Wedding Woes

s/o kuus's situation with the undisclosed house loan

Dear Amy: Three years ago when I started dating my husband, I asked him about kids and he said, "I could never have kids." Then I asked about what would happen if I got pregnant, and he said we would raise the child together. At the time having kids was not a priority for me, so I brushed it aside.

The problem is that once we got married (five months ago), I realized that having a child is a big priority for me and that I was running out of time.

I knew it was wrong, but I would accidentally-on-purpose skip days of my birth control, eventually ceasing to take the pills at all. I knew that if we had a child, my husband would grow to love it.

The problem was that, after months of this, I never conceived. A few weeks ago, I finally decided to broach the topic again with my husband.

I discovered that he had a vasectomy a year before we met!

He swears that he has mentioned it before, but I know he hasn't. I feel sick knowing that he kept something like this from me. I also feel trapped in my marriage knowing that it will always be just the two of us.

Should I get out while I can and find a husband who wants a child, or will I outgrow this need?

— Desperately Seeking a Child

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Re: s/o kuus's situation with the undisclosed house loan

  • PMeg819PMeg819 member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its First Answer
    edited December 2011

    "I could never have kids" is a lot different than "I don't want kids". Words people, listen to them. She's an idiot and he's a jack ass for not telling her straight out.

  • DG1DG1 member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011


    I love how she's all "I stopped taking my BC without telling him" and then gets pissed that he left out the part about having had a vasectomy.


    They're both douches.  But also - if you've had a vasectomy, why would you have your wife keep taking (and paying for) birth control pills?

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  • *Barbie**Barbie* member
    Knottie Warrior 5000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    i'm happy that people this moronic will not be reproducing.
  • nicoleg1982nicoleg1982 member
    5000 Comments
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_kuuss-situation-undisclosed-house-loan?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:27a05909-00cc-43c0-a419-3d3d55890f6bPost:bcfabc3b-b583-4e6c-9cb1-ffafaba0134b">Re: s/o kuus's situation with the undisclosed house loan</a>:
    [QUOTE]why would you have your wife keep taking (and paying for) birth control pills?
    Posted by DG1[/QUOTE]<div>1.  To keep covering up your vasectomy lie.</div><div>2.  Cycle/PMS regulation.

    </div>
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  • DG1DG1 member
    Ninth Anniversary 5000 Comments 25 Love Its Name Dropper
    edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_kuuss-situation-undisclosed-house-loan?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special%20Topic%20Wedding%20BoardsForum:47Discussion:27a05909-00cc-43c0-a419-3d3d55890f6bPost:df190a9f-8f9b-4bb9-afed-c9e2b9b6dc4c">Re: s/o kuus's situation with the undisclosed house loan</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: s/o kuus's situation with the undisclosed house loan : 1.  To keep covering up your vasectomy lie. 2.  Cycle/PMS regulation.
    Posted by nicoleg1982[/QUOTE]

    #2 is why *she* might be taking them. He might benefit, too, but most men aren't even aware that it does anything except prevent babies. He might be an exception, but it seems shady.


    I am continually fascinated by the number of people who want marriages based on lies.

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  • **O-Face****O-Face** member
    10000 Comments Sixth Anniversary 25 Love Its
    edited December 2011
    Huh.  It sounds like two idiots made for each other.
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  • edited December 2011
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/special-topic-wedding-boards_wedding-woes_kuuss-situation-undisclosed-house-loan?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Special Topic Wedding BoardsForum:47Discussion:27a05909-00cc-43c0-a419-3d3d55890f6bPost:bcfabc3b-b583-4e6c-9cb1-ffafaba0134b">Re: s/o kuus's situation with the undisclosed house loan</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>I love how she's all "I stopped taking my BC without telling him" and then gets pissed that he left out the part about having had a vasectomy.</strong> They're both douches.  But also - if you've had a vasectomy, why would you have your wife keep taking (and paying for) birth control pills?
    Posted by DG1[/QUOTE]

    they deserve each other
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  • edited December 2011
    Hee. This sounds like a show on Maury.
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