Wedding Etiquette Forum

time when a kid ruined a wedding LONG

I'm having kids at my wedding.  Because they're a part of our families, because we are lucky enough to be able to afford it, because it allows for less drama.

but the real reason is this...true story:

when i was six my aunt (mom's younger sis) got married.  i was the FG and my mom was a BM.  my 3yo sister was not in the WP but was at the ceremony.

as soon as she saw my mom walk down the aisle she started crying because she wanted her mom.  my dad picked her up to carry her out.  as soon as he does she starts WAILING.  as they reach the back of the synangogue she shouts in a shrill 3yo voice "DON'T DO THIS TO ME" like she was tyring to win an oscar.  it was amazingly dramatic.

while this could certainly be construed as "ruining the wedding" this is the family story we take out at almost every gathering.  no one ever talks about my mom's or her other sister's wedding.  this is the one relive.  becuase it was human and funny.  a crying child doesn't ruin anything.  they might distract briefly and create a pseudo-blooper reel for you.  my aunt and uncle were still married.  and i want a silly moment too.  (or at least, i don't fear it).
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Re: time when a kid ruined a wedding LONG

  • This is one of the reasons I'm allowing kids at my wedding too! They're a part of us and they can certaily add to wedding stories!!

    I totally expect my flower girl to try and swim in the fountain or something!
  • You gotta check out today's "No babies" post to get the relevance, Birdie.  We've got another one.  And Stacks started a new company! 
  • mizjodimizjodi member
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_time-kid-ruined-wedding-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:260898b4-da2b-40f7-96aa-6a5485e700c5Post:5abde95f-5d89-4ee6-abcd-49afb8364352">Re: time when a kid ruined a wedding LONG</a>:
    [QUOTE] Ok?
    Posted by Birdie1483[/QUOTE]

    see "how do I say no to babies?"
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  • We had kids at our wedding. NBD. They were fun.
  • mizjodimizjodi member
    First Comment
    Frankly, I think adults can make or break a wedding just as much, if not more, than kids/babies!
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  • Yea.  When my Aunt Maryanne kicks her shoes off and starts demanding that the band plays "Old Time Rock & Roll," the party's over.  Babies have nothing on a drunk aunt. 
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_time-kid-ruined-wedding-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:260898b4-da2b-40f7-96aa-6a5485e700c5Post:46ff33b8-ad1c-4402-b81a-dc6587a408b8">Re: time when a kid ruined a wedding LONG</a>:
    [QUOTE]Frankly, I think adults can make or break a wedding just as much, if not more, than kids/babies!
    Posted by mizjodi[/QUOTE]

    No kidding.  Just look at all the people trying to figure out how to exclude adults who are going to cause too much drama for them to be permitted at the wedding.
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  • All right, hlq.  This is bugging me.  You look like a girl I went to high school with.  Like, a lot.  Did we go to high school together?  What was your high school mascot? 
  • The gators.  Don't ask me why.
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  • Can I say that I'd SO much rather have a baby than a toddler at a wedding? I've been to so many where theres an entire GANG (tats and all) of small children taking up the entire dance floor and running around like heathens. Heathens I tell you!
    "In the old days my ass would be in your back yard picking cotton, so excuse me if I don't put much stock in how f*cking awesome the old days were." -Nuggs
  • HippinhipsterHippinhipster member
    First Comment
    edited May 2011
    I love kids at weddings! When we started planning I really wanted everyone's kids to be invited to our wedding but unfortunately we can't afford 75-80 more people (yes we know a lot of kids lol) so we're only have OOT guest's children, breastfeeding babies, family, and those in the wedding. I can't imagine a wedding without someone's child doing something hilarious.
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  • I"m such a fail today guyths!!
  • Mel, curious.  Since you were the one who brought up the complaint about specifically including only breastfeeding babies as the exception to the no-kids rule, what age would you make the cutoff?  How many months? 

    Breastfeeding strikes me as a very neat cutoff, but where you and others have a problem with it (which I'm not arguing, mind) that I never thought about, I'm curious.


    image
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_time-kid-ruined-wedding-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:260898b4-da2b-40f7-96aa-6a5485e700c5Post:46ff33b8-ad1c-4402-b81a-dc6587a408b8">Re: time when a kid ruined a wedding LONG</a>:
    [QUOTE]Frankly, I think adults can make or break a wedding just as much, if not more, than kids/babies!
    Posted by mizjodi[/QUOTE]

    Word.

    OP, LOVE that story!  :)
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_time-kid-ruined-wedding-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:260898b4-da2b-40f7-96aa-6a5485e700c5Post:d2e06437-d06f-4014-8d7b-d401796c7f33">Re: time when a kid ruined a wedding LONG</a>:
    [QUOTE]The gators.  Don't ask me why.
    Posted by hlq2011[/QUOTE]

    <div>Ha my brother went to school up the hill (if this means nothing and there are more gator mascots in Baltimore, ignore this :))</div><div>
    </div><div>OP--That story's cute and that's my thought on having kids at weddings.  I figure if anything "bad" happens it'll just make the wedding more unique and will be a good story to tell.</div>
    Anniversary
  • I actually went to school in Massachusetts, tayylor

    Rural Mass, as a matter of fact.  I have yet to figure out the reason for our mascot
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  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_time-kid-ruined-wedding-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding BoardsForum:9Discussion:260898b4-da2b-40f7-96aa-6a5485e700c5Post:adc572e7-b030-4eb0-b5da-61248063fe75">Re: time when a kid ruined a wedding LONG</a>:
    [QUOTE]Mel, curious.  Since you were the one who brought up the complaint about specifically including only breastfeeding babies as the exception to the no-kids rule, what age would you make the cutoff?  How many months?  Breastfeeding strikes me as a very neat cutoff, but where you and others have a problem with it (which I'm not arguing, mind) that I never thought about, I'm curious.
    Posted by hlq2011[/QUOTE]

    You know, I'm not sure, and I'm really glad that I'm not in a situation where I'd need to make that decision.  I know for certain, though, that I wouldn't be comfortable in a situation where I had to say, "Yes, Mary, I know your baby and Heather's baby are precisely the same age.  However, Heather is breastfeeding, which your flat nipples won't allow, so her baby is in and your baby is out." 

    Breastfeeding is also an odd indicator for me because some mothers nurse  longer than others.  I breastfed my first child exclusively for 6 months.  Two of my cousins had babies within the same month- one breastfed for 3 months, and another was still breastfeeding at the two year mark.  We had three babies, the same age, but with the breastfeeding cutoff, only some of us might have been allowed to bring our babies to a hypothetical wedding with this rule. 

    I don't know what the magic age is. Personally, I don't bring my kids to evening weddings, but might consider bringing them to morning or afternoon events if they were specifically invited.  Even when they were very little (I was a bridesmaid when my first was five months old and still breastfeeding) I preferred to have the night off to be an adult, full time.  My younger was bottlefed, and I also left him home for the numerous weddings we've attended over the past two years.  But that's me, what I'm comfortable with, and what I know my kids can handle.  With kids under a year, I feel like leaving that decision to the parent is best.  So I guess my magic age is 12 months. 

    Also, your doppelganger is a Canuck, in case you were wondering. 
  • annakb8annakb8 member
    First Comment
    In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_time-kid-ruined-wedding-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:260898b4-da2b-40f7-96aa-6a5485e700c5Post:e21fffe1-8683-4d8b-a326-201039df2f6c">Re: time when a kid ruined a wedding LONG</a>:
    [QUOTE]I actually went to school in Massachusetts, tayylor Rural Mass, as a matter of fact. <strong> I have yet to figure out the reason for our mascot</strong>
    Posted by hlq2011[/QUOTE]

    Because gators are the best mascots around.
  • Oh, woops! lol I think the mascot was a random pick at the school here, everything else was already taken by the time the school was founded
    Anniversary
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_time-kid-ruined-wedding-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:260898b4-da2b-40f7-96aa-6a5485e700c5Post:bc1197f0-1bf0-474a-9478-d244a99c5bea">Re: time when a kid ruined a wedding LONG</a>:
    [QUOTE]In Response to Re: time when a kid ruined a wedding LONG : With kids under a year, I feel like leaving that decision to the parent is best.  So I guess my magic age is 12 months.  Also, your doppelganger is a Canuck, in case you were wondering. 
    Posted by The Mel and Todd Show[/QUOTE]

    Haha, good to know :)

    As I was reading through, I was kind of coming to that same conclusion - leaving it to the parents' discretion.  We didn't invite kids beyond our own first cousins, and didn't hear any complaints, but I'd like to think that if any of the parents we invited wanted to bring their babies, we'd have been flexible.
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  • I think stuff like that is cute when the parents are actually doing something to control it (obviously you can't stop a kid from crying, but if they are at least trying, I don't mind one bit), but it annoys me to no end when the parents sit there and just let the baby cry.  This isn't just at weddings though, I hate that anywhere. 

    In general though, most of the kids I've seen at weddings are freaking adorable.  At FI's friends wedding, the only children they had there was the ring bearer and flower girl (both about 2 years old) and during the B&G's first dance, the little kids wanted to be like them, so they were slow dancing at the corner of the dance floor.  It was the cutest thing ever.  Of course the bride got pissed though because everyone was looking at the kids and not her (they were the perfect bride/groomzilla couple throughout their entire planning/wedding day though, so that explains why they got mad about it)
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  • eh...i still hate kids.
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  • I ruined my parent's friends' wedding when I was two.  The church bells were ringing during mass and I kept saying "hello, hello" from the back of the church.  My dad was a GM and he and his buddies standing up front, all broke out laughing.  I'm pretty sure they are still married though.
  • I'm only inviting kids if they are family or if their parents are in the wedding.  But that is because we can only invite a limited number of people and this was a way to keep the guest list down. 

    My MOH will ahve a new born at the wedding and she mentioned to me "what if my baby cries during the wedding?"  I'm like then your baby cries.  I love children so I would be just fine with babies crying kids, talking or yelling out "Dont' Do This To Me!"  I'm sure that one of my nieces is not going to like seeing her mom, up at the alter and not being able to be up there too.  but that's ok, kids are so cute and candid that they can make the day all the more special.
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  • blush64blush64 member
    First Anniversary First Comment
    I think that's a really cute story. It wouldn't bother me at all if that kind of thing happens.
  • Dedra57Dedra57 member
    First Comment
    edited May 2011
    I prefer weddings that have children.  They always seem more fun.  It might not be because of the children but because the B&G are less uptight (so they aren't afraid of children 'ruining' their special day.)


    Edit: By the way, I just realized I'm on my mom's account right now. Funny how that happens what with me being on her computer. Just FYI.
  • In Response to <a href="http://forums.theknot.com/Sites/theknot/Pages/Main.aspx/wedding-boards_etiquette_time-kid-ruined-wedding-long?plckFindPostKey=Cat:Wedding%20BoardsForum:9Discussion:260898b4-da2b-40f7-96aa-6a5485e700c5Post:b04f6daf-c169-4a0c-b00c-89b9d3b5dce7">Re: time when a kid ruined a wedding LONG</a>:
    [QUOTE]<strong>I prefer weddings that have children.  They always seem more fun.  It might not be because of the children but because the B&G are less uptight (so they aren't afraid of children 'ruining' their special day.) </strong>Edit: By the way, I just realized I'm on my mom's account right now. Funny how that happens what with me being on her computer. Just FYI.
    Posted by Dedra57[/QUOTE]

    Ha.  Then don't come to mine.  I guarantee lameness.  And I guess I am totally uptight.

    Totally.
    Bi-oh-rama
    Now with more wedded bliss.


    I don't get married often, but when I do, I do it in Las Vegas.

    image

    "Lvharpy could be your AE." - direy25
    "smokeybailey is the one shining beacon of light in this steaming turd of a thread." - daffodil_jill
    "The almighty smokeybailey has spoken." - some bitch on the Las Vegas board

  • AmitzahAmitzah member
    First Comment
    I was at a friends wedding in October where his niece was a flower girl.  On the walk out of the synagogue she started hopping on one foot, turns out her foot had fallen asleep during the ceremony.  It was adorable. Her 3 year old brother was supposed to be a ring bearer but decided he needed a nap instead. 

    The family hired a babysitter for the reception and set them up in their hotel room with movies and games.  It seemed to work out.

    We plan to have children at our wedding (FI has 11 nieces and nephews), but only family.  Have to limit the chaos somehow.  We're still debating on the reception. May go the babysitter route.
  • My son was 4 when he was my brothers RB...needless to say he skipped out of the ceremony about halfway through to sit with mama, at least he left his shoes at the altar.

    We are having an outdoor wedding and reception so I am renting a bouncy house to keep the kiddos entertained, weddings can be boring for kids might as well let them have a little fun too.
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