Wedding Etiquette Forum

Using a friend's venue

I use the term "friend" lightly.  We used to be friends, but we drifted apart.  She now lives out of state.  I haven't talked to her in over a year and a half and my only way of contacting her would be on facebook.

She got married about a year ago and the pictures from her wedding make me drool over the venue.  It's perfect!  Would it be acceptable for me to message her on facebook to ask what the name of her venue was?  We likely won't be getting married for another year or two.  I'm not sure if she would be the type that would get weird about it and be mad if I wanted the same venue, but I honestly wouldn't be surprised if she did.  I have searched all over and I can't find it based on venue website pictures.

Re: Using a friend's venue

  • I see no problem with asking her.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_using-a-friends-venue?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e92aedff-0059-41ff-9d42-293de2ec17a7Post:52510fc2-930c-4211-94d5-50db7ea2e241">Using a friend's venue</a>:
    [QUOTE]I use the term "friend" lightly.  We used to be friends, but we drifted apart.  She now lives out of state.  I haven't talked to her in over a year and a half and my only way of contacting her would be on facebook. She got married about a year ago and the pictures from her wedding make me drool over the venue.  It's perfect!  Would it be acceptable for me to message her on facebook to ask what the name of her venue was?  We likely won't be getting married for another year or two. <strong> I'm not sure if she would be the type that would get weird about it and be mad if I wanted the same venue, but I honestly wouldn't be surprised if she did. </strong> I have searched all over and I can't find it based on venue website pictures.
    Posted by steph96[/QUOTE]

    Only one way to find out.
    The Bee Hive Est. June 30, 2007
    "So I sing a song of love, Julia"
    06.10.10

    BFAR:We Defined Our Own Success!
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  • have you tried tineye?  I might do that first....but I try to avoid awkward conversations.
  • Just ask. It would be weird for her to get upset because you wanted to use the same venue. Plus there are only so many in a given area so you're bound to use the same one as at least one person you know.
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    Anniversary
  • Do you have a mutual friend who may have attended the wedding and knows the venue?
  • Ask her.

    Formerly known as flutterbride2b
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  • I thought about asking someone that attended her wedding, but that would be even more awkward since I doubt they actually remember the name of it and they would tell her that I asked.  Plus I had a bigger falling out with everyone else (I quit the sorority and none of them have talked to me since--this girl actually graduated before I quit so she isn't bitter about it).

    I sent her a message asking!  Let's hope she responds and it is actually in my budget!
  • This question is weird and the responses are even weirder.  Just ask her.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_using-a-friends-venue?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e92aedff-0059-41ff-9d42-293de2ec17a7Post:4eb89b25-4fbd-46f7-b4df-0b6bd65590f3">Re:Using a friend's venue</a>:
    [QUOTE]If you aren't really friends and you rarely talk to her, who cares if she gets weird about it? Message her and ask.
    Posted by StageManager14[/QUOTE]

    <div>This!  What's the worst she can do - unfriend you on FB?</div>
  • This is going to sound super stalkacious, but can you find her wedding website? Clues to her venue from FB? Triangulate the location based on the pictures and then scouting wedding venues that fit those parameters (via polling your local board)?

  • Pearlaqua, you are a genius!!!  I don't know why I didn't think of that!  I found it!  Thanks!
  • Lisa50Lisa50 member
    5 Love Its Combo Breaker First Comment
    Ask her.  Nothing ventured, nothing gained.  Good luck!
  • Not weird at all. As someone who got a few messages on facebook similar, I think it is awesome and I welcomed every message.
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_using-a-friends-venue?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:e92aedff-0059-41ff-9d42-293de2ec17a7Post:a6a2096b-2f01-4204-98ec-5cc5baee968e">Re: Using a friend's venue</a>:
    [QUOTE]This question is weird and the responses are even weirder.  Just ask her.
    Posted by Joy2611[/QUOTE]

    <div>Right?</div>
  • That sounded like a heckuva lot of work that a 3 sentence message to her could have saved but I'm glad you found what you were looking for.
    The Bee Hive Est. June 30, 2007
    "So I sing a song of love, Julia"
    06.10.10

    BFAR:We Defined Our Own Success!
    image

  • hoffsehoffse member
    First Anniversary 5 Love Its First Answer Name Dropper
    I asked a girl who got married last august for band recs, etc. She's a member of my church and we both got/are getting married in the same place with the reception venue at the same location.  It's not a big deal.
    Wedding Countdown Ticker
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