANT to be there! Chin up and keep smiling this is your day don't let anyone near or far bring you down!!
Posted by amandabornais2013[/QUOTE]

<div>Thank you amandabornais for being yet another person who comes out of the lurking closet merely to validate someone's bad ideas or attitude. *gag*</div>

Viczaesar · May 2012

You know what I loathe and revile? When people say "Screw those people for being offended when I do something rude and shiitty! If they were a true friend they wouldn't mind me shiitting all over them!"

Maggie0829 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_offended-my-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:4c726cac-be15-4942-a3bb-658edabe9554Post:49f3664f-5a6a-4a29-881c-a3e225c2e57f">Re: Offended by my MOH</a>:
[QUOTE]wow leave this poor person alone!! she simply asked for advice! and honestly its YOUR day and you invite who you want! obviously they couldnt have been dating for very long since if shes your best friend and u only met him 2ce! if you don't like him then dont invite him! but you do need to talk to your MOH about her opinions! Don;t listen to these other people because the fact that they are teasing you for reporting online bullies says a million things about their character and kind nature! i agree with you i am completely against any form of bullying! and it needs to be reported, however you need to know the difference between bullying and opinions! someone saying that you are acting like a jerk is just their opinion of the situation! don't take it to heart because everyone reacts differently to the same situation! but if i were in your situation this is what i would do.... 1- tell your MOH you appreciate her input but since it is YOUR wedding your say goes 2- the bachelor party isnt something her bf should be planning 3- explain the situation of her boyfriend with her and why hes not invited! if she freaks out and backs out then she really wasnt a friend because its your day you should only have ppl there that you WANT to be there! Chin up and keep smiling this is your day don't let anyone near or far bring you down!!
Posted by amandabornais2013[/QUOTE]

FFS!

<a href="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/9/13/f934eb3a-06f8-4fe5-9d95-dc3166bc4097.large.jpg" title="Click to view a larger photo" class="PhotoLink"><img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/images/store/9/13/f934eb3a-06f8-4fe5-9d95-dc3166bc4097.medium.jpg" alt="" /></a>

sparent2010 · May 2012

Amanda I would suggest changing your SN t osomething that is not your full name, and I suggest pulling you head out of Jennifer's (ido2012) butt long enough to realize what she is doing is incredibly rude and hurtful to someone who is supposed to be her best friend.

OBX2011 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_offended-my-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:4c726cac-be15-4942-a3bb-658edabe9554Post:cf0784d2-2468-452b-8974-bb270c2b1ecb">Re: Offended by my MOH</a>:
[QUOTE]I knew I recognized OP from somewhere - <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_errr-another-poor-wedding-invite_.0">http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_errr-another-poor-wedding-invite_.0</a> You've felt harrassed and/or bullied on TK for a long time now. I'm surprised you've stuck around.
Posted by Girlie1030[/QUOTE]

Ohhhhhh goodness....I was such an arsss in that thread from 2011. That just proves that one should lurk before jumping in <img src="http://cdn.cl9.vanillaforums.com/downloaded/ver1.0/content/scripts/tinymce/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-undecided.gif" border="0" alt="Undecided" title="Undecided" />

anna.oskar · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_offended-my-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:357Discussion:4c726cac-be15-4942-a3bb-658edabe9554Post:318d4b9f-7cf8-4a18-881e-29e5c477ff44">Re: Offended by my MOH</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Offended by my MOH : Ohhhhhh goodness....I was such an arsss in that thread from 2011. That just proves that one should lurk before jumping in
Posted by OBX2011[/QUOTE]

<div>Yeah. You sure did come in like a raging ball of crazy newbie!</div><div>
</div><div>What would your response to her OP (from a year ago) be now I wonder? ;)</div><div>
</div><div>
</div><div>
</div><div>
</div><div>
</div><div>Hey OP!</div><div>
</div><div>In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_snarky-brides_errr-another-poor-wedding-invite?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:17Discussion:36ad1b16-e63d-4fed-9c76-ebb7d49c6d50Post:ea95aef7-3221-44b0-9dc6-9707772cccf4">Re: Errr. another poor wedding invite.</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Errr. another poor wedding invite. : <span style="background-image:initial;background-attachment:initial;background-origin:initial;background-clip:initial;border-style:initial;border-color:initial;border-image:initial;font-size:12px;outline-width:0px;outline-style:initial;outline-color:initial;vertical-align:baseline;font-family:Arial;border-width:0px;padding:0px;margin:0px;">Oh, and most of you have your first name and your picture in your profile. Beware what kind of online behaviors come back to bite you... there is no such thing as anyonomity anymore.</span>
<span style="font-family:Arial;font-size:12px;background-color:#ebf4fb;">Posted by i2012do</span> [/QUOTE] </div><div>
</div><div>This certainly sounds like a threat. Don't be a bully.</div>

Girlie1030 · May 2012

Sorry OBX.

OBX2011 · May 2012

Ahhhh, no worries. I actually got a pretty good laugh out of my asshattery

OBX2011 · May 2012

In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_moms-maids_offended-my-moh?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:357Discussion:4c726cac-be15-4942-a3bb-658edabe9554Post:77c0f3af-6b07-41ac-9d43-71724220240d">Re: Offended by my MOH</a>:
[QUOTE]In Response to Re: Offended by my MOH : Yeah. You sure did come in like a raging ball of crazy newbie! What would your response to her OP (from a year ago) be now I wonder? ;) Hey OP! In Response to Re: Errr. another poor wedding invite. : <strong>This certainly sounds like a threat. Don't be a bully.
</strong>Posted by anna.oskar[/QUOTE]

I was such an unbearable little shiiat ;)

OP: For the love of God....get ahold of yourself woman! You sound like Crazy McCrazyPants

And funny how OP thinks she is being harassed yet is the one commenting that it's not hard to find someone with their first name and profile pic. Someone hold me.

ETA: Are TK Gods censoring our words again? (shiiat??)

anna.oskar · May 2012

Yeah, the censoring increased last night. luckily the favorites still hold true: asshat & douchecanoe,

Offended by my MOH

Re: Offended by my MOH

Choose Another Board

Search Boards